Life for me as a jw (not really) teenager

by DuvanMuvan 46 Replies latest jw experiences

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  DuvanMuvan

  I forgot to mention that the first thing the elder asked me when I told him that I didn't think the jws had the truth was "Have you been told this from somewhere?" he didn't even ask my why before he asked this. So according to him, I'm guessing that either I'm not able to come to that conclusion by myself because I'm only a teenager, the gb were right when they said that every "worldly" person is out to lead me away from the "truth" or that nobody could even think of saying such a thing without someone telling them so because it's so obviously the truth.

  It was also nice to actually say no when someone in the kh asks something for the first time. I always felt too bad and always ended up saying yes to everything.
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  DuvanMuvan

  On the way to the memorial today my mum and I had a conversation that pretty much went like this:

  mum: Duvan try not to be too frank if someone asks why you haven't been to a meeting in a while

  me: what do you mean?

  mum: well instead of saying things like you don't believe in god or that the bible is god's word, just say that you aren't sure about some things

  me: why should I do that, if they're my beliefs why does it matter how I say it?

  mum: well because when you say things like that I'm worried that you sound like an apostate. I haven't given birth to an apostate have I?

  me: wait what IS an apostate?

  mum: you know, those people that say things about the witnesses on the internet etc

  me: what do they say

  mum: I don't know, apostate things

  that last part isn't exactly what she said but I know it made the same amount of sense as what she said
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  KateWild

  Duvan,

  Tread lightly for the moment. Treat your mum tenderly, she is obviously worried you will be viewed as an apostate. You will no doubt not care what the cong thinks of you, but it could make things uncomfortable for your mum.

  My advice would be to keep your good bond with her and explain to her you don't want to be a hypocrite and hide your beliefs. Ask her if you can both sit down with your dad as well to explain your position. Then you can speak to your dad alone and tell him your mum might get a little flack in the cong so she might need him to listen to her get some things off her chest.

  You are only 15 you are not responsible for how your mum feels and the consequences that come with you being viewed as an apostate. That is your dads job that is what marriage is all about. He is supposed to be a supportive husband to his wife. He seems pretty easy going as he permitted her to take you from the age of 7, I am sure if your mum feels uncomfortable in the cong your dad will be there for her.

  Kate xx
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  Frazzled UBM

  Duvan -

  I loved the line: "I haven't given birth to an apostate have I?" How did that make you feel? A classic cult mother guilt trip there. I think the response would have been either to have said: "Well you couldn't have given birth to an apostate as at the time I wasn't able to form a conscious thought, let alone get baptized and then realize that what I had been baptized into didn't make any sense." or alternatively you could have asked her: "and how do you feel about the thought that your son may be an apostate?" to see how she reacted.

  I agree with Kate that you need to thread carefully with your Mum. You are still her son. You may want to sound her out by explaining to her that you are trying to work out who you are and what you believe and that you have questions and she should respect that. Tell her that you are not sure whether there is only one Truth, namely ther Truth according the WBTS and so you are asking questions and you need her help in finding the answers to your questions. See how she responds. It may be that she ends up with the cult response of "accept the Truth or I will shun you" but at least give her the benefit of the doubt for the time being and see what happens. She may surprise you.

  Good luck Fraz
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  konceptual99

  Duvan - you will have a PM in the next few mins....
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  never a jw

  I am afraid you are an apostate now. Now God will curse you for the rest of your life with freedom and plenty of opportunities to make yourself and others truly happy an fulfilled. As a JW you either pretend to be, or are delusionally happy. Congratulations on your decision to come to the Dark Side. By the way, you are very smart for a 15 y.o.
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  DuvanMuvan

  Thanks never a jw.

  i wanna see how my mum reacts when she realises that I apparently fit the description of an apostate to an extent but I'm still the same person as I always was. She has been leaniant in the past so she might realise that when they talk about apostates or "worldy people" it doesnt apply to everyone who isn't a jw.