Thank you so much for sharing your story. I was once disfellowshipped too after admitting it, being repentant and telling them of mental health issues. I hung around long enough to get reinstated and accept all the congratulatory handshakes, but I never went back after that night.
My brother and sister were also disfellowshipped, one for not meeting with the elders for a jc, but neither of them bothered with the reinstatement process. I only did it so my mother wouldn't feel like she had to shun me, but she speaks to all of us and treats us the same even though she and my dad are pioneers.