How Do You Come to Terms with Being Just One of the 7 Billion?

will-be-apostate

Being a jw makes one feel special, no doubt. When I found out TTATT I realized I'm not special at all. I'm just one of the other 7 billion human beings who will live and die being nobody, the world will forget about them (and I'm not talking about relatives and friend), they didn't make anything special in their life, they didn't change the course of history, were not famous nor rich, didn't invent facebook, google or anything awesome, didn't have an article published in Newscientist, had no imdb profil, not even a wiki page, didn't write a book etc. When I watch interviews of people who brought innovative ideas to life I wonder how awesome it would be to go to bed every night knowing that I count, to go out in the city and say: yeah, you see that, that's possible because of me.

Now, there is a moment when you start calculating your chances, the odds for big things to happen with you, and you realize: nope, that's not gonna happen, you were born in the wrong place and wrong time, needed to fight for things that for others come with the package.

Being raised up as a jw, I think I'm not starting life from zero, I'm starting from minus (insert three digit number here). It's like fighting in a war of which outcome has already been decided. I realize I can't get out of this situation without hurting myself and all the people who are important to me. I want to be able to become an insensitive person and just stop caring about how others might feel if I did this thing or that thing. Sometimes it happens but that's just despair and anger claiming my brain.

A reset button would be handy. I'm not making the depressed, low-selfesteemed guy here, just am trying to be realistic. If you understand anything from the above I'm open for your thoughts. And no offense for those individuals on this forum who did achieved something big in life; I know there are such members; better said no offense to anybody.

Julia Orwell

You're not a nothing. You're part of a great thing, whatever you choose to be. We can't all be famous or change history, but if we can just be the best person we can be to ourselves and the people around us and be happy, then we win.

adjusted knowledge

I know what you mean about feeling special because how we were taught. We were taught that God knew the name of every star and so each of us were special in his eye. Even before I left the organization I no longer had that feeling of being special. The trigger was when I saw the images of the Catacombs of Paris. There were walls as far as the eye can see of human skulls stacked upon each other. I learned latter there were millions of remains down there. Looking at those skulls and thinking each one was unique at one point in existence but long forgotten. The bible may condemn, "Let's eat, drink, and marry for tommorrow we shall die"; but can you really blame people for this attitude.

Gypsy Sam

Look around your community and find ways to volunteer. When you connect with someone you can help, for unselfish reasons, you've made a difference. I have zero interest in going down in history books, but knowing that in my community, I make a difference, instills a sense of worth in me. There is never a shortage of organizations that need help, especially children born into poverty or families facing domestic violence.

cultBgone

Will-Be, that's an interesting take on the matter, I really enjoy hearing our different experiences.

Funny, for me it was exactly the opposite. Although we were told Jehovah was closely watching over us and even numbered the hairs on our heads, I somehow felt he had a closer relationship with all the stars in the heavens (real ones) than he did with me. No matter how much I did in (his) service, no matter how hard I studied, no matter how much biblical insight I shared with my children, I never felt "special" and I couldn't understand how he could love me so greatly and yet allow my family members to be abused in "his only true religion".

Yet about a year into my fade, I came across a book which stressed how much our creator loves each of us, and that we part of his divine creation and are here for a reason. Deeper than just that, but suffice it to say that I began to think of myself as truly important to my creator...not channeled by a group of men with their own interests at heart.

It took getting out for me to feel loved and important.

YOU are loved and important! PM me if you'd like my very short reading list of a few small books that opened my mind and my heart to love myself.

Laika

I agree with every word you wrote, but does this have to be a negative?

It's a great relief to know that the world will go on without me, to stop trying to have impact and just enjoy what's around me. See yourself for what you are, stop trying to become 'someone'. It never works anyway. Read Ecclesiastes by King Solomon or for a contemporary version listen to Pinocchio story by Kanye West. These are guys who in theory had/have everything you thought mattered in your post, guess what? They're still unfulfilled.

Fame/money are not the route to fulfillment. Want to feel fulfilled? Find some good friends and take them out for a good meal, there is nothing better.

As Solomon said 'who needs meaning when you can have lunch?' (my paraphrase - ecc 5:18-20)

mynameislame

Learning TTATT puts you way ahead not behind.

The only thing holding you back is your "that's not gonna happen" attitude.

If you have a "I know it's going to happen" attitude you will be on the look out for opportunties and many will come along.

I like this quote and it seems fitting.

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.”
― Henry Ford

stuckinarut2

Life is what we make of it.

We can choose to be happy or sad, we can choose to be positive or negative.

But...hang on...no, unless we are part of a 100ish year old religion, we will be tortured and destroyed, as our blood splashes to the heights of the bridles of horses (revelation book reference)...even those little sweet kids playing happily in the park will be killed because they are part of the 7 Billion non witnesses...

ahh...witnesses actually beleive this? WE actually used to beleive this??

will-be-apostate

Thank you for sharing your opinions on this matter. I agree that we can't be all famous. I guess I need to be a lot more positive. That song by Kenye West has an interesting lyrics. CultBgone, I've sent you a pm :)

It sounds like you are all beleivers. I'd like to know what do atheist members think about this subject.

Mynameislame: I often think if those kind of quotes really reflect the author's point of view or they just say cuz it sounds nice from a people in his position to say such things.

Stuckinarut2: Yeah, we used to knock on people's door saturday morning and "preach" to them the "good" news.

Phaedra

Hi will-be-apostate,

Just yesterday I was speaking my own very similar thoughts as you did in your OP, as a culmination of trying to carve out a sustainable path in this world with my life over the last two decades. I, like millions of other JWs who will eventually die, was nicely catapulted into the world right out of high school into a system that was supposed to 'end' before I had to grow up in this world and need to make a living for myself.

I've had both abudnant and fallow seasons in my work and in making a 'mark', so to speak, but I can't seem to bypass the sentiments of Eccelesiastics and feeling like it's all a striving after the wind.

Incidently, I was triggered by seeing the bones of my toes under my skin and muscles as I flexed and stretched my bare feet while sitting on the sofa drinking my coffee before going to work. That made me think of my skeletal system, and the 'bones' that we all end up being after we've come and gone our short time on this earth.

That reminded me of a documentary about Pompeii I saw, where the skeletal remains of a very wealthy (royal?) family were found lying with many gold bands and bracelets and other jewelry still around their dead bones, lying next to their "servants" who had nothing of the sort, but arrived just in time for the same fate as their masters because of the volcano lava.

Death, the great equilizer, which none of us gets to bypass. That's one of the ways I've been able to come to terms with being just one of the 7 billion. Life does seem to be like one big act in a play, with all its varied actors, doesn't it?

And yet, being here right now in this connection with others seems miraculous.

Phae

How Do You Come to Terms with Being Just One of the 7 Billion?

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