My wifes best friends husband has "irratable bowel syndrome" he no longer attends any meetings, the memorial, any convention or assembly, yet he works 60 hours a week and tinkers on their vehicles for fun. He can do everything but do JW stuff. When his wife is questioned about him, she says its IBS. I admire his skill in doing a full fade this way.. I wonder if he knows TTATT? Maybe I should just ask him straight up. If he says "whats that" Ill just say, oh its nothing... A joke. If he says yes, then I have a new best friend lol.
How Many Had Chronic fatigue syndrome?
by OnTheWayOut 43 Replies latest jw friends
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Violia
I have this and it is not funny nor is it my get out of jail card free. It has caused major changes in my life and is not necessarily related to stress. I would hate to wsih this on anyone but sometimes I think that is what it takes before the ridiculers understand how this feels. Sort of like the folks who think everyone with back pain are fakers, I wish that on you and anyone who makes fun of others who are ill.
What goes around comes around . Better hope your health holds out. Or put another way, F*** you for making light of sick people.
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nonjwspouse
Violia,
Illness that is not visible, but can be transiet is easily faked. They can also be made worse with stress ( anything JW related can be a stressor to these people as well) I have IBS and I know it is no fun and seriously can keep me homebound sometimes. But it is not constant.
Migraines can be faked as well. This is why I fear going out of town without my medications, because if I have one and need to go to an emergency room I will be treated like a drug seeker.
Don't blame those who see the fakes and call them on it. The fakes need to be called out. It's just it is hard to figure out who is faking, right Violia?
CFS is debated in the medical community as a symptom of other illness, and not an illness of itself. Whether it is or isn't is not really known for sure. Kind of like ADD is debated as a symptom of underlying illness, and not an illness in and of itself simply to be treated. Debate aside, those with the illness, or symptoms, it is no laughing matter to them, they just want relief. It's a pity that so many do fake it to "use" as an excuse.
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Violia
a lot of people see " fakers" b/c they don't believe it is a real illness. There aren't as many fakers as one might think. So many people are ill and can't get proper treament or in some cases disability due to hateful attitudes among the medical profession and others who think if they have never had this illness--well it can't be real.
I will not defend anyone who mocks the ill for any reason. They should get to see what it feels like to be so lethargic you can't get out of bed.
Just b/c an illness does not have a name does not mean it does not exist. Many of the autoimmune diseases look very vague when they first present and many people ( typically the poor) are called fakers until the illness is so bad no one can deny it exists. So many people treated so badly due to hatefilled attitudes toward the sick.
Walk a few steps in someone elses shoes. Learn to be more tolerant. Even the jws who are sick due to stress are ill. BTW, I have had migranes , the mother of all migranes. I lay in bed for 3 days b/c we could not afford to go to a hospital . And once you do go they treat you as a drug seeker. My doc gave the meds to treat myself at home. IBS, is real. it is not always stress, although stress makes it worse. Even if it is stress, why do you or anyone else want to downplay this? Stress is very real and is a killer.
Stop mocking the ill , all of you. It is disgraceful.
ex spelling, no spell check
found a link about lack of empathy, sympathy etc
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Violia
I must recall however that: passage 36
The soft overcomes the hard.
The slow overcomes the fast.
Let your workings remain a mystery.
Just show people the results.
Written by Lao-tzu-- Tao Te Ching
From a translation by S. Mitchelland so you know I do have a sense of humor
http://www.cracked.com/article_19209_the-5-strangest-ways-your-mind-can-get-your-body-sick.html
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stuckinarut2
No one is mocking those who really suffer from an illness.
The ones mocking are actually those who dilute the real suffering of others by pretending to have something when they don't....
As I mentioned ( as did others here who also spent time in bethel ), many times I saw bethelites who wanted a change of assignment, or wanted to leave often suddenly "came down with something"....
My roommate did the same. He was fine, but didnt like his assigned job, so within two days came in the room and said "I have cfs and have asked for a change of assignment" (hey jwfacts you might have even known him?...)
So yes, be angry with those people for faking it and casting doubts on real sufferers!
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Legacy
Hi All,
I think what the commenter was trying to bring out is that has anyone noticed how in the JW org. there are alot of sick folks. Yes, some are really sick but some aren't. They were just asking if this was common in their hall now or when they were there ? I have IBS, Lactose Intolerant, & Allergies... I keep it moving as much as possible. Some days are worse than others but I don't use them as a badge of honor or to get out of something. I suppress alot of the information the JW's feed, but I come here to vent it out....That's the key to let it out in a safe place. This site is safe...just as long as you use an alias or that you don't describe an incident from your hall or mention names. Because you don't know who may be on this site, just checking so they can make some brownie points with the elders. None of us are saying, that all JW's are fakers, but we agree that there are some. Some play it to the end. As they say milking it.
Many of us have illnesses but don't use them to get out of our responsibility. But sometimes you do have to use your sick card....we all do.
Legacy
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OnTheWayOut
Legacy, you have a good point with how "they start a medical record with the friends."
Nonjwspouse, I am glad Legacy had something to help you.
BU2B, that's right along the lines of what we are talking about, but that guy chose an extremely personal delicate matter so they wouldn't discuss it. Heck, he might really have irritated bowels whenever he's at JW meetings. Thanks for the comment.
Violia, notice the thread opening included " I am not saying that the actual CFS is not real." I think we have the spirit here that there are many who exagerate and many that self-diagnose and use the get-out-of-jail-free card, and I am sure there are a few fakers as well. I work in the emergency medical field and see plenty of fakers and those that exagerate for their own reasons, but that doesn't mean there are not many legitimately ill people or people whose neck and back were hurt in an accident. And I do tread lightly with the individuals in case they really are sick or hurt. So sorry that this thread upsets you. Please take it in the spirit it is meant or leave it if you must.
Thanks for your additional thoughts, Stuckinarut2, Legacy. I was also pointing out that people may have depression and lack of energy for real, but due to the cognitive dissonance that being a JW causes. In other words, real symptoms without knowing the root problem.
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twice shy
Nope, but have a well documented illness that if it flared up could take me away from meeetings for months at a time. The sad part is when I could be there I was. My absence had nothing to do with my spirituality- had everything to do with my health.) It was a huge part of my life and no one was going to tell me what I needed to do to take care of me. (They hated the stance I had taken.)
Having dealt with my illness for so long I knew just how to manage it so I wouldn't get worse. I did what worked for me. I didn't care how it looked to the Elders or their fake a$$ wives. Even though I was very straight forward with them they viewed extended absences as being spiritually weak (although, I studied constantly). SMH
Having left and coming to this board I laugh all the time now because as mines was real...it appears they were looking at me as fading and at that time nothing could of been further from the truth.
The sad part is when I decided to leave I was at a very good place.
They were having yet another "new light" watchtower and I just left after the public talk one day and have not been back.
I take great comfort in answering them with the ..." well, you all will have to deal with Jehovah on how YOU dealt merciless and compassionless with his sheep." It vexes them.
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Violia
I worked in the medical field for a very long time too. I was working one night in the ER as a student. The nurse told me a woman had just come in who had bad headaches. She said they all knew she just wanted drugs. She was a frequent flyer. So she let me give her the the pain injection b/c I was a student and needed to learn ( I am sure it was painful as i was very new) Later that month she told me she had heard that woman had a brain tumor and she "almost felt bad" about being so mean but "oh well". Can you say cold blooded? or major burn out? A number of those in the medical field are just that-- burn outs that should not be allowed near people.
Who died and made you God so you get to declare someone a faker? Do you have extra powers so you can tell if someone is faking?
If I was in Bethel I'd say anything to be sent home.
I know many jws who are ill from stress b/c there life is filled with stress. Toward the end I had anxiety attacks just walking into a kh. I knew other sisters who also had them. Poor people.