GUILT TRIPS AND EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL!!! (page 2)

ruderedhead

You have to have your daughter's back, DD. What happened is messed up, your daughter may wind up with emotional issues if things continue to go this way, and she could place some blame on you later on for not protecting her from her Mom's emotional abuse.

Lovingly exert your headship from now on. There are times you will be able to compromise. Sometimes you may have to gently overrule yor wife. But don't allow her to abuse your child, understanding that she is doing what she has been taught by the wt idiots. Her intent isn't to hurt her child. Hopefully your daughter doesn't have too much time with Mom when you aren't there so Mom can't manipulate.

I'm sure you can find plenty of credible material online regarding guilt trips and manipulation, including ways to curb it.

You have your work cut out for you. Wishing you all the best.

clarity

Have a read thru SOSO's thread ...quite a trip!

Hope you can get it all sorted. You are the MAN.

Therefore you are ..... special in jw land.

Assert your authority Data ...you might even turn

her on!!!!!!!!!!!! She will be putty in your hands!!! :-)

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/experiences/255379/1/Part-3-My-mother-continues-to-try-to-ruin-me#.U4f6hm9OVlY

clarity

Listener

Tread very carefully where your daughter is concerned. She is manipulating you by trying to get your sympathy and to side with her.

Sit down with your wife and ask her what is really upsetting her and you'd like to make things better for her. She probably feels like she has to deal with everything and you are not sharing the load with her (JW responsibilities) and this includes that possibly your daughter is not so interested in the religion. There's not much you can do about being a good JW just to make peace at home unless you feel so inclined but that won't do you any good mentally. Instead you'll need to deal with the behaviour in a more logical, down to earth way. For instance, in relation to your daughter ask her if your daughter's reaction was appropriate and what could have led to her bad feelings, discuss whether you both could have dealt with it differently.

Also ask her why it upset her so much that you didn't put your pledge slip in. This would be a good opportunity to tell her that you are not happy with the arrangement and that you feel that if/when you want to donate money you would rather do it from your heart rather than having your hand forced in providing a set amount.

Listener

Tread very carefully where your daughter is concerned. She is manipulating you by trying to get your sympathy and to side with her.

Sit down with your wife and ask her what is really upsetting her and you'd like to make things better for her. She probably feels like she has to deal with everything and you are not sharing the load with her (JW responsibilities) and this includes that possibly your daughter is not so interested in the religion. There's not much you can do about being a good JW just to make peace at home unless you feel so inclined but that won't do you any good mentally. Instead you'll need to deal with the behaviour in a more logical, down to earth way. For instance, in relation to your daughter ask her if your daughter's reaction was appropriate and what could have led to her bad feelings, discuss whether you both could have dealt with it differently.

Also ask her why it upset her so much that you didn't put your pledge slip in. This would be a good opportunity to tell her that you are not happy with the arrangement and that you feel that if/when you want to donate money you would rather do it from your heart rather than having your hand forced in providing a set amount.

AudeSapere

When did you marry my mom???

I feel bad for your daughter but sadly, have no articles to share. Hopefully someone brilliant will give you an assist.

Hugs to the daughter.

-Aude.

AudeSapere

Actually, rather than articles, how about just standing up for your daughter? Tell the mother that Jesus would not guilt someone into going to a meeting. And manipulating her into attending by threatening to withhold a treat (tomorrow's event) does nothing but confuse and anger the daughter. The meeting is on a school nite. The social event is not. Tell mom to 'back-off'. It's tough enough being a teenager. If she needs a break one evening and chooses to stay home (with dad), and rest, then let her. You will be hero to your daughter. (Mom... not so much.)

Hope it all works out for you.

-Aude.

Band on the Run

Oh, severe abuse. Crying once in a while. Being ordered to stop crying or you will be beat even worse. Aren't we happy Witnesses? Once when I was a child, my mom served figs. We never had a fig outside of fig newtons. I was told if I threw up he would make me eat the vomit. He would have! I prayed not to throw up.

Of all JW life, being a JW teenager must be the worst. Every teen wants to behave like 70 year old spinsters. Imagine a young woman being exposed to subjugation crap.

OUTLAW

............................

..................................................................................... ...OUTLAW

jhine

Do you feel that you have to go carefully or you will lose your wife and daughter if you are too open in your opposition ? That is emotionally blackmailing you . Like Lisa Rose my first thought was "the husband is the head of the house " My husband would have just said "she is not well enough to go , she stays " and that would have been it . It strikes me that so many JW children are seeing the role model of men being pushed aside as the head of a family and being ignored as peope with rights because of this hold that the Watchtower has on women . Of course it happens the other way round as well , but as a group who claim to folow Biblical teaching here we see again a group following the teaching of the Octopopes .

Jan

jwleaks

http://wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation

GUILT TRIPS AND EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL!!!

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