Dating Advice needed

by KateWild 51 Replies latest social relationships

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    Well I joined two dating sites yesterday and I have had lots of messages. A couple of guys want to chat to me by phone to get to know me better. I've been asked out on two dates. So not really that bad for bieng on dating sites for less than 48 hours.

    There seems to be quite a number of divorced 40-55 year old males around. I am sorry if you're a divorced male 56 or over, I just had to pick a range, I would go on a date with a 56 year old if he was the right man.

    Anyway I would like advice. How do guys feel if their date is dating multiple guys? Is dating multiple guys ethical?

    My past JW life is only a few months in my past and I come to JWN all the time. I have a coffee date at 10am UK time. Should I tell my coffee date, and the guys that ring me, about my JW past? I want to be open and I want to find a caring, understanding person. It is a big part of my life. Should it be?

    I am nervous and excited

    Kate xx

  • bigmac
    bigmac

    dont tell a new guy about your jw past--he wont be interested.

    also----before you meet a guy--ask him for his home landline telephone number--so you can call him on it

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    dont tell a new guy about your jw past--he wont be interested.- Bigmac

    What exactly are new guys interested in? I am looking for someone who is interested in knowing all about me, I am not going to keep it from them forever, if fact I probably want to know sooner than later if he's not interested in the mind control I have experienced.

    When will a guy be interested in knowing about my JW past then? How do a gauge it?

    Kate xx

  • leaving_quietly
    leaving_quietly

    What exactly are new guys interested in?

    Need you ask this?

    Seriously, though, I would tell if you actually find a guy you could see yourself with longer-term. That means getting to know him a little bit, too, but definitely not a first date sort of thing.

  • Finkelstein
    Finkelstein

    Is dating multiple guys ethical?

    Sometimes doing so helps locating that special someone who is special to you.

    .... But be discreet

  • bigmac
    bigmac

    remind me Kate--you are in the UK ?

    ive got several girlfriends on dating sites--like fish. they all say the same thing--the majority of guys on dating sites in the UK are married players looking for NSA sex. but they dont say it up front. ( except on "special interest " groups like fab swingers. ) the last thing they want to discuss is religion.

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    Need you ask this? - LQ

    I don't know how old you are, but a guy taking me for coffee at 10am in the morning is interested in more than just sex, I am sure of it. I have chatted with him a bit on the site, but he was bold enough and confident enough to ask me out. I like that in a man.

    .... But be discreet -Fink

    Ahh a new guy will be turned off by a possible slapper, not more determind to get to know her. I see perfectly.

    Thanks guys. I would especially like advice from guys in my age range as well. But I think I have my answer. JW past is not first date information. Kate xx

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    Yeah I am in the uk, big mac.

    I am upfront about not wanting one night stands, and I'm 40, I know what that looks like, and to be fair I don't really mind being single for a while so I don't think I'll fall for any players. I have you guys to weed them out anyway.

    Who knows in the future I might want some no strings sex, but thats not me for now.

    Kate xx

  • bigmac
    bigmac

    for what its worth--i found my future partner through a dating site. and i'm going to a wedding reception next weekend--another female friend i met on a site--who met her hubby on the same site.

  • MadGiant
    MadGiant

    Don't try to hide who you are. Deception is a terrible foundation upon which to build a relationship.

    BBBUUUTTT, being true to yourself doesn't mean putting absolutely everything out there right away. Being honest doesn't mean reenacting your life story to everyone you meet. Be aware of your gut reactions and feelings as you go through the process, the gay/gal could be a creep.

    and I have no idea.

    Ismael

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