What is the JW Mindset?

by losingit 35 Replies latest jw experiences

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  losingit

  Is it based on gullibility, naivete, the ability to suspend all logic and reason in order to hold onto fantasized "realities" of a Paradise Earth where all humanity will be perfect, where all wars and violence will cease?

  Is it a personal preponderance to the extreme-- whether it be in judgmentalism, cruelty, rigidity, negativity, and/ or righteousness that lends itself to extreme closemindedness and shortsightedness?

  How do you define it for yourself? What characteristics are you working hard to let go of in order to overcome your JW past?

  Personally, what led me to become a JW was my extreme desire for Paradise Earth. I fell hook, line, and sinker for their vision of a perfect humanity-- UTOPIA finally achieved!!! In the beginning I hated the idea of billions being destroyed, so much so that I had nightmares. I comforted myself with the thought that "Jehovah" is an all-knowing God and the reader of our hearts. He would surely allow many billions to survive as a God of mercy and love. That was how I reasoned and survived as a Witness.

  But I also tend to be very negative that it affects my vision for the future. Everything has a negative side. A JW would look experience a peaceful beautiful day and say, "I can't wait to enjoy this in Paradise," or, "This is what Paradise will be like," instead of basking (Spelling?) in the rays of sunlight and the power of nature, letting it seep into their system to reenergize them. They reject all that for a fantasized Paradise Earth and focus on the tidbits of news signaling the end of the world. That mindset affected me so much that I eventually had to stop watching local and national news. It was all just too much............ I am letting go of the negativity and choosing to hope in the good of humanity.

  I also, to an extent, enjoyed the "protection" that the congregation provided. I was surrounded by God-loving people. I didn't have to work hard to find them and to cultivate friendships with them. The perfect community was right there in front of me. It was easy. I didn't have to feel awkward or work very hard................ I am letting go of my closemindedness. I am letting go of my judgmentalism so that I can form relationships with people that also have good hearts.

  JWs tend to point the fingers at others. Personal examination is not one of their better qualities. Too many people I knew as JWs were lazy in terms of personal improvement............ I am letting go of blaming others for my past. I am letting go of judging myself too harshly. I am looking into the mirror, being honest about myself, with the goal of creating a better future for me and my girls.

  JWs can also be very selfish. Their own personal survival is at hand, damn all others who could possibly jeopardize that! I can't say that I was selfish in that regard, but for the past year or so I have been selfish in crying about my past, all of the wasted time as a JW. I let that thinking intervene at times in my ability to care for my girls as I struggled with my circumstances. I believe I acted on that JW quality for too long.... I am letting go of my shortsightedness and focusing on my girls.

  What is the JW mindset? What characteristics did you possess as a JW? What are you working hard to let go of, and why?
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  NAVYTOWN

  To me the main thing about the JW Mindset is the complete lack of original thinking and logic. The brochures picture 'Paradise Earth' as being filled with happy people eating baskets of fruit. As a perfect example of how the Witnesses totally deny reality, try asking them: 'Will people still need to pee and poop in Paradise?? If so, who will be taking care of waste disposal?? Will THEY consider it 'paradise'??? No doubt they will give a vague answer such as: 'Oh, Jehovah will take care of that problem.' Which is exactly what they are programmed to say when asked any question that requires original, logical thinking.
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  losingit

  That's true Navytown , Paradise quckly gets lost once you start asking detailed questions that may even seem insignificant. Just forget critical thinking completely -- youre a Jdub now!
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  LostGeneration

  I think the JW mind is influenced and conditioned by fear and greed.

  All of the paradise stuff is pure and simple greed. Its all about getting anything and everything that the JW wants, but cannot have right now. Its all hung out there for them in pretty pictures and in their minds' eye. I really think that 95% of them don't really consider the massive slaughter that will have to occur before they get their own personal petting zoo and endless fruit platters. It reaches to one of the most appealing ideas a human can have, that of getting something for nothing.

  The fear part is made up of several components, some are very small - keeping the JW in line from day to day. These might be fear of getting caught doing something small by a family or congregation member, and being hauled into the back room. Putting down a small number on their FS report, and being thought of badly by the elders. Buying the wrong type of car for FS and being judged.

  Up a notch is the real fear of being kicked out, DFd for a more serious sin. This leads to cover ups, lying, etc.

  And then of course the WT uses the big stick, fear of getting killed by Jah at the big A. How horrible if you are killed off while your friends and family make it through.

  I think the combination of these fears short-circuit any sort of questioning or reasoning on JW doctrines and behavior within seconds of it entering the mind.
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  Oubliette

  --

  Listen, Obey and (allow yourself to be fooled into believing that you'll) be Blessed (for your naive gullibility)!
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  Oubliette

  If we are serious about attempting to accurately identify and describe a "JW Mindset," then I think it would be helpful to list the characteristics of most/any/all typical cult members and then differentiate the things that are unique to JWs.

  It would also be important to exclude negative behaviors that are common among the general population, even among people that have never associated or belonged to any authoritarian religion, especially other cults.

  I suspect that, if we are rigorous in doing this, we will find that there is actually very little that can legitmately be called "The JW Mindset" that wouldn't also describe many other dysfunctional human behaviors.

  Of course, it is so much easier to simply label any current or ex-JW that's being an asshole by saying, "You're acting like a JW!"

  - -
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  wanderlust

  Losingit, it takes a great deal of hard work and courage to do the type of introspection that you did upon leaving the JWs. I applaud you for that!

  Upon looking back on my JW youth, the thing that bothered me for such a long time, and still does on occasion, is my own intellectual laziness. I’m embarrassed by it. When the answers are right there in black and white for you to underline and/or highlight, it is difficult to train yourself to think critically, especially when you aren’t even aware that critical thinking is a skill that you are missing. I think of how much better I could have done in school, including college, if I could have developed this skill more. I also think of how much better/smarter I could be today. So my challenge has been to forgive myself and leave the past behind, and to continue to strive to be a better person and to learn as much as I can about myself and the world.

  Additionally, I remember being very pessimistic. I recall being in field service car groups and we would always talk about something awful that we heard about on the news. I guess it was part of the “looking forward to paradise” talk, but I don’t wonder why later I became deeply depressed. It was partially from my ex that I learned to be more of a realist and less of a pessimist. Now I would say, if the three were on a spectrum with pessimism to the far left, realism in the middle, and optimism on the far right, I am more often than not, just to the right of realism. If anything, I find myself sometimes too far to the right of realism and have to dial it back down. I don’t find myself too often on the pessimism end, which has done wonders for my mental health.
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  Oubliette

  losingit, I appreciate your recounting the incredible amount of self-deception involved in coming to accept and believe (or at least pretend to believe because you so hope they're really true) JW doctrines and WT "theology."

  I'm guessing from your OP you were a convert and not a "born-in" JW. I can identify your description of becoming a JW because you perfectly described the process of how it happened to me in my early- mid-twenties.

  I'm wondering how it is for those among us that were raised as JWs? It is probably similar in some ways, but in others I'm sure (from conversations I've had with many ex-JWs both here and in the real world) that it is also a very different process.

  One big part of successfully being a JW is the thought of unity to the organization at the complete expense, sacrifice and denial of the individuality of the person.

  While this is a key part of being a JW, it is also typical of any member of any high-control, authoritarian group, be it relgious, political or otherwise.
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  losingit

  Lost Generation-- so when a JW learns TTATT, must they let go of their "fear" and "greed"?

  Is it greedy to want to live in a Paradise earth? I think JWs don't want to think about what their belief system both directly and indirectly says about the fate of billions of non-worshippers. I know I worked hard to push it to the side and to be able to explain to my oldest how salvation really worked. I looked to Jesus' example to be able to do this, but I cannot say that most JWs do this. How do you work on letting go of this greed, to have everything handed over to you? Are JWs therefore lazy? Does it take a strong work ethic to successfully leave the JWs? I don't know..., just wanted to hear you flesh these thoughts out.

  As far as fear-- I think JWs fall into that pattern of fear of man because it is easy to be led by others than to think for yourself. It just does not require that much courage or effort, really, to rely on everyone else's opinions to shape your life. What must a ex-jw do to improve upon this?

  Oubliette-- I don't have much experience with other cults, thank goodness, LOL. And I haven't done much research into other cults besides reading Steve Hassan's first book. Could you share what qualities JWs and other cult members possess? Has there been a study done that helps identify what these characteristics are? Maybe someone out on the forum knows...

  Wanderlust-- intellectual laziness and pessimism... YES!!! OMG, don't you dare research or think for yourself or outside of the box! JW belief system really does require laziness. Why look anywhere else when the answers are right there? I was the type that did extra research, but only in the literature. Funny, tho, that once I started grad school I could tear the study articles apart, the talks apart, I could identify the crap that was being spewed, and I wasn't doing research into the Bible. Just using my BRAIN!
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  Oubliette

  losingit, What characteristics are you working hard to let go of in order to overcome your JW past? What are you working hard to let go of, and why?

  There are mainly only a couple of things I needed to work on:

  • A self-righteous, judgmental world view - I'm naturally arrogant and being a JW didn't help! ... lol
  • The very mistaken idea that I had "The Truth" and anyone outside of the organization did not - see above

  While I was a JW, it was always very difficult for me to suppress my true, authentic identity to put on the so-called "new personality," which in reality is a veneer of a real person, but simply a facade: a fake, superficial imitation of the WT's fantasy image of a "christian/worshipper of Jehovah."

  Once I left the confining pressure to conform that is the pressure-cooker known as "the congregation," it was easy to be me. The restraints were gone.

  In fact, I would really love to be an Ex-ex-JW. I would like for this all to be far back in my rearview mirror. The only reason I stay connected as much as I do (which is mostly through this board) is for the purpose of reaching my children still stuck in this cult. I want to know what's going on with the religion. I also want to understand the motivations of people that leave and those that stay, particularly "born-ins" so I can better understand possible strategies to rescue my kids.

  I also enjoy using the forum as a mirror to better understand myself and my "spiritual progress" and emotional and intellectual growth as it relates to my years as a cult member.

  Finally, it is good to help others just waking up and leaving! Revenge is sweet, saith Oubliette!