Dinosaurs on Noahs Ark?? Watchtower 1973 says..YES!! Bethelite with no College education

by Witness 007 13 Replies latest watchtower scandals

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    How did Noah or (Russell Crowe) fit all the animals on the Ark? How about throwing on the DINOSAURS as well!!!

    Watchtower 1973 july 15p.7 Question from readers. "When did the dinosaurs become extinct? (Notice this College educated answer) They may have disapeared DURING the flood of Noahs day. Not all of them were of gigantic size. Even if they survived till the flood this would not have required taking pairs of Mammoth verieties INTO the Ark. Other smaller members of a part family kind to which they belong would have sufficed to furfill the devine command..."

    Worse Question from readers EVER!! Read a science book forJehovah's sakes!

  • AndDontCallMeShirley
    AndDontCallMeShirley

    w73 7/15 p. 447 Questions From Readers Watchtower

    Alleged Questions from Readers but really from very bored men in the Writing Department

    When did God create unicorns and fairies, and when did they become extinct? — U.S.A.

    The Bible does not provide specific answers to this question but we will offer our uneducated opinion as truth from god. According to the Genesis account, unicorns and fairies were created during the fifth and sixth creative periods or ‘days’/120 and 144 hours respectively. If the Hebrew expression translated "great horned horsies and fairies" [Hebrew, horsey hornicus and fairicus dusticus ] includes unicorns and fairies , which often inhabited swampy, watery areas or bird houses, this would mean that unicorns and fairies were created on the fifth "day"/120 hours after the creation of everything else. (Gen. 1:21) We do not know but we will speculate anyway whether they continued to exist until man was created (toward the close of the sixth "day"/144 hours after the creation of everything else). At the very latest it seems likely ("evidently") that they must have disappeared off the earth at the time of the flood of Russell Crowe’s day. unicorns are great swimmers and fairies can fly, and some kinds of unicorns bear strong resemblance structurally and otherwise to waterhorses (horsey speedo-icus is, in fact, the Greek word for "horse in ridiculously small swimwear"; bulgicus junkis disgustingcus in Leviticus 11:29, LXX). Not all types of unicorns or fairies were of such gigantic size. Some fairies are the size of house flies. Hence, even if they had survived till Russell Crowe, this would not have required taking pairs of the mammoth varieties into the ark, as the ark was already full to capacity with kangaroos. Other smaller members of the particular family or "kind" to which these belonged would have sufficed to tell the ridiculous story of Bronze Age goat herders. — Gen. 6:19, 20; 7:14.

    Some of the older translations (inferior to the NWT Revised NWT) of the Bible at times use the word "dragons" to translate the Hebrew tan·ni·nim

    ("sea monsters," NW). (Ps. 74:13; 148:7; Isa. 27:1, Authorized Version) The term "dragon" (Greek, dra ′ kon ) is found in the Christian Greek Scriptures. It has been suggested as possible that, rather than having a purely mythical source, this expression may originally have been applied to enormous creatures such as really big, really scary real dragons, taking on mythical tones only after these mammoth creatures had long disappeared after being killed by Lancelot. Interestingly, many of the mythical depictions of the "dragon" strongly resemble certain types within the family of huge reptilian creatures in Steven Spielberg's "Jurassic Park" movie that includes the dinosaur and some pumped up unicorns on steroids".

  • westiebilly11
    westiebilly11

    ..I'm actually laughing out loud at the previous post!..very funny..!!..love this..!

  • Iown Mylife
    Iown Mylife

    ADCMS, your scholarly research is much appreciated. Also much appreciated are the huge laughs to get my day started, once again! You deserve the JWN Comedy Award for helping XJWs live longer through laughing their heads off.

    Marina

  • Heaven
    Heaven

    LOL @ ADCMS!

    Poor Dinosaurs. Why God, Why?!. t! IN (3: 39 DIDN' T LIKE THEM. ouch

  • redvip2000
    redvip2000

    Even if they survived till the flood this would not have required taking pairs of Mammoth verieties INTO the Ark. Other smaller members of a part family kind to which they belong would have sufficed to furfill the devine command..."

    Ahh yes. Good ol' Watchtower logic. A pathetic attempt at trying to justify why Jehoober wouldn't tell Noah to build an ark big enough for the dinosaurs.

    Other smaller members of a part family kind to which they belong would have sufficed to furfill the devine command..."

    What does this even mean?

  • sd-7
    sd-7

    Other smaller members of a part family kind to which they belong would have sufficed to furfill the devine command..."

    What does this even mean?

    Hmm. Pterodactyl not working out? Just go with some turtle doves--they're part of the 'kind' of animal that flies. Tyrannosaurus can't fit? No biggie. Ostriches have two legs, and lions are carnivores, so...close enough to the 'kind'...

    --sd-7

  • sir82
    sir82

    A pathetic attempt at trying to justify why Jehoober wouldn't tell Noah to build an ark big enough for the dinosaurs.

    LOL.

    A wooden vessel with the dimensions specified, and no steering mechanism, would rip apart into pieces within minutes if not seconds of being in floodwaters.

    An even bigger ark would disintegrate that much sooner.

    http://skeptoid.com/episodes/4279

  • redvip2000
    redvip2000

    A wooden vessel with the dimensions specified, and no steering mechanism, would rip apart into pieces within minutes if not seconds of being in floodwaters.

    O Ye of lil faith. Don't you know that Jehoober would keep it afloat. If Jehoober can't fly polar bears and buffalo over oceans to get to the middle east, he certainly can keep a box afloat. We know this because the Watchtower says so.

  • sir82
    sir82

    Thats always the thing that I could never figure out.

    If Jehovah miraculously tamed the aniimals so they would march into the ark, and miraculously got the kangaroos over from Australia & the polar bears from the Arctic, and miraculously kept the vesel intact, and miraculously kept their food from spoiling over the course of the year, and miraculously got a pair of beetle "kinds" to rapidly evolve into 300,000 species within a few decades after the flood, and miraculously this and miraculously that....

    Why not just do one more miracle and send a pink flying carpet down to pick up Noah & the rest? Or why not just "neutron bomb" the baddies and the nephilim?

    I tell ya, when I get around to writing my own holy scriptures, you can bet I'm going to spend the extra couple of bucks & hire a continuity editor.

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