Tonight my brother went to meet with the elders. My mom sent me a text with a frowny-face attached. Sky is going to see the elders :(
I don't know why, but it caused all this anger to well up inside of me.
Actually, I do know why. A few months ago, I was the one who had to go meet with the elders. I was publicly reproved. The anxiety and guilt I went through- I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I don't even desire to be a Jehovah's Witness any longer and yet- due to my pre-18 status- I didn't really have a choice. I could only promise the elders that I wouldn't shatter the laws of Jehovah any longer, and the words were like vinegar spewing from my mouth.
It's all taken so seriously in the JW cult. Every little thing contributes to a grand fate that appears to be just moments away. Armageddon is this looming presence, as you say- disfellowshipping means death. And my brother doesn't quite have the luxury of being free of WT doctrine, so I know that he's probably crying in his car, contemplating his own fiery death.
It just makes me so... angry.