In the past few weeks, my wife has been seeing more and more the lack of love and caring from JWs. For example, she is organizing a "princess party" for our 4 year old daughter. A couple of the parents have expressed reservations about this since they think princesses may be "too magical" even though we know they have been to Disneyworld, and watch the Disney Channel. She wanted it to be a costume party but a couple parents said they would send their kids, but wouldnt let them dress up. This has exasperated and fustrated her. She said that witness kids have it hard enough as it is, and these parents are trying to make it harder, and this is why so many kids leave "the truth". She agreed that you feel like you are walking on eggshells around other JWs because they are so very easily stumbled.
She also sees a lack of love and concern from the elders and most JWs at the KH. She sees that the only time the elders speak to her is when they want her field service time, or want her to give a talk on the school. Otherwise she gets ignored. She says she feels like some of the elders stare her down like they are scrtinizing her. We both agreed that JWs are wierder and more more oversensitive and judgemental than the average non JW.
I stay quiet and listen when she opens up to me like this, and all I can think to say is how it is scary how there is no real closeness or friendships at the KH and all the backbiting, cliches, and gossip, even by elders about the sheep is scary in light of Jesus words about how to reognize his true followers.
John 13:35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
and
Matthew 7: 16-19 By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17 Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. 18 A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. 19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. 20 Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.
This is all I can think of to say. It seems she thought about it. I said that it is interesting that Jesus did not say that you will be able to recognize my disciples if they go door to door, or if they have accurate doctrine, no he said love is the mark.
She says that she does not go to the KH for any man, but for Jehovah because she knows it is where she needs to be. ("my words" even if it is discouraging and miserable)
It is progress, and I know many learned TTATT by first seeing the widespread lack of love. It gives me hope.
Anyone have any other Ideas how to help a JW who sees the lack of love but still believes in everything JW and indoctrinated to open their eyes a little further?