Coping whilst stuck in the org. (page 2)

KateWild

I heard about the clapping game. I thought this was funny, you need to be brave though. Start clapping for something that they wouldn't normally clap for, and see if the rest of the cong follow, or a little easier is to keep the clapping going when it starts to fade off, keep going as long as you can, get some friends to join in and do it at assemblies too.

This is a really childish and silly game. The reality of your situation is that it is making you feel sick. This is common, listen to your body, you don't want to make yourself ill. I was at meetings, feeling sick doing what I had to do for family, but it was too much. I had to leave, I couldn't keep up the facade.

Do what you gotta do to look after your health

Kate xx

millie210

I love that you love your wife so much goingthruthemotions!

As for me, I skip as many meetings as I can figure out how to. I keep a really low profile.

I too play the game of sitting there wondering who else is in my position.

I know some who are because they follow me when I go outside. I first started going out to warm up - the Hall is kept very cold. But I have found there is a LOT going on outside I have found.

People with babies. People who just dont want to be inside etc.....

So some good conversations have been had. One man...very well read, his wife is a Bible Study who is "progressing". He is trying to slow her down. We had a good convo about Bible prophecy and 607. He talked, I listened.

Another brother, good heart, has tremendous family problems....talked about how hard the Org makes it to handle family problems. "They tie your hands"

I must look very open? Approachable? Sympathetic?

I dont know.

I do know the parking lot is MUCH more spiritual minded and upbuilding than the inside of the building!

Justnowout

The clapping game is huge (if childish) fun but only works at assemblies. The only oportunity at local meetings is after the public talk which gets claps anyway, but whats important is to find things YOU think are fun and that help keep you sane :) it can be done. Just remember: there is no spoon. Its all crap and a game. You can and will find peace with it eventually.

OneEyedJoe

While it doesn't really help you, please be aware that MANY of us are in your exact position!

I don't know about the OP, but this does help me tremendously. Being the only person in a room of 60-70 that realizes it's a cult is an extreemly lonely feeling sometimes, but knowing that there are dozens on this site, and likely tens of thousands out there who are with you in spirit is a powerful bit of knowledge.

If you don't have a tablet, get one. I've got a running document that I keep all my research in (i.e. WT articles where they flip-flop on organ transplants, etc) and I update it during the WT study when something useful comes along. I look for things that I can twist to my advantage (like the WT study a while ago where it said to reject unscriptural teachings regardless of the source) and I look for logical fallacies (they're everywhere!) and other bits of proof that this is not "god's organization." Everyone around will just think you're taking notes.

I also like to read/post on JWN while I'm running the microphones. Keeps you sane and innoculated from the propaganda while at the same time giving you a healthy dose of adrenaline at the possibility of getting caught.

I do the same thing as Justnowout with the songs, except I usually change the lyrics to things that are somewhat more vulgar.

During prayers, I never close my eyes and bow my head (unless I'm falling asleep) but instead I usually look around for other people doing the same and wonder if they're awake. There's a couple kids in the hall that seem like they might have a head on their shoulders, and they seem like they may be waking up too, so that's always encouraging to see.

In general, try not to participate in any communal activities (singing and bowing your head for prayer are the most obvious ones) as this participation will trigger an unconscioius psychological effect (a form of cognitive dissonance) that will make you sympathize with the JWs more. While there's probably little chance that you'll get sucked into believing that it's "the truth" again, it will help you keep a clear and objective mind and stay focused on what's important - getting out.

Justnowout

Good catch on the prayer Joe! I forgot that one but i too refuse to bow my head or utter an "amen". i used to sing various song lyrics but i find more joy in changing their gods name to mine and praising my (make believe) god with their song of praise to their make believe god ;)

bigmac

it really sickens me when I sit through the meetings. I am so tired of faking things. I feel like vomiting

go for it----pick a word or phrase that hits the spot--then really try to honk up. run out to the washroom holding your mouth---make a loud gagging noise when you get there.

then--repeat each time you hear the same words. you will soon get--noticed. who knows--you might get " invited" NOT to attend meetings any more

bigmac

I laugh about it. I have a plan...

going back a lifetime---in the kH i attended was a bruv---not the sharpest tool---who often laughed out loud at things said from the platform. whenever i gave talks--i would look at him--and say something that would set him off--it was uncontrollable--and infectious. soon others would start too.

so--laugh out loud at something that seems amusing--overdo it--see what ensues.

leaving_quietly

Depend on what YOU want. For me, searching for truth, WHEREEVER IT LEADS, is important. That means lots of research, copious notes, etc. I tend to listen way, way more intently at meetings. It become super easy to pick up on untruth. But, there are things that I just don't know, so I make a note of it and it becomes a topic of research for myself.

crazyhorse

Big thanks guys!! Ill do these at the district convention. You know, its really surprising how non-jws have some weird perceptions about JWs and active JWs dont even know they believe in strange cultic beliefs.

tornapart

I've just gradually let go of everything. I go out 1 hour FS a month to keep under the radar (they are RVs I've had for years that are going nowhere). I go to a meeting maybe once a month just to show my face and keep in touch with the few I like. Family have just got used to it now. They know how I feel which makes it easier. The elders and CO know I have my 'doubts' but that I don't want to talk about it. All in all I've found a relatively comfortable place to be under the circumstances.

Coping whilst stuck in the org.

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