New ExJW here for the first time.

WideAwake7

I am here for the first time ...but have enjoyed reading others experiences that I feel I can relate too. I used to be an elder for more than 20 years . I have successfully faded with my wife and children. It took more than 3 years to do this ... But like most it was hard! I still have contact with my Mom and Father in Law both more than 50 years in the Borg. But my sister does not talk to me for more than 2 years.

I have gone through the different phases like paranoia , dissolution , depression , anger and regret.But have now reached with my wife and children a inner peace and finally true HAPPINESS. I am nervous here but I am finally going to tell my story in time. Its a good one ! ....a real good one!

I have a question to ask ..my family and I are going to wedding of a JW family . A family that we grew up with and are dear with.But WOW,! We will finally see all these brothers and sisters we knew for decades. They all know we have been inactive and not going to the meetings for the past few years. It's just wierd !

Has anyone gone through this similar situation ?... What can my wife and children who are now young adults expect.?

OnTheWayOut

Welcome. I look forward to your story. It's a mixed bag with JW's seeing you after awhile when they know you are no longer one of them, but technically not kicked out. They typically just steer clear, don't actively seek you out, but don't tend to shun when forced to say "Hey." Others report the opposite of some of that. Don't admit anything that could get you in hot water. Just say anything like "I'm not here to discuss that."

humbled

Well, hello, WideAwake7.

Others may know what to expect--but the scenario you describe for this wedding is nothing I've dealt with-

Good work on your family fade!

Divergent

Walk in with your heads held high as a happy family. Make them envious of you & your family. Talk enthusiastically to those who talk to you, emphasizing how great life has been for you & your family. If anyone tries to ignore you for whatever reason, do not shy away but greet them anyway & make them feel uncomfortable In short, make them jealous. That is the best advice I can think of

breakfast of champions

Welcome!

I'm not sure what you can expect, but if you can talk to an individual's real self and not their cult self - talking about family, sports, recreation, hobbies, etc - they are usually quite laid back.

As far as if anyone corners and tries to "interrogate" you, a Big Smile and say "I'm sorry but I'd prefer not to discuss that right now."

Blackfalcon98

Welcome to the forum! (Good to know Im not the newest member on here anymore......people are waking up everyday! Im currently in a position where Im preparing to fade....but congrats on getting out with your immediate family in-tact! Looking forward to hearing your experiences!

BLackfalcon98

AlphaMan

Welcome to the forum. Good advise here. Just be out going, confident, and look proud & happy. If any uber-dubs try to interrogate you just tell them this is a happy wedding iccasion and it's in pour taste to talk shop.

LisaRose

Welcome, glad to hear of your successful fade, I look forward to hearing your story.

I have been out too long to know what you cam expect, but from what others have Said, expect the cold shoulder.

Magnum

Please tell your story very soon. I'm especially interested in elders that wake up. What it is that woke you up? Was it one particular thing that bothered you at first? A number of things? What??? Don't keep us waiting too long.

As to your question, I haven't experienced anything like that, so I don't know what you and your wife and children can expect, but I say to just be yourselves. You say you've found happiness, so show it. DO NOT act apologetic or as if you're weak.

happy@last

Welcome here, and congratulations on a successful fade. All the best to you and yours. At the wedding you will most likely find some will love bomb you while others will avoid eye contact. It's actually quite surreal, keep your sense of humour about it.

New ExJW here for the first time.

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