New ExJW here for the first time. (page 3)

cantleave

I would hate to attend any JW event now, the cult speak would make me want to vomit.

cofty

Welcome. I look forward to hearing more of your story when you are ready.

It's great that your family are all out too.

Hey welcome WideAwake7. We had a sort of similar situation this year, its was just before me and my husband finally left the org. We were invited to a wedding of one of my childhood friends who my family had known for years, my brother who left in his late teens was also invited as he and the groom had been extremely good friends when they were growing up.

My brother wasn't sure whether to go as the last time he had been in a KH was my own wedding 8 years ago, in the end he decided he should as they had obviously made the effort to include him when most witnesses wouldn't bother. Basically we went and everyone was lovely to him, nobody ignored him and he said he felt very comfortable. The worrying thing though he said was that when he was in the KH he said it felt like the most natural thing in the world for him to be and that it seemed "normal" to be there! This coming for an atheist!

I think people were genuinly pleased to see him as it was our group of old friends but I also think that they were hopeful that this wedding might bring him back. I had made quite clear beforehand to some who mentioned it that it would def not do that, and it didn't! But in general he had a really good time and wasn't made to feel awkward with pressure to return etc. None of them know yet that we have stopped going too now :/ not sure how to deal with that one........

I think as these people are your genuine friends and obviously really want you be at their wedding, I wouldn't worry about what other people think or say, as it's a wedding im sure they will just want things to go smoothly for the bride and groom. I expect you will get "lovebombed" quite heavily but would imagine conversation wont get much deeper than "oh its so lovely to see you, how have you been?" etc. At wedding's even witnesess are more relaxed, especially if alcohol is involved! I find hanging out with any non-JW family that may attend is a good way to ensure you have a good time! We had some on our table who were a real laugh.

Anyway i hope you have a good time and look forward to hearing your story.

FF x

outforever

Welcome welcome - like the others on this site - I am also interested in an elder leaving: and leaving with his wife.

What can you expect when you are to the wedding. I think they will greet you but they will not ask you anything - they are too scared! so they will talk about the weather / sports / etc: so enjoy the food and drink!

mrquik

Congrats WA7; I too, was an elder. Had 50 yrs. in. Remarried the love of my life. Enjoy every day. Live Well....Enjoy Life !!!

3rdgen

Welcome WideAwake7, Congratulations on getting yourself and your family out! Balaamsass is my husband. We have found in social situations that the witnesses who you liked and liked you will be warm and friendly. The ones that are self-rightous or annoying tend to be the ones who want to hear how miserable you are since you left the "troof" These are the ones you want to ask embarassing questions about them or their family. Example: Hows Susie? Is she still living with that guy? How's your wife? Is she still suffering from depression? How's the So and Sos (a JW couple involved in a scandal) are they still married? I heard she took off with that pioneer guy. etc etc. Make THEM uncomfortable and YOU have a great time!

Gustv Cintrn

Hi,

Welcome to this most colorful online folks.

I have been at plenty of gatherings where non-practicing JWs have attended. I have been polite to them all the time there; reasonable, moderate JWs will be polite, not overly friendly of inclusive, but definitely polite. The orthodox ones will make you feel shunned and unwelcomed. Just gravitate towards the polite ones and you will be alright. Enjoy the occasion!

GC

jemba

Welcome WA7!! So happy for you. We both got out together with the kids. Such a wonderful relief isnt it.

joe134cd

I can't help but think how different apostates are to the ideas that are drummed up the literature. When i was indoctrinated my idea of an apostate was a person who had resorted to mud slinging due to been kicked out as an unrepentant sinner. Yet in reality they can be the very ones been invited to witness gatherings.

Still Totally ADD

Welcome WideAwake7 to the light side. Looking forward to your story. I too was a elder for 25 years and have many stories to tell. If you want to talk just give me a PM. As far as the wedding, be strong and firm with your convictions. Good luck to you. Still Totally ADD

New ExJW here for the first time.