Help, my son misses the hall...

termite 35

He really does.
We had a long chat tonight and he was really sad.We were never integrated into jw society,so it's not the people;he justsaid ...'want to belong to god's family'?!I went through a few more points as to why the wtbs wer'nt the 'right' religion and asked him if he felt god was happy with people who lie.He re-accepted that and then said'So,how do you know where to go?I tried to explain it by asking him if he thought god looked at congregations or individuals and we got to the conclusion that it's probably individuals...

My point is, he wants to go to his teachers church,and I don't.My husband has never been interested in religion in any form and as the months go by,I feel less and less inclined to be involved in any religion.He has a strong Christian theme at his school, but done nicely, so I know his desperation is,nt all 'my fault' But I feel guilty at making him so desperate to find the place he feels comfortable in.He's only 8 and an obsessed sports fan who has a very loving ,full life-but he's unhappy at night and i'm so worried it's my fault.I feel so depressed tonight and responsible for messing up his head with it all.The point is...

Do I take him to his teachers church even though I have no desire to?How long would I have to go, feeling a hypocrite?
What will it do to him if I don't try to help him practically with how he's feeling?
I can't just ignore the request,can I?
My daughter are older and not interested...HELPPPP!!!!?????

Dutchie

When we take children to the Kingdom Hall they sometimes, depending on age, become just as indoctrinated as we do. Additionally, some children are just more sensitive than others. You, however, are the parent. If you feel that these meetings are not something you want him involved with you should tell him so. Eventually, your son will respect your opinion. Have the heard the old adage "times heals..." Well, it applies in this case too. As time goes on the memories will fade and a year from now I bet you won't be able to drag him back to the hall!

Valis

Maybe you need to find out from him if any of his friends go to church and maybe see about a sleepover with them. When my children were here, as in Dallas, the 5 year old's best friend belonged to a Unitarian family, which I learned of prior to her sleepover invite. With some trepidation I relented and she went to her first sleepover, had a great time, and went to church with them. I don't think church was the highlite and at least when I saw her again she wasn't talking about the kingdom...Got that from going to hall w/grandma...ugh. Anyway, I hope my suggestion helps.

Sincerely,

District Overbeer

termite 35

Thanks for the comments Dutchie;but it's not the hall he wants to go back to now-it's his teachers church-lots of children enjoy sunday school etc-I don't want to belittle his needs and ignore them-if they make him unhappy I have to take them seriously-don't I ?
if I don't try to understand he has a need to find god SOMEWHERE how will he trust me to help him with his problems?
I don't just feel i can say, 'You want to go to a church?Tough!'

Just because my need is fading-dos'nt meen his feelings mirror mine...

ThiChi

There are a lot worse places he could want to go. As a free thinker, you can instill points and counter points as his life progresses though his search for the truth..........I say let him get it out of his system........

anglise

Hi Termite

are you saying that his teacher is a JW?

termite 35

Thanks Valis-that's a pretty good idea; a few friends at school go to some;perhaps it would satisfy him if he just went occasionally.Perhaps I could get his teacher to 'invite' him to her church,some close friends' parents are lovely,and that's theirs too;I'd just feel so false even being there at the moment.X

Valis

You know how kids are when they are together at church...whenever I had my friends over as a kid I couldn't wait to get out of the Kingdumb Hell and get on with my fun.

Sincerely,

District Overbeer

ballistic

Young minds are very impressionable. The brainwashing has already taken hold. I think it's important to replace the indoctrination with something. I'm just not sure what.

DannyBear

Termite,

Who knows he may find that the Sunday school offers more than the KH.

I talked to my lady (never a jw or member of a church), both of her parents were non-religious, they put her in a local baptist sunday school program, just to give her the opportunity to decide for herself.

She enjoyed all the association, outings, fun times with the other youth, but when it came time to become a member at around the age of 16...she left...none the worse for experience. She knows alot of bible stories, and can hold her own in conversations relating to religion, just based on that little exposure.

I would vote to let him get a taste of whatever religion he seems interested in, at 8yrs you start flexing a little independent muscel, he will thank you for being so open.

Not to mention he will probably bounce everything he learns off you for review. You sound very capable of keeping his head on straight.

Danny

Help, my son misses the hall...

Share this