Wow guys, this is really sad stuff. Sorry for those with such painful family experiences. None of mine were ever JWs, so no change for me in that regard.
That was a good idea to write your own "Disowning Letter." Evidently it had an impact. Pow!
I was intrigued by blondie's comment: "Elders may call on you once a year to see if you want to come back." Huh? I never had an elder call on me in 12 years, much less once a year. I guess the operative word in that sentence is "MAY call on you..." which, I am guessing, means they MAY IF THEY WANT TO...
Reminds me of the scripture about the leper:
"Lord if you JUST WANT TO, you can make me clean." And so, stretching out his hand, [Jesus] touched him saying, "I WANT TO. Be made clean." And immediately his leprosy was cleansed away." (Mat. 8:2,3).
Revised 20th Century Version: "Elder, if you JUST WANT TO, you can remove my DF'ing." And so, stretching out his bat, he bonged me on the head saying, "I DON'T WANT TO. You haven't sat in the back row for a year yet." And immediately I gave up on the idea. (Book of Grits, Chapter 12).
:-/