my ex is a witness and he has alienated my son from me. you see, his mother is not a good association but her molester step father is a witness in good standing and is a fine individual to associate with. I, on the other hand, have demons and therefore should be avoided. this is a battle i will wage my entire lifetime. hopefully he will see the light someday, but until then i have to consider this a loss and grieve it, as well as all my past "friends and relatives". it will always be somewhat of an open wound as the reminders are there (only 15 minutes away you say). not like as in death where there is a finality. this website, as well as jahchristian, helps keep me up to date of things that will help me in my goal of enlightening my son.
Deprogramming
by Perfection Seeker 18 Replies latest jw experiences
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Perfection Seeker
So sorry to hear about you being alienated from your son. (How old is he?) I know first hand this happens- I've seen it for the past 20 some years! What a life ahead of a child- I wouldn't go through it again for all the money in the world! The ONLY thing I can say in your husband defense- keep in mind I am an EX, and bitter, etc- but the ONE thing that helps comfort me, personally, is that they THINK they are doing what is right. They are doing what they THINK god wants. Sure, so does Osama & his clan- but if you look at the witnesses & feel sorry for them, and at least that they are TRYING to please god, helps a little, although not enough not to be bitter. My mother is so wrapped up- that if the society said to strap a bomb on your back- she'd be one of the first to do it at ALL costs. Sad. Very sad. Hopefully your son will see his way clear. Keep the doors open. Good luck!!
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NewWay
Hi, PerfectionSeeker. I've only recently joined this group. The last time I took part in any internet discussion/communication was back about four months ago, as I got to the point where I just did not want to be reminded of the organisation any more. I felt, why waste time dredging up the past, move on. It one thing if it is only you who is a JW and the rest of your family is not, but when you have family that are still involved with the organisation it is a different matter. At the moment all of the adults in my immediate family are involved with the organisation, and I have to be careful what I do (for more information about my experiences, please see the thread entitled: 'Why I Stopped Apologising For The Watchtower Society').
I have no friends outside of the organisation and virtually nil inside (because of my 'inactivity'). This web site is giving me opportunity to release some of the feelings I have kept inside for so long. Some here may think that based on the little time I've been here I've been over the top in the number and length of posts I've made. I do apologise, but it is so good to be able to share thoughts with people who know where I'm coming from. Why people keep coming to places like this, rather than simply just 'moving on' is I think because we are looking for like-minded people to share our feelings with. For many of us just jumping straight into the world and making new friends is virtually impossible, because even if we find a truly kind individual in 'the world' to confide in, they can never truly understand what we have been through. There are many support groups for different people: bereavement, victims of crime, the terminally ill, etc. People like to seek out those who have been in a similar situation as themselves for support.
Jan gave some very good advice, and I agree that some folk may need professional help. But for others, just having a regular dose of reasurance via places like this can have a very therapeutic and upbuilding effect. Being in a minority of several thousand is a lot better than being in the minority of one (which is what it sometimes feels like)!
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Double Edge
Here's a thread from the past that might be of some interest....I'll check out more and post them (if I find them)
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=26842&site=3
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bad_associashun
double edge,
LOTS of helpful, thought-provoking statements in those threads- big thanks to you!
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lady 45
this is my frist time postingon this site, and truly i am very happy to have found this site because it has really helped me to see so many diffent things that i would not have known about the Jw's
i am also an xjw, and noone could have told me the thingss that i have found out in the last 3 weeks on these site. so just keep reading and this is a deprogramming enough for me, and i do feel alot better about my self... thanks for this site and meeting all these very nice people here
lady 45
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Double Edge
Big Big Welcome Lady 45.....stay tuned....it only gets better.....Thanks for letting us know you're here. Feel free to tells us your story when it feels right (or not, whatever you're comfortable with)
Edited by - Double Edge on 27 June 2002 16:43:1
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lady 45
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WELCOMING ME, it feel so good to find you all so that i don't feel so alone, i now work with a jw here at work and it is like he don't have alot to do with me but i do understand it is just the way jw's are told not to deal with xjw only if it's related to work, i do understand?
i was disfellowship back in 1988, i was in love with a worldly man and we got marry plus we had sex before marriage i stoped going to the meeting after that because i was feeling so bad about what i had done, so it went on so long a sister gave me a call and she ask me if i wanted to talk to the brothers of cause i said yes? because it was so strong on my mine what I had done, in my mine I had done something so bad to my relationship with jehovah, i felt like i had died inside, oh well. i am still marry to this worldly man,12 years later and still in love,
about 4 years later i went back to the KH to talk to the brother and try to get my life in order with MYfather Jehovah, I went for months and i also wrote the repent letter,that you are ask to write I just did'tn understand why the brother never got around to telling me how i was doing or what, this is the very frist time i talked about this since then to think about it now hurts because it feels so unfair to be put down like nothing, i have to say that i did learn alot about the bible when i was studying and i had a very loving sister that study with me, she is still waiting on me to return to the truth,
that is my story, thanks so much for this site, i plan to do what i can to help keep it running
lady 45 from Va.