Double Standards

Perfection Seeker

Did anyone else have witness parents who the congregation thought were the "Model" family, yet behind closed doors all hell broke loose? I remember a time when my family was choosen to do a part at an assembly about the ideal family- yet behind the scenes, we were beat, yelled at, sworn at, never studied, had a family from hell, yet others always commented how "perfect" and christian our family was. Being a witness leaves deep & permanent scars. This website is like the "plastic surgeon" for me- already starting the healing process, yet enjoying the bitterness that I held in for 28 years!

eyegirl

omg, are you sure we're not related perfection? even though all three of us kids have left 'the truth' my mom is still in denial that we were the model family!! she finally admitted only 1 month ago to hitting my sister and knocking her to the ground the night she decided to 'leave'. too bad you don't live closer--i think scooter and i could make you an honorary sister. ((hugs))

beck

Edited by - eyegirl on 29 June 2002 1:20:46

Perfection Seeker

Want to meet halfway? :-) I am in Iowa- what state are you in? I think the double standards & behind closed doors was pretty much a given in the organization. What family could really truly live up to those standards all the time? My brother went to Bethel, he is now an elder, my other brother a servant, my dad was a servant- hard to "respect" them all knowing what I did. Course, I never did respect them :-) My ENTIRE family is at the district convention right now. I feel SO sorry for them- 8 hours- 3 days- I remember sitting there so tired & brain dead- watching the clock- and having it NEVER move- the ONLY thing that kept me awake was the constant clapping. How long were you "in"? I am so glad to be out. My gosh.

eyegirl

hey, i guess we're not that far--i live up by duluth. email me sometime and maybe we can figure out a time and place to meet. sounds like we would have alot to talk about.

beck

rmayer32

Amazing what a few phony smiles in public can make people think isn't it?

-Rick

not interested

I guess we all know familys like that it seem like there is always some one on ssembly parts that are talking out of the side of thier neck, its funny how at the assemblys the have to read thier experiences from que-cards instead of speaking from the heart but you know the brothers have to edit every thing so it sounds so peachy, I rember one one af thoes perfect family parts my father was actualy on stage giving our family experience i cant quote what he said exactily but it was somthing like this " my wife and i have 3 sons my oldest is a m/s and my youngest is a pioneer and a m/s and my middle son ....um ...well hes doing well. Gee thanks dad, i guess i shouldnt be hard on him as far as dads go hes probably one of the best

Edited by - not interested on 29 June 2002 2:44:24

terafera

Yea, I know about the fake facade put on at the Hall. Many times I had to cover my black eyes with eye shadow and have sisters tell me I wore too much makeup!!! I didnt have the nerve to tell them my aux pioneer mother did it to me. I think my damaged self esteem and soul showed through, more than anything. You would have to be in deep denial to not see how dysfunctional our family was.

avengers

I knew these things went on in families.

But it amazes me to finally see it's happening in a much larger scale than I ever thought it was.

I thought the problems were only happening in my family. I see now it's way worse than ever imaginable.

WOW

For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts

(king james version)

So who really is to blame?

bigfloppydog

This is a very good point, double standards in families, you just never know what goes on behind closed doors. I used to look at jw families and sort of put them on a pedestal, what a joke. I see now some of the up front double standards they have. It makes me sick to my stomach. Then when you see the doubles standards, you think, what hypocrites. That was part of the reason I left. I could go on and on and tell stories of many who had double standards in their home lives.

13th_apostate

I remember a family in cong whose mother was a terror but always had her two boys have parts in the ministry school and always was in service on the weekends. I spent some time with them when my mom had been studying for quite some time. it was the summer before freshman year in highschool. the mom screamed at them and whipped the oldest boy with a belt RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. he and his younger brother were truly embarassed. I couldn't believe that she had done that. after that I never really spent a lot of time with witness families outside of kingdom hall activities. too weird.

hey perfection, I live in iowa also. you aren't by chance in the northeastern part of the state are you?

will

Double Standards

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