Dear Violet,
You ask:
Am I really brainwashed from childhood, even tho I broke away for a few years and viewed them independantly
I can only answer you from my own experience, I too was raised as a witness and 'broke away' and analyzed the religion with what I believed to be unbiased eyes . . . problem was they were far from unbiased.
I thought I was doing well just reading the bible and trying to disprove the witnesses teachings, I was under the impression that this was an effective method. The conclusion I came to at that time was that their interpretation made more sense than other interpretations, the problem was my method STARTED from an undeniably biased assumption . . . the assumption that the 'truth' was in the bible to start with!!
A sincere search for truth can only start with no assumptions whatsoever, THATS the truth.
The only thing to prevent us from a sincere search is fear.
If we had been born in a muslim country our faith would be just as strong, and no less or more biased. We might struggle with the choice between a traditional interpretation vs. a more lenient one but in all probability that would be the limit of our search. The failure to search outside the basic belief system is rooted in a deep seated, long standing, and unquestioned assumption, and the fear of questioning something which we have been taught is unquestionable.
Fear of offending some all-powerful vengeful god. Fear of facing the trials and tribulations of our lives alone . . . fear of damnation. Few stop to realize that fear itself is damnation.
There is a scripture thats says something to the effect that god does not cause division, that satan does.. Violet, what does organized religion bring . . . worldwide division . . . or unity?
To really search for the truth one can start with NO ASSUMPTIONS WHATSOEVER, the search for truth is impossible when fear is present. Don't start searching with the assumption that this truth is, or is not, in any book or organization whatsoever.
raven101