My mommy doesn't want me. . I need a hug (page 4)

Vivamus

I'm sorry for you S.Pantz. Here is a big hug for you

((((((((((((((((((((((((SP))))))))))))))))))))))

And also one for all of you out there who are going through the same ((((((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))

sunshineToo

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{SP}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm sorry to hear that. ;-(

Have you tried to talk to her at least over the phone?

For my case when I talked to her over the phone, first she sounded like she was going to shun me. Then I cried like a baby. ;-) I asked her, "Mom, you're not going to even talked to me? But I love you so much, mom." and I sobbed more. I couldn't help myself. ;-( Then she said that she would be very disapointed. Notice that she didn't say that she was going to shun me. Next thing I knew, every Saturday I had to have dinner with the whole family. She insisted. She said that she is hoping I would change my mind someday.

My mom is the only JW in my family. Maybe that made my case easier. I don't know whether you are DF'd or DA'd, and since I wasn't DF'd due to my serious sin ( ;-p), even other JWs are willing to stay close to me.

Talk to her, SP. I believe there is a very special bond between mother and daughter ( I'm assuming you are a woman ). I think my mom was pressured or convinced ( at that time ) by other JWs in her congregation to be tough on me because I know there is NO WAY my mom is going to abandon me just like that. It might be the same with your mom, too. Someone or some people might have coached your mom how to respond to you. It is so easy to pretend through writing, but not when you are talking. ;-)

Give her a call today. I know a sister in our KH whose daughter got DF'd. According to other publishers, her daughter went "all the way" to be rebellious. But she still keeps in touch with her daughter. They even go out and have fun. Once she told me that they went out all night and had so much fun together. She also said that she knew some parents shun their DF'd or DA'd children, and that she would never do that. Her entire family is JW so you know what is like. I know she loves her daughter very much. I'm sure your mom loves you so much, too.

Good luck! ;-)

FreeFallin

((((((SP)))))

A mother's love is a precious thing. I hope she comes to her senses before it's too late.

Free

zenpunk

((((((StinkyPantz)))))). My mom doesn't want me either. ((((((Mutual Hug))))))

StinkyPantz

SunshineToo-

I did talk to her over the phone and I cried harder than I ever have before, but to no avail. My father is an elder and my brother an MS and she's very active. I just don't think there is much hope. But I put it all on her shoulders, I feel no regret. Plus I'm moving to Orlando and right now we live only a few blocks from her in Kansas. Maybe the distance will help to heal my pain.

Carmel

Stinky,

My thoughts and prayers go out to you! Since my family disowned me, I've had to make do without. It was difficult at first but the dysfunctional relationship I had with then was soon replaced with healthy friendships and others that were more friends to me than any of my family.

Regarding your emotional response to your mom, this is feeding her feeling of trying to influence your decisions. The sooner you can show detachment the sooner she will have to re-consider her approach to her. Right now, she's in control. It's your turn!

huggs, carmel

Sentinel

Stinky... ((((((((HUGS)))))))

It should never be like this. It's so unnatural. It's called "conditional love".

Do our mothers think this type of behavior is normal or healthy?

They can't listen to their own hearts. How sad. :-(

Karen

witchywoman

(((Stinky))) You sound like a lovely young lady. I am sorry to hear that your mother is causing you to be in so much pain. I am a mother, my daughter wanted nothing to do with me for nearly ten years, in the last two years things have gotten much better, she now communicates with me. I love her with all my heart. You sweet darling deserve no less.

I agree with Ashling and Carmel, you are going be stronger for this, for you must be strong. It is good for you to be able to get it out and let others know what you are dealing with.

Suggestion, try reading " Women Who Run With the Wolves" by Clarissa Pinkola Estes you may or may not like the style of the author. It is basically about a womans psyche, with a lot of symoblisms. The reason I mention this book is because there is a chapter about the woman or girl that must raise herself, and how she must rely on her own spirit to guidance, and for this reason she becomes a more deeply loving woman.

Much love to you. Hang in there honey, you are going to make it. You`ve got everyone here behind you.

witchywoman

Sabine

I'm so very sorry SP. I wish I could talk to parents like yours, show them a picture of my daughter and her suicide letter, and tell them how much I miss her every day....and they have a daughter that's alive and they just don't appreciate it!!! Makes me so angry.

Big hugs to you ((((SP)))) and know that you are worthy of loving parents, it's them that are not worth of you.

StinkyPantz

You all are wonderful!!!

My mommy doesn't want me. . I need a hug

Share this