I'm sorry that Satan had his way with you, Snare, but you've got to come up with a better story. If you are going to give Satan credit for your accident don't insult him with "I slipped on the grass." Come up with something exciting.
How about you were skydiving when your parachute failed to open all the way. A tree broke your fall and so you came out of it with only a fractured leg. There, that's better.
Wishing you a speedy recovery!