How do you manage to keep JW friendships after you left the organization? (page 2)

aintenoughwiskey

I have one left and one maybe, all the others have dropped me like a dog turd. The one left barely goes to meetings, and I'm his only friend. The other I've known all his life, and we connected while he was out, have a hobby in common. I felt sorry for him being alone with no friends. We had him over quite a bit, fed him, treated him like a son. He has since gone back and remarried, I'm happy for him, but I expect he will also drop me. A real shitty doctrine that shunning! My wife feels sorry for me, but like a lot of men, I'm comfortable in my own skin. I feel sorry for women who leave, they seem to make more social connections. Oh well, we still have our child, grand children, we both come from large families and have siblings. I had a JW friend want to friend me on FB, my first thought was why? I'm guessing it has something to do with the RC.

millie210

konceptual994 minutes agoThis was posted on an instagram account that is run by a JW locally
https://instagram.com/p/4PcLxeH4iV/?taken-by=stefleck_djmmx5_jw
It was as much as I could to not blow my cover and post a tirade about this being bollocks when talking about anyone who goes from being a Witness in "good standing" to one who has faded, no longer attends or is otherwise considered no longer in "good standing".
The irony of this statement is completely lost on the fawning commentators posting their crap about the org and true friendship.

Wow, that was rough to read....

When one of the flock bolts it sure stimulates the anxiety in the others doesnt it?

"I love you...I love YOU too.........I love you MORE...."

gag.

seriously. who talks that way???

well I do- but its to my puppy!

konceptual99

margsimpsonsbodydoubleI have an aunt who lives in the same town as me, actually within a twenty minute walk or five minute drive, but has never been to visit me in the eight years since I moved here. Contrast that with my friends in my congregation who would do anything to help me anytime day or night. True friends.

Until you decide that the idea of a global flood around 4000 years ago is stretching reality just a little.

konceptual99

superwomang10Very true!!! My only family it's the congregation..... I luv all my brothers & sisters

Until you decide that you will have a blood transfusion to avoid dying in child birth and depriving your family of a mother, wife and a new baby.

Iown Mylife

We haven't spoken to any jw friends in several years. They all dumped us when our meeting attendance became sporadic, after our ex-son in law began lying to everyone about how we mistreated him. They all believed him! After knowing us for 20-plus years, they believed him and never asked us about our side of things.

So, we kept NO friends from a huge chunk of our lives. It was very difficult for me, more than my husband. I had girlfriends that i talked to nearly every day for years and years, and then suddenly not one person to talk to.

That's why when i found this forum it helped me so much. It's not the same but helped me deprogram and validated my feelings and I learned a lot about the cult that i didn't know before.

We are doing really well now, we've opened a janitorial supply store and concentrating on collecting more money, less "friends," LOL!

Marina

done4good

A true friend is someone you can be your honest self with. If you try to be that true self after you leave JW, you will find out those friendships are conditional. It can be a hard pill to swallow.

FWIW, I still consider some JW true friends, however those relationships are dormant at the moment because I will not compromise my self honesty. If they ever leave themselves someday, they will thank me for that.

d4g

Ucantnome

with difficulty

wisdomfrombelow

It is more difficult because I am disfellowshipped but I was surprised to keep a few active JW friends. They are close friends and real friends and I am thankful for that. They know that they can have consequences for associating with me but they accept that risk. I think many friendships are based on proximity but I find that living some distance away makes it much easier because I'm not in their congregation. My real friends accept me for who I am even if they don't agree with my choices and that is what makes them a real friend...not so much what religion they belong to.

Divergent

Most of those I am on good terms with are from other congs who don't know that I'm fading. For some reason, I tend to get along better with those from other congs rather than my own!

In my cong of around 100 people, I can only view one as a good friend! The rest are merely acquaintances, sad to say...

joe134cd

I had an interesting one the other day, with a FBook jw friend. Although I mentioned to him that I wasn't going to meetings, I sincerely wanted to know about the flags been flown out side the KH in Chile (he lives there). I then showed him the letter from the chilean branch. 24 hour later I was blocked. Although telling of jw friendship I can't say it's surprising.

How do you manage to keep JW friendships after you left the organization?

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