WERE YOU TREATED POORLY IN THE CONGREGATION?

by minimus 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mimilly
    Mimilly

    dantheman - I have been told by many people that I have a rare combination of intellect, common sense, humanity, affection, attractiveness and a youthful vunerability. So, if that is bewitching, fine. But it is no excuse to shun me without reproof, or error. And it is definitely no excuse to blame me for a man abusing me.

    My name is Salem and I bewitch men! LOL. It is kinda funny, although back then my name was not Salem.

    I understand what you are saying - I really do. It's just no excuse to abuse me, and I know you'd agree to that.

    Mim

  • minimus
    minimus

    ouch leelee, that hurt!

  • jwbot
    jwbot

    I still havn't made my introductiones yet...but this topic stuck out to me because I felt like I was abused.

    For one, I was actually verbally abused by my then-bet friends mother. She would call me names, ("whore", "manipulative", etc.) and yell at me and continue to yell as I was crying.

    I didn't have much friends, and eventually, my so-called best friend started to ignore me. A couple girls hung out with me out of pity I think, because I was depressed and my parents were worried so made sure people would hang around me. They were as transparent as windows. I wasn't part of the popular crowds or families either. Guys ignored me, etc. Oh did I mention I was an opinionated, open-minded, independant FEMALE, which you are all well-aware of, is not greatly looked on as being good.

  • RandomTask
    RandomTask

    When my mom first got in my dad wasn't a witness, well he was never a witness, but later my parents got divorced so I was in a single parent family. I never had any good friends at the hall, I used to stand in the back as a kid and no-one would talk to me before or after meeting, maybe just say hi and walk away. I used to get so depresses as a kid, thinking there was something wrong with me. I had a lot of friends at school though through the years and thankfully my mom was one of those who let me play with the neighbor kids, if not I would have probably killed myself or something.

    Not really, I never got that depressed, but it was hard.

  • Scully
    Scully

    For the most part, as long as I was a "good" little dub and put in my hours, I was not treated poorly at all. Occasionally, when an elder or MS asked my husband for his "honest opinion" on a matter and ended up hearing something they didnt really want to hear, we would get the cold shoulder temporarily.

    There were times when we were going through some difficulties, and I would really make an extra effort to put in a few extra hours of service. On three occasions, in two different congregations, I showed up for mid-week field service with my young son in tow. Id gone to the effort of getting up extra early, getting both him and myself ready, had my service bag all prepared, and a vehicle. Nobody wanted to go with us. Nobody even wanted to give us Not Homes to do by ourselves. So we went home. One instance occurred when the CO was visiting, and he didnt even try to rearrange the group so that we could have someone to work with. Each time, I left the group in tears, feeling rejected, despondent, and "not good enough".

    In another congregation, a sister once called to invite me to go in service with her. I agreed and was excited that she asked me because she was a pioneer. When I asked her who would be coming by to pick me up (with my son), she said: "Oh, I thought you had a car we could use. Well forget it then," and hung up in my ear.

    It seemed like whenever life dealt us a sh!tty hand and we were struggling, we had more problems with the JWs than when things were going well and we had no trouble with meeting attendance or service. It was that kind of hypocrisy that got us finally opening our eyes.

    We finally realized that the good treatment we received was directly proportional to the amount of @$$-kissing we did.

    Love, Scully

  • In_between_days
    In_between_days

    It makes me feel sick to hear such dis respect for Jehovah.

    I dont believe that we were talking about Jehovah were we? Is'nt this thread about congregations? Did I miss something?

    All I can say is that you should all go and live it up now because your happiness is not going to last for long.

    My, what a loving christian attitude. It makes you almost want to go back, doesn't it?

    but i know i wont be coming back!

    How disheartening! Thats a real shame, leelee.

    At least you did alot of good though, in your debut one and only post. No doubt, you've made a real impact on the demonized minds of everyone here. - Thanks, dahllin'!!

    Anyway, was I treated badly in the congregation? YES! On several occasions. I will not say all Jw's treated me badly, there were some really lovely people I knew in the org, but there was some bad experiences. I had about 3 congregations spreading rumours about me when I was 16 - I dyed my hair black, I was labelled a witch and a satanist, not just by gossipy youths, but mothers and a few elders too. That was some really upbuilding encouragement for that hard time in my life, I was trying to get over a personal truama (inflicted by a fellow JW which I choose not to discuss just yet) and it was just the support I needed from this "loving" congregation.

    I was also deemed a "Bad Associate" by alot of people because I had not yet been baptised - I was never ready, and did'nt feel that I should be pressured into doing it, just because all my friends were. So mothers started warning all their teenagers about me, the mother of my best friend even said to her: "If IBD isnt baptised by the end of this year, I forbid you to associate with her anymore". That was a real help in the motivation of devoting my life to this organisation.

    Another friends father(elder) told her that I was a"Bad Association" because I dont look up enough scriptures during the meetings, and dont close my eyes during the prayer - how the hell would he know that, I wonder - What an idiot.

    These are probably really petty compared to some truamas others have been through, but hey, every little bit helps.

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    My friends and family kept telling me that I wasn't good enough to be one of Jehovah's Witnesses. Finally, one day, I agreed with them.

    To Leelee:

    Before you go:

    Don't let the door hit ya where the Good Lord split ya!!!

  • Wolfgirl
    Wolfgirl

    I was never accepted by anyone, and had rumours spread about me all over the place. I never understood what I had done to deserve it. I was baptised at 13, my father was an elder, I auxillary pioneered in the summer when I wasn't in school....

    I finally realised it was because I was ugly as a child because I was too skinny, and I didn't have the right clothes because we were poor.

    Ah, that warm Christian love.

  • funkyderek
    funkyderek
    I dont know how i stumbled over this site

    I do. You ignored the advice given by the Watchtower Society and performed a search for sites relating to Jehovah's Witnesses. You then came across this site and either missed or ignored the tagline that says "The place to discuss anything relating to Jehovahs Witnesses and the WatchTower Society". Such freedom of speech should have warned you that it was not a Watchtower-approved site. Then you spent time registering a username and posting an arrogant content-free message. Oops! Stumbled indeed.

  • rosalyn
    rosalyn

    Was treated well in the congregation that I grew up in. But then again I had a mother that everyone adored and a father, who, though a stern elder was very helpful when different ones needed a hand.

    Mimilly there were certain women that were "bewitching" yes in the organization and the married ones were so worried that they were going to lose their husbands to them.....well that's the way I looked at it. But there was probably already a problem in the marriage anyways.

    I haven't taken the time to read all the posts because I want to send an email to leelee. I will be very kind......I promise.

    rosalyn

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit