When did you realised that everything had changed?

by In_between_days 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • In_between_days
    In_between_days

    In life, there are certain pivotal moments when you realise that every thing has changed dramatically. It's a breathtaking and overwhleming feeling. You may think back to who you were on this day a year ago, compared to who you are now - the contrast is incredible.

    I find change in viewpoints and thinking evolves slowly, over a long period of time, you dont know the change is taking place until one day, you realise for one stunning minute that you are everything that you never were. Your life has changed completely.

    What could be a better example of this than the metamorphis from JW to ExJW? When did you realise? When was the one moment that turned your mind inside out - you are free completely of the WT and all of it's indocrination - you are a new person.

    So when did this hit you? And what made it do so?

  • In_between_days
    In_between_days

    I would also like to take this opportunity to apologise to the readers for my consistant keystroke errors and spelling mistakes. I am a very quick and innacurate typist, and never have the time to proof read my work - sorry, you'll get used to it. Whenever I read through what i've typed i'm always going: "Oh gawwwd...."

  • Wolfgirl
    Wolfgirl

    It was a gradual thing. I think the kicker was when 1. no one in my family (active JWs) thought it was important to tell me that my grandma (not a JW) had a second stroke and 2. my aunt (also df'd) told me the whole UN thing.

  • CFree
    CFree

    I would say that probably up until about a year after I was d'fd I still had the gut feeling that they were right and I had just chosen to leave the religion and my family had a right to ignore me etc. It wasn't until I went onto the internet one day and did a search for Jehovah's Witness and found so many more sites against them than for them that I begun to realise. Reading all those accounts about other people like me and people reasoning on whether their beliefs are right etc. Maybe I wasn't so bad after all!!

    It was quite a shock, like everything I had been taught my whole life was not necessarily right. A weird realization. Anger kicked in and I felt very bitter against my parents for bringing me up like it. I still feel angry but try to get on with life. It is so much better not being a JW.

  • Larry
    Larry

    When I got on the internet. After that, if can remember correctly, I think it was when I read a chapter on-line of Franz book explaining the blood issue - That was a real eye opener. That started the process, the rest is history.

    Peace and Security - LL

  • DJ
    DJ

    It was a gradual thing for me as well. Like, years! I guess it started with wondering why they never really spoke of Jesus. Then , although I was aware of some of the false prophecies, I never really knew that they claimed to be prophets! I always believed them when they said, "Oh we made some mistakes...so did the apostles." When I researched and found out all of the claims to inspiration that they made...I felt something in my head click. Unfortunately, it was only the beginning of my exit. It took me years to get 'deprogrammed'

    love, dj

  • In_between_days
    In_between_days
    That started the process, the rest is history

    ok, I dont think I put the question as I intended. I did not mean "When did you realise that you didnt want to be a JW anymore" I mean "When did you realise that you were definately, completely no longer a JW, and you did'nt care"? When did you realise YOU were one of the worldly ones? YOU had evolved into a full fledged, hardcore EXDUB (or apostate)

    Sorry about that guys, I can be a bit cryptic sometimes, I know. Thank you for your contributions though.

    let me give you an example of what I mean:

    It hit me how much I had changed when I realised that I now view the weekend as just that "The Weekend" I work all week, and I get the weekend off. I dont even think of sunday as being a crap day anymore - it's a good day, a lazy day. It used to be my most dreaded day of the week (meeting, witnessing) but now, without realising it, my most hated day had gradually changed into my most loved day - and I had'nt even noticed. I had changed.

    Another good example is a lady who related her thread not long ago on "What have you done with your meeting clothes" or something like that. She related that a JW had given her some meeting clothes of her sons that she had left at the JW's house months ago - she had'nt even realised that they were missing. It hit her - metamorphis - JW to EJW - see what I mean?

    Apologies again.

  • In_between_days
    In_between_days
    . It took me years to get 'deprogrammed'

    So what how did you feel after you were finally "deprogrammed"?

  • FreeFallin
    FreeFallin

    After being inactive for 6 years and feeling guilty as hell, I read about the UN scandal. I was positively devasted, infact almost turning into an oncoming car during the week that I obsessed about what I had learned. I just couldn't get it out of my mind. I finally realized that I was killing myself with guilt for an org. that was a lying, unfaithful whore. Once that was firmly in my mind I turned my back and haven't looked back since.

    FreeFallin

  • JosephMalik
    JosephMalik

    I would also like to take this opportunity to apologise to the readers for my consistant keystroke errors and spelling mistakes. I am a very quick and innacurate typist, and never have the time to proof read my work - sorry, you'll get used to it. Whenever I read through what i've typed i'm always going: "Oh gawwwd...."

    In_between_days,

    Say, I do this all the time. It is almost a trademark. I have just been kicking the posts out the door and let the reader sort is all out, but lately I have been trying harder.

    One thing though, In some of the discussions on the board I found an error in my work that I was able to corrrect without anyone noticing. Its been there for years. Yet I would have taken my lumps and thanked anyone bringing it to my attention.

    Joseph

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