Ever Shun a JW? (page 3)

Nanoprobe

Our family shunned the resident sex offender and his parents at our last kingdom hall. This family thought it would be fun to come to the same hall as the victim (a four year old) They complained to the elders that we refused to respond to even a Hello from them. It was fun looking at them as if we couldn't see them

Elsewhere

Nanoprobe,

I'm surprised the elders didn't DF you for lack of forgiveness.

They have a tendency to do stupid things like that.

Edited by - Elsewhere on 28 August 2002 12:59:34

FiveShadows

shunning is shunning.....if you shun like the jws...you are like the jws. if two women are pregnant...they're PREGNANT...regardless that they're both having DIFFERENT babies (issue's for shunning) ....they're still pregnant (Shunning). ~FS

Nanoprobe

Well, Elsewhere
Not Df'd but called the backroom and slapped a little. So we moved. However, family members that stayed in the hall a little longer were "marked". Once those elders start on your case they are pretty relentless aren't they?

FiveShadows:

If you think you would be comfortable visiting with and encouraging a Pedophile who's sole purpose in returning to the victim's hall seems to be to intimidate the child, then please go right ahead. Actually there were a few of those in our hall.....people who knew the truth about the rape and didn't care, so do I know you?

Big Tex

Nanoprobe:

I am so angry for what you guys had to go through. My Bible says not even GOD offers forgiveness unless it's asked for, sincerely and with a broken heart. Where the hell do those pompous self-righteous hypocrites get off calling you in the back for anything? If this religon were really The Truth, those same "men" would have pulled that oily little pervert and his mommy and daddy into that same room and ordered them to kiss the ground you walk on as they move out to another congregation! Have these people no sense of common human decency? Stupid question, of course they don't.

I wish I'd gotten to know you guys a little better. But then I wasn't at meetings too much myself. I'd been through something similar years before. You're good people. And that's hard to find these days. I hope I'm not intruding too much, and please forgive me if I am, but from my own experience recovering from sexual abuse, I can tell you what means the most (more than anything in this world) is holding them and telling them you love them and what happened wasn't their fault. Over and over again.

Nanoprobe

Thanks, Tex, you're not intruding. Now as we look back on the whole incident it seems pretty hilarious. When they called us into the back room the elders explained: The pedophile & his family were telling everyone he was innocent and we were telling everyone that he was a convicted rapist. They said we were causing divisions even inside families as one member would believe us and another would believe them. They said this very sincerely as if it was a logical statement. I can't think back on that today without laughing.

In the back room ****** had an all out fit and called the former PO a bald faced liar, and what was so funny was the elders didn't even attempt to deny it. The PO had just packed up and left (his exhaust fumes were still fresh in the parking lot)(and I know why, too) But the elders just sit there and didn't defend him at all. I laugh so hard to recall that incident, it was like they said, "yeah, we know."

One elder explained, " I am talking to you today because I"M A COMPANY MAN" And then gave us his little spiel, today I I condense that speech to: WE DON"T BELIEVE IN GOD, if we believed in God we won't have the nerve to do this, so are you stupid enough to continue to believe in GOD? It was a quick re-programing course so see how much we saved on therapy? And that's pretty funny too.

We (mostly my truly fearless husband) gave them an all out battle for months on end, but it did no good. Except it let the victim know that we did not condone this activity and it let those elders know that their little game would not be hidden. The CO and the service dept got plenty of words too.

The terrible truth is that very few witnesses will stand up for righteousness and that has made me decide that going to meetings is a waste of time. They would have gained more by watching Schindler's List, or reading the Scarlet Letter, or other activities.

Edited by - nanoprobe on 29 August 2002 15:24:41

SixofNine

Rex?

Nanoprobe

sixofnine, email me

Sentinel

Awww, Benext, ((((HUGS))))

That is so sad that your mom would behave that way. But, you aren't alone. My mom was doing that a lot, until I really put my foot down recently. It was bad enough that she totally disowned me for twelve years! I think my recent statements shocked her. I mean, I try to respect her, and expect the same in return. She is 78 and a very faithful JDub since 1959. A very sweet lady and I don't want to hurt her. But, if she really loves me, then she wouldn't want to hurt me either. So, we agree to disagree and so far it has worked since she reestablished a relationship with me in 1992. (I suppose there was some new light or whatever.)

I don't like confrontations, so I normally try to just avoided coming in contact with ones that were DF'd when I was younger. I thought it was terrible when they came to the KH, sat in the back, and were treated as if they weren't even there. When it hit home, within my very own family, I would sneak around to visit my two sister's who were DF'd. I don't believe my mom ever found out. I thought the shunning and rejection was so cold and unloving and I just had a difficult time, trying to show them love, but being a good little JDub.

When I was DF'd, they did the same with me. It was a shame we had to meet in secret. My childhood relationships with sibblings was "in", "out", "in", "out", with this one or that one, myself included. That made for a very dysfunctional family to say the least.

We're out and free and happy to be very close to each other these days!

Love and Light,

Sentinel/Karen

Double Edge

LARRY....

That was on OUTSTANDING letter. Kudos to you!! Well Said!

Ever Shun a JW?

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