Big Boys Don't Cry........ (page 2)

Focus

LDH opined:

Esther 8:9 is the longest verse !

In what language and what version, my dear?

Using the KJV (English) Bible, here are the 11 shortest verses by character count (shortest first)
John 11:35
1 Chronicles 1:25
1 Thessalonians 5:16
1 Chronicles 1:1
Exodus 20:13
Deuteronomy 5:17
1 Chronicles 1:26
Nehemiah 10:15
Luke 17:32
Exodus 20:15
1 Thessalonians 5:17

And the 11 longest (longest first):
Esther 8:9
2 Kings 16:15
Jeremiah 21:7
Ezekiel 48:21
Esther 3:12
Joshua 8:33
Daniel 5:23
Ezra 3:8
Jeremiah 44:12
2 Chronicles 31:1
Ezekiel 43:11

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Focus
(Face The Facts! Class)

freddi

It is ashame when a man cannot cry and brainwashes his male children that it is wrong and downright un-manly to show such emotion then we have a problem.

Hi All!!!
I am an inactive JW. The last time that I have been to a Kingdom Hall is about 11 yrs ago but I still try to keep up with what is going on with the society. I am happy to have found this site. Once again, "Hello to all."

CoolBreeze

When circumstances change so do behaiviors. I used to be a very emotionaly reserved person. I was raised to be very non-demostrative, no hugs, no kisses, especialy in public. I'm still not very confertable with public displays of affection, but I do lavish hugs and kisses on my kids because with them it just feels right. Maybe it's because other than them I've never realy loved anyone before.

When I seperated from my ex-wife, the thought of being a weekend dad, or even worse an uncle dad as so many of my contemporaries were, drove be to the brink of a nervous breakdown. The floodgates of a lifetime of emotional repression came crashing down. I literaly cried for about 36 hours. It was like I felt every sadness and letdown I had repressed for 34 years of my life. Those flodgates are gone forever now.

Now when I experience sadness, and even happyness sometimes the tears come freely. Not in public so much, but when I'm in the company of those whom I'm comfertable with.

Crying is not an ability, but a natural reaction. Supression of this reaction is an ability, one that for better or worse I seem to have lost. Just my two kiams worth.

Ciao,
CoolBreeze

Edited by - CoolBreeze on 24 March 2001 13:58:9

Englishman

ISP,

I will snivel at anything! I watched a bit of "Now Voyager" this week, whether it was lusting afer a young Betty Davies or Tchaikovsky`s "Pathetique" score that made me go all dewy I just don`t know.

Same everytime I watch the "Railway Children" and see Jenny Agutter yelling "My daddy, my daddy" as Pop steps out of the locomotives steam ( Fancy using a Black Five in that shot, way too modern).

Almost happened this pm when England went 1 - 0 down to Finland, but the eventual 2 - 1 victory dried me mince pies.

Englishman.

AhHah

I was surprised when I found this topic and I was surprised to read the account of General "Stormin'" Norman. Most men don't seem willing to talk about it. I enjoyed reading the different impressions about it.

Apparently, men can be very different in their emotional make-up and their need or inclination to cry. I have always been under the impression that I am given to tears more than the average man. Of course, I really can't be sure since men don't usually talk about it (a cultural stigma I guess.) I consciously try not to cry in public or around people that I don't know well, but sometimes I do anyway if I just can't hold the tears back. I know that I allow myself to feel things very deeply. I am often moved by the experiences of others, whether it be happy or sad, and I may cry or get teary in response to either. Movies often move me.

I get the feeling that many men learn to suppress their feelings or emotional responses, so as not to be ridiculed or considered weak. I do not consider myself weak in any sense, even though I am given to tears. I have never lacked courage or conviction and I have never been afraid to stand up for myself or my loved ones, physically if necessary. I am average in height but I have always been very physically strong and muscular and very athletic. I do not get intimidated by other men and I will stand my ground wherever necessary. My emotions don't interfere with my ability to take appropriate action where necessary or cause me to act inappropriately. So, in short, I don't give any credence to the stereotype that men who cry are weak. Of course, we all have moments of comparative weakness or strength, male or female, that is unrelated to crying or not.

I haven't posted here for several months until responding to Seven yesterday. I spent some time last night reading many of the current posts. This is "large room" now, but a very interesting one! I was surprised to read so many posts about so many topics that reminded me very much of my own posts. There was much validation here for me.

AhHah

Edited by - AhHah on 24 March 2001 17:46:58

ISP

Expatbrit said

Men should not all have to conform to a current politically correct idea about weeping.

We all seem to be influenced by what is expected of us. It reminds me about that time Clinton, then president, was attending a funeral and the camera caught him laughing with a friend, as if the 2 of them had shared a joke or something. The President realised he was in camera and quickly changed his demeanour, suddenly becoming 'upset' and making as if to wipe away a tear. He was criticized by the press and the public for his insincerity.

Sometimes it is a matter of embarrassment. We feel the emotion of embarrassment when we realise we have been exposed to greater social attention because we have done something wrong or inappropriate. Most of us, men that is, are none to sure about the subject of crying and the how it will be taken by those around us.

Lisa said,

Curious, isn't it ISP, that women 'say' they want a man to cry and then God forbid if he does.

That's probably true!

CoolBreeze said

Now when I experience sadness, and even happyness sometimes the tears come freely. Not in public so much, but when I'm in the company of those whom I'm comfertable with.

Thanks for relating your account. I would say that's how I am CoolBreeze.

Englishman…….some of those old classics are great! Do you remember 'Goodnight Mr. Chips'? I seem to recall that had me gulping uncomfortably!

ISP

somebody

Thanks for posting this subject , ISP. It was interesting to read all the replies.

My husband never used to cry at all. I had only seen him cry once in 15 years. what I can't figure out about him is that he cried when he got fired from his job, but never cried when his dad passed away. Anyway, that changed. He got depressed when he started nearing the age of 50 and he cries regularly since then. Maybe it's an age thing. I don't know. ( if there are any men who went through this when nearing 50, can you explain it? )I get very uncomfortable when he cries only because I don't know what to say to him. So, I leave the house or go in a different room when he does. that's probably the wrong thing to do, but that's what I do.

Thanks again for the topic, ISP.

peace,
somebody

larc

Some thoughts Somebody,

Some of your husband's sadness may be due to other things in life that coincide with turning 50. Some of it might be due to him thinking about the "what ifs" in life. That can make one depressed. Do you think, maybe, he should talk to a counselor? Would he post here and share his worries with us? Just some thoughts.

In my case, turning 40 was my toughest year. That year my father died, and a month later my mother found out she had cancer. Then, I found out that I had a medical problem to deal with. As I said, it was the worse year of my life. Turning 50 for me was uneventful. Last October, I turned 60, and I am just happy to be alive. So, I guess stuff hits us at different times for different reasons.

Back to the "what if" theme. I think we can play a dangerous game in our heads, by thinking "what if" this had been different in the past, and "if only" I hadn't made this bad mistake or poor choice? This is a line of thinking that is garanteed to make us miserable. I have done it myself, and try to dispute these thoughts as useless as soon as they set in. My heart goes out to you somebody. If is very difficult when a loved one is depressed and we feel powerless to do anything that will make a difference.

Englishman

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Big Boys Don't Cry........

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