Jeramy,
No apology needed. I was a JW apologist for quite a while online. WAY more than most. I had many an arguement, and even though mostly kind, I now with the benefit of hindsight see some of my arrogance and lack of compassion or empathy.
My humble suggestion is to sit a while with your decision to DA. Your new mind set is barely evolving. I am not an advocate of it to begin with, but your disappointment is fresh. I really feel for your buddy here too. Disfellowshipping is a mess. The random time periods, the broad stroke of what makes someone qualify for it under the terms "wicked" or "evildoer". Its waking up a lot of people. You can't preach forgiveness, and kindness, and outreach, and ten tell the repentant guy he needs to sit his ass down for a few more months so you can see what you feel you need to see.
Feel free to PM me. Our journeys sound similar, and my wife recently left due to matters of conscience related to the unjust treatment of the disfellowshipped.