Do bad things happen because you leave the JW's

by mamashel 25 Replies latest jw friends

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  roybatty

  Its my opinion that when one leaves the JWs they do go through a period of turmoil, especially if they were raised a witness. I know I did. Learning that youve been basically lied to and have also devoted so much time to an institution whos main concern is to control as many people as possible is overwhelming. Thats why it is critical to get involved with other pursuits. First, it will keep one from spiraling down a pit of self-pity. Two, it will help reinforce the fact that the WatchTower Society (along with all its cronies) are not Gods representatives but rather just businessmen who are peddling their publications.

  Personally, I got involved with volunteering at the local YMCA, coaching my sons football team and started attending a local church with my children (after a long searchfor a new church not new kids,,lol). Anyway, just becoming friends with good, honest people who are not JWs goes such a long way is leaving the WatchTower mindset behind. Im lucky to have met people like that here at work and in my neighborhood.

  I have to chuckle because as Im typing this I honestly cant remember if it was two or three years ago that I was DAd. Its just not important anymore. I guess thats what you and your family will need to decide, whats important to all of you. And one final thing. No matter what others say, boards likes this one are a good thing. Youll come across so many ex-JWs who are going through similar trials and experiences that youll be amazed how much company and support you have.
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  gumby

  Very bad things happen when you are an active witness too.

  Girls get pregnant, marry ' worldly boys' take drugs, smoke...you name it.

  I served as an elder many years and believe me....I was in the library dealing with problems week after week. Witnesses are not immune to problems. If a witness follows bible principals....certain problems won't exist.....this goes for anyone who follows bible principals.
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  jimbob

  I'd like to give my two cents to this thread. Everbody has bad things happen to them. It doesn't matter who you are in this world. But the difference with the witnesses is this.......while you're serving as a faithful witness and have bad things happen to you, they tell you it's because you're so faithful and Satan is trying to attack you. Now...if those EXACT same bad things happen to you after you've left the "truth", it's because you've left and bad things are supposed to happen to you when you leave Jehovah. It's like the witnesses can't figure out that bad things are gonna happen to everyone regardless of whether or not they're in the "truth". So don't ever feel like that's the reason something bad happens to you.
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  mamashel

  Thanks everyone. This is very helpful, Jimbob, that is so true, i had forgotten about that point. And just for the record, my daughter did get pregnant while attending the meetings so figure that one out! hehe And our biggest fear is taking the step into another type of faith, which is going to church. We were so happy years ago at a church we used to attend. I just dont want to upset my husband, even though he is inactive, he still doubts any other religion, and that makes it hard to take a step in another direction.

  thanks again

  mama
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  truthseeker1

  Bad things happen to everyone! Bad things happen to people who go to meetings, and those who don't. Bad stuff happens to the good, the bad and the ugly. Good things happen to everyone too. It all depends on how you look at it. You can blame the bad things on whatever you want, like not going to the meetings, karma, luck, whatever...

  She is just feeling guilty and looking for an excuse or a reason for the bad. I had some good stuff happen to me since I left, what does that mean?
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  The_Bad_Seed

  Nope, only good things, except realizing the fact that you have a handful of years left to make your life count.
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  BluesBrother

  Firstly , I am sorry to hear of your daughters plight. The poor girl seems to have had some hard knocks .

  Regarding the org, she is eventally gong to have to make up her own mind and you can only advise so much . I dont know if either one is baptised, have they been before a judiciall committee?

  This guy seems a hypocrite, he was still witnessing months after the affair ,now he will go back "In his own time ". I doubt it.

  But as the posters have said, he has the right. and a legal and moral responsibility for your daughter and the child

  Take care, warm greetings to you all. Let us know what happens
• 

  Double Edge

  And our biggest fear is taking the step into another type of faith, which is going to church. We were so happy years ago at a church we used to attend. I just dont want to upset my husband, even though he is inactive, he still doubts any other religion, and that makes it hard to take a step in another direction.

  So, make it a 'positive' experience ... search for a church group that's going to give you some spiritual reinforcement...go for the positive, feel-good experience. Take baby steps...just the fact that you're looking is going to create it's own momentum - Nothing of value is ever found without first searching. IMHO

  Edited by - Double Edge on 13 September 2002 16:32:32
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  Big Tex

  I can only speak for myself, but when I was in the organisation I became severely depressed and very nearly committed suicide. Meetings became so difficult that I would have to go to the bathroom to become sick. When I stopped going, I felt better. The depression gradually went away (seeing a psychologist helped). I no longer felt tremendous guilt or physically ill.

  I believe in God and I believe he created all things. I also believe he created the human body with a sense of what is good for it and what will harm it and I think we all know what harms us on some level. I say listen to your gut, that inner sense of right and wrong and it will never let you down. Letting others (ignorant elders and busybody blue-haired Witnesses) plot and plan your life will certainly lead to disaster and pain.

  Edited by - Big Tex on 13 September 2002 20:55:15
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  Dutchie

  Prisca said:

  Nothing happens because you stop going to the meetings - bad things happen when you make bad decisions.

  A wise statement.

  If bad things that happen to you it has nothing to do with your being one of Jehovah's Witnesses or not. Goof or bad things will happen in your life based sometimes on the decisions you make and sometimes just because that is how life is.