I'm Upset and Annoyed (page 2)

FreeFallin

((((Scully))))))

I agree with OFC and others. Go see your Gram and screw the parents.

Free

I truly understand how you are feeling. My mother was especially good at keeping things from me. She did it on purpose. I suppose it gave her a feeling of superiority. Even though these other people were close to me when I was growing up, and were never, ever involved with JW's, she would not update me on family stuff. Many beloved relatives died and were burried, and I never found out until "after the fact" by other family members. The worse incident was when my grandfather died (her father) He and I were close through mail. He lived in Florida and we corresponded. Also, I made a trip to Florida to visit him, so he could meet my little family at the time. (First husband and son)

I didn't even know he was taken to the hospital. I received this call from my aunt, who asked me if I was going to the funeral. I inquired "what funeral", and she told me that my grandfather had died three days prior. I was shocked and upset. She was shocked and upset for me. There was no way I could have made it to the funeral, but that was beside the point. Two days later, which made it five days after grandpa died, mom's letter arrived.

Of course, she was shunning me at the time, but I always thought that family affairs were still allowed to be discussed. I should have known. Since my mother and her sister are JW's, there was no one else who would have let me know. It would have been up to my mother. She should have called me. After I received the letter, I phoned her. Her answer as to why? She said "he was my father, not yours". Isn't that loving? I asked her if grandpa had been able to read my last letter sent to him, and she said no. I'm sure it came, and no one would read it to him. How very sad. How sick.

If your grandmother is still alive, there is time to reach out to her. Don't let anyone stop you.

Love,

Sentinel/Karen

Scully

Thanks so much to everyone for all your supportive replies. I buckled down and called my folks' home after trying to call my grandmother's house (no answer). My parents were both out shopping so I spoke to my sister for a few minutes and got some info from her.

This whole situation is complicated by the fact that Grandma lives about 2000 miles away. According to my uncle, when my mother was trying to call her last night, she would sit beside the telephone and refuse to answer it. (We're just the happiest little family, aren't we?? LOL)

Anyway, my grandmother was taken to hospital by ambulance this morning after she refused to get into my uncle's car to take her there. I'll try to find out more tomorrow. I've decided to take the high road and do what "normal" people are supposed to do when a loved one is ill. I can only hope that my parents will behave like the Christians they claim to be.

With Much Love and Gratitude, Scully

scumrat

I got a call last october from a hospital social worker stating that my uncle was in the ICU unconscious and that they needed me to sign documents for medical procedures. Well come to find out, my family knew that he was in there since september. They didn't tell me nothing. It wasn't until my family ( who are all jehovahs ) wouldn't sign the consent forms ( their conscience bothered them ) did i find out he was even sick. I know where your coming from on this.

It's a hard call. Do what your heart says.

scumrat

joannadandy

(((((Scully)))))

So sorry to hear this! But you really should just be there for your Grandma now. Deal with the dumb dubs later when the dust settles. No need during this pressure filled tense situation to make things worse. I think you can voice your displeasure with your parents, but don't let it blow into a knock down drag out battle. Just focous on Granny...

Again, sorry to hear this--

garybuss

My mother told me my cousin died 5 months after the funeral. She said, "We didn't think you'd care." Jerk!

gb

Bendrr

Agreed with all the above.

When my grandmother (step-dad's mom who I got close to, 'nother story) died, I found out on the day of the funeral. Two hours before the funeral to be precise. That in spite of the fact that my folks and I have always maintained somewhat regular contact by phone. I can garantee you that that was directed over their heads by the a**hole elder who gave the funeral talk. (btw, James Kelley: you and I WILL meet again someday)

Grandma comes first, shunning second. Go see your grandma NOW!

Col. Bendrr, [classified]

Swan

Scully,

I'm sorry about your granny's illness. You might want to try what I did recently. It seemed to work in that I was recently contacted to inform me of my niece's death and my mother's illness.

First, the background. They told me my grandfather died back in 1996, but no contact since. Then found out I had about 10 aunts and uncles that died that they never told me about. I was pissed! I found this out through the Internet doing a search on Social Security records.

Since they are so good at following JW rules, I thought I would use this to my advantage. I wrote the following in my letter to them.

At one time my mother left me a message when my grandfather died, but I have had no news since then. This past week I have learned about some things that I feel I should have been told of, but I was not. According to your latest rules in this regard (Kingdom Ministry insert, August 2002) family business is an appropriate circumstance for communication.

So I basically chastised them for not following all of the JW rules. They were picking and choosing which rules to follow, so I called them on it. It worked, apparently. We'll see if it continues.

You may want to try this, Scully. I present it to you for what it's worth.

Kind regards,

Tammy

Beck_Melbourne

(((((Scully)))))

I think you should shun your parents. You don't need them in your life if they are going to hurt you. You are not DEAD, you deserve to know family business. It just makes me sick!

Make contact with your grandmother and shun your folks, bugger them!

Beck

ozziepost

Our sympathies to you and with you, Scully.

I'm sure that Mrs Ozzie and I will be facing the same situation before too long. It's so hateful!

"Forgive them, Lord, for they know not what they do."

Cheers, Ozzie

I'm Upset and Annoyed

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