WT6-15-02 ?from readers-funerals for suicides

by LyinEyes 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • LyinEyes
    LyinEyes

    The question was this: "If someone committs suicide, would it be advisable for a Christain minister to give the funeral talk?" ((((((((((((me barfing already here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)))))))))))

    Here are some sick , literally made me feel my blood pressure about to explode , remarks:

    "How does Jehovah view suicide? Was the death really a self inflicted murder?" (What??)

    "Did a mental/emotional disorder trigger the suicide? " Again, what the hell ?????????)

    How is suicide viewed in the locality? ( Again, what the hell does that have to do with it??)

    Rather than to benefit the deceased , the main purpose of having a memorial service is to comfort the bereaved and to give a witness concerning the condition of the dead to those who attend.( I get from this.......... let's count some time witnesses, not honoring the life just snuff out )

    "According to some statistics, 90 percent of those who commit suicide have some kind of mental, emotional, or addictive problem? " ( Excuse me , but wouldnt you say that 100% of these poor souls are suffering from the above, what is the reason for the 10 percent that they say don't do it for the above reasons???? Bullcrap!!!)

    " How do people in the community view suicide and the death of the person? This is especially of concern for the ELDERS, who are interested in the REPUTATION of congreation of Jehovah'sWit".

    "Depending on the genereal attitude toward suicide in the locality, and particularly toward the case involved, the elders may prefer not to sponsor such a funeral publicaly or to have it in the Kingdom Hall".

    "If a Christain minister decides to do so, he be discreet in not making any firm statements about wheather a resurrection might be possible, any future prospect for the dead is in the hands of Jehovah, and noe one is in a postition to say wheather the deceased will be resurrected or not"

    My thoughts on this:

    Basically, they are saying don't do it. And by their lack of mention of the resurrection hope the WT is judging that they might not get resurrected. I believe the Bible says, when a person, dies, his/her sins are aquited for. Sins, mistakes, sorrow, grief, is all over for them, and I think they paid the price with their life. They didnt ask to be born imperfect. If you die, why would God hold just suicide against you ???? I am sorry but they are wrong on the statistics, all suicide victims or those who attempt it are in some way 100% mentally or emotionally ill.

    This makes me sick.

    When my mother committed suicide, no one gave her funeral talk. We had to pay a justice of the peace to say some words. No one came, no one sent cards or flowers. They were not there to support me and Denny , we were faithful active witnesses.

    I hate them to the bone for this.

    Excuse my venting today, but I just got a copy of that piece of crap Watchtower. When I read it I literally balled it up and threw it across the room.

  • LyinEyes
    LyinEyes

    I know I have already stated this many times in this forum , but I got so sick reading that magazine, I can't hardly think straight.

    One of the main points that makes me sick is the REPUTATION of the ELDERS. In essense they are saying they are too good to tarnish their holiness by doing a suicide funeral. Oh my what would others think??????? They are only concerned with the outward appreances of how they look. THey don't want to support or comfort the families of the deceased because , it is the same with the child molestation issues. They want to act like this doesnt happen in Jehovah's wonderful "spiritual paradise". So lets just act like it didnt happen and blame the dead person, they think. We are not at fault they say,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, they even disgrace them in death,,,,,,,,,,,,,, how sick they are.

  • Matty
    Matty

    (((LyinEyes)))

    Very appropriate for you to bring this up again today. The society's attitude toward this subject just astounds me.

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    Dede,

    Very well stated! And sorry to hear what happened to you and Wild Turkey in the aftermath of your mother's passing.

    Your post shows they're not REALLY in the business of comforting people. They're in the business of trying to gain and retain converts. The JW organization is like a machine that crushes any human feelings that gets in its way.

    Religion is bad enough. This kind of religion truly grieves the soul.

  • cruzanheart
    cruzanheart

    Amen to all you said, Lyin Eyes. I wish I could have been there for you when your mom died. I like the way a friend of mine at work put it yesterday: "What good is it to belong to a religion that doesn't give you spiritual comfort when you are in trouble?" That was in response to me telling her that we can't tell the elders about Dad's suicide attempt because they would cheerfully DF him in an instant.

    Love and hugs,

    Nina

  • orangefatcat
    orangefatcat

    I hear you Lyin Eyes, So sorry your dear mom committed suicide. It must break your heart. And yes I agree 100 percent with you, when a person commits suicide they are in a state of mental illness, and the Society is so full of you know what, how dare they act as judge and jury against these persons. What happened to Matthew 7:1. They haven't one once of commpassion for a family that has lost a family memeber do to suicide. They don't know what leads a person to this. Maybe they are responsible. The strain of being a JW is more then some people can handle, it makes some people neurotics. Literallly. Statistically doctors have proven that there is a high incidence of mental and emotional illness among Jehovah's Witnesses.

    Then there are those who have mental illness from tramas in live or schizophrenia, or manic depression, or bi-polar disorders all of which are not their fault, it is something that happens due to chemical imbalances in the human brain and receptors. How dare the WTS set themselves up as God to judge these dear people. Yes like you Lyin Eyes I am enraged . Will they ever wake up and smell the smoke.

    I doubt it very much.

    Love and hugs and kisses to you Lyin Eyes

    Orangefatcat

  • Amazing
    Amazing

    Hi LyinEyes: Excellent post, and I share your disgust for the Watchtower magazine. I am sure that the majority of JW Elders would give a funeral service for a victim of suicide were it not for the Watchtower religion's teachings and policies. Human nature tends to spontaneously do things that are caring, most of the time ... and only questions or holds back when some force like a religious or political authority makes trouble.

    I have lived with this suicide issue since the late 1980s when my wife became clinically depressed. She made a few attempts on her own life ... and with her I have a constant fear she will one day do it. When she became depressed, at least when we became aware it was a serious medical condition, it was a time when the JWs were more caring about it ... a time when the Watchtower Society was promoting concern, understanding, and non-judgmentalism ... so she received some good support from her JW friends.

    Then in the early 1990s, cold winds of change started blow toward the attitude of 'no more Mr. Nice guy' as one Circuit Overseer put it to me. Fortunately we were exiting from the religion ... and she was spared this kind of crap from the Watchtower Society ... I for one am glad that we got out when we did ... for it seems that the hard-line mentality of the current leadership is something more than I could have taken.

  • Fire Dragon
    Fire Dragon
    "If a Christain minister decides to do so, he be discreet in not making any firm statements about wheather a resurrection might be possible, any future prospect for the dead is in the hands of Jehovah, and noe one is in a postition to say wheather the deceased will be resurrected or not"

    WAIT A SECOND!! When a faithful witness dies don't they do just that at the funeral?! At my uncle's funeral they talked about everlasting life in paradise and commented that this is what my uncle looks forward to! What will these hypocrites say next?!

    (((((Dede)))))

    -Fire

  • DeProgram
    DeProgram

    I Know Ha !!! (true story) Before I DA'd myself and one of the many reasons Was a young married Woman in the Shadow Mountain Cong in Phoenix, Regular Pioneer, at every function was having some problems (dubbed mental problems by all the nosey ones in the cong) she was seen meeting with the Elders after several meetings (what a pain those poor busy brothers have to work all day than listen to complaints all night,was the little voices) anyway she was admonished for her problems to take in more personell study etc. For Gods sake she was practicly living at the KH as it was. Evidently,she was having some sort of mental breakdown, gossip was she was abused by her Elder father (blasfimy rang out in the ranks) well she did find relief from her mentall termoil that came in the form of tossing herself of the freeway overpass into oncoming traffic. Yes she was killed, what got me was the lack of compassion for this poor sister, (yes she really suffered da de da da da) I blame the Elders for her death because of the lack of these words. Maybe you should take a break and seek some proffesional help, I can recommend a few good ones. Murder I say, Her Husband took it remakably well, bought himself a Viper sports car, and a Norton Motorcycle with his earnings and moved into a nice new fancy house in another city, I understand he took it really hard...NP

  • DeProgram
    DeProgram

    Oh I almost forgot, I couldn't bring myself to go to her Funeral and listen to all that hope of the resurection crap, she should have been taken care of on this side of the res.

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