I would say that I get up each morning in a pretty good mood. I get ready for work, drive there and then go about my business. Apparently though, not all of my employees have the same morning. This afternoon one of my staff members walked into my office and was all upset, she started complaining about this and that and giving all the details as to why she was so upset. It seemed like it took forever for her to get all the details out, and at the end she comes to this question. "What do you think?" or "Do you agree with how I handled this?" When she did this, I got the oddest image. It was of her holding this "ball full of anger", and she wanted to hand it off to me and others. Ever feel this way at times? Like people are so unhappy with someone or something, that the only way they will feel comfortable enough with it is to give the ball of anger off to another person. What I have noticed in my office, is that I can tell who ever accepted it, from who did like me and ignored it and let her keep it. The ones that accepted it, seem to take on the traits of anger that the person who tossed it to them had. They then add to it, and pass it on to other people with even more anger and frustrations. I even see e-mails at times, where people have such a heavy ball that they write me long wordy letters telling me how bad something is or how angry they are at someone. They mention all the details of what they had happen, why they felt wronged and even mention what they would like to do to get the person or persons back. So when this happens, what do you do? Do you take the ball from them and accept it? or do you bounce it away and go on with your day, knowing that such a thing is not worth holding? I guess I ask this, as I kind of do the latter. I tend to just have a great day, and that is all I accept. When people come to me and tell me about all their anger and frustration. I do not respond or add on to it. In fact I will say, "Oh really, did you hear about what my wife is doing in the babies room" and go off on something positive. It is my way of reflecting it away and showing that my mind is not going to accept the negative thought they wanted to plant. In most cases, it just tends to quiet them down fast. Because people want to give you the anger to make them feel like others are having a bad day too, when you bounce it away. Well they get real annoyed. In my time on forums, I have noticed the affect of "balls of anger" running through threads. I have seen them tossed around and played with and made larger. I have even seen thoughts that were just a expression of hate, that people grab hold of and ran with the ball. In all, I think I always try to present my friends with a ball of love. I think I feel better passing happiness around and getting people to think about things that bring them happiness. Not saying that there is not moments when anger might come into play, but why accept the anger of others, when there is so many things we have to deal with on our own without adding theirs. Now I am not offering this as some odd council, but rather as a "long winded question." Do you ever notice how often people can turn a good mood into a bad mood, just by them passing a ball of anger to you, that you to easily accepted? If so, why do you accept these and have you ever realized it did that to you? Added later : I would like to add that I would never ignore a friend who needs to talk. Venting though to recruit others into your anger or side, is more what I am refering to here. Before I left for the weekend, I did not want my last post to make me sound like I was a person who did not care. Just wondering
Edited by - kenpodragon on 5 October 2002 3:33:17