Do we judge others? It seems to be we don't judge about things we don't care about. For example, if you think inter-racial marriages are OK, then you don't judge people in a an inter-racial marriage. If we think something is wrong, then we judge people who do it. For example, if we see an adult beating up a child we do judge that adult. Perhaps, I am stating the obvious here. It is just when I hear someone say that they don't judge others, I see as an attempt for that person to pat themselves on the back. The fact is that we judge people every day and we have to, in order to survive and to be able to get along with others. We all separate the sheep from the goats in our personal lives.
Judging Others
by larc 31 Replies latest jw friends
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Amazing
Well, Larc, good points ... I just hope I never get to be viewed as an old goat.
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larc
Hey Amazing, I am an old goat and proud of it. There are certain advantages on being an old goat. You can do things that people view as excentric. If you do these things when you are younger, people think you are a jerk. Same behaviour, different age. Also, I am at an age where I can comment on another woman's beauty to my wife, and it doesn't bother her. She knows I am not going anywhere. Every age does have its advantages.
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sister grace
you are so right. we all judge others Maybe that's good maybe not. i know i have been guilty of judging people before. the problem i see though is when people do the judging with meaness and hatefull intentions. when someone is doing things just as bad or worse and then turn around and look down on someone for the same thing that is very wrong. and if those people get away with it then they become "elders" and really hurt people
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larc
Sister Grace, you make good points. I think it is easier to define what is judgemental than it is to determine what is nonjudgemental. Since we all make judgements and have to, perhaps in it is a matter of degree. Maybe it has to do with making appropriate judgements. I don't quite have a handle on this. Another example: all parents have to make judgements about their children's behaviour. So, is the parent being overly judgemental, critical, and nit picky, or, are they making appropriate, balanced judgements?
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BeautifulGarbage
Oh, I suppose an old goat does have it's appeal .
Larc,
I have made comments along the same lines. Yes, I am judgmental. Most people should be. To use ones judgment with discernment is a good thing. I think the meaning now to be "judgmental" is to publicly criticize anything to which we do not agree, regardless of circumstances or information available. Though, some individuals use the judgmental label in an attempt to quiet people. "If you don't like with what I do, then you are just being judgmental" type thing. People, especially XJWs, don't like to be called "judgmental".
I think that when one is newly out of the borg that is one of the challenges of claiming ones life back. Witnesses are indoctrinated with what is good and what is bad. Using ones decision making abilities is a learned skill. In the WTS there is no allowance for personal "judgment" and choices are not an option for the most part. So, XJWs have to learn to forge their own path as to what is acceptable to them, and what isn't. There are many stubborn branches that resist to be cut off, but with repeated sharpening of brain cells the reward is a clear trail that leads to the satisfaction of ones own self determination.
Andee
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animal
I teach my kids that just one word can tip your hand... can show your prejudice or judgmentalism... to not do it. They hold up pretty good, but when I hear them slip up, I pursue it with them.
I work hard to not tip my hand, while trying to get others to tip thiers. Life is fun.
Animal
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larc
GB, you comments about the JW view of good and bad caught my attention. When I left, I was judgemental because of the programmed ideas of right and wrong. It took a number of years for me to understand the diversity of people, their differing values and learn to accept these differences. I still think that we do have to draw certain limits. I think that all here would condemn pedophiles. I don't think anyone would say, well the pedophile has the right to live by his impulses. We must accept him and celebrate his uniqueness.
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Jesus Christ
Dad damnit, haven't you all learned that the only ones who are really fit to judge anyone are dad and I? You just don't learn do you? All I can say is that I hope I don't have to come down there and die again for you people.
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WildHorses
I try to view people this way...........................Don't judge me unless you've walked a mile in my shoes.