Praise Jah - Designer of Killer Sperm

by PopeOfEruke 35 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  PopeOfEruke

  I was reading about a recent scientific discovery in a new book about human sexuality. It has long been in evidence that married women who are having an affair often fail to get pregnant. As soon as one of the sexual partners leaves the relationship pregnancy often occurs quickly thereafter.

  Scientists may have discovered a mechanism for this. Scientists had long known there are different kinds of sperm, ones with long straight tails which are the "egg-getters" and other ones with twisted curly tails which were once thought to be simply deformed. Now it seems these curly-tailers are in fact 'hunter-killer" sperm whose job it is to track down and destroy sperm from other males. Their job is to give their mans' "egg-getter" sperm the best chance of claiming the prize. So male HUMANS have built-in technology to counter the fact that human females WILL HAVE SEX with multiple partners.

  If this theory is proved, it sure opens a lot of question for Dubs. All things created are evidence of an intelligent designer, so they say. Jehovah. So Jehovah, the divine instigator of marriage, KNEW IN ADVANCE that women would "play up" and DESIGNED Killer-Sperm with that very knowledge in mind.

  And they say that Adam and Eve had free will!! What baloney! Either Jehovah is a pervert of the highest order, designing males and females with a predeliction to adultery, and then KILLING them when they do it, or else he prearranged the whole Garden of Eden scenario knowing FULL WELL that Adam and Eve would fail the test.

  What a charming God to serve, I can't understand why I stopped worshipping him.

  The Pope
• 

  nilfun

  
• 

  ballistic

  I was one of those killer sperm with the twisted tale but somehow found the egg.
• 

  PopeOfEruke

  Ballistic

  lol!!! I think Farkel falls into the same category maybe as well!

  I wonder if all the straight-tailed sperm join in a chorus at the other ones and chant "Twisty tails! Twisty-tails!!! Never find the egg!!!"

  Pope
• 

  Beck_Melbourne

  Pope

  Sorry to take so long to reply to your threads, I'm not usually this slack

  I marvel at your knowledge of the intricate details of sperm, do you have a diary of their journey?

  IMO I believe that Hovah would have allowed multiple partners for both sexes so long as they both made an effort to 'fill the earth and become many'. Rather then a perversion of the omnipotent one, it compliments his divine will for mankind. But of course, this is only my opinion, there is nothing to suggest that Adam and Eve's offspring didn't copulate with more than one partner...there's nothing to suggest that Adam and Eve didn't either....now that's just gross as it would have been with their own offspring, but who knows.

  There are other areas of perversion that disturb me, like allowing Lot to impregnate his daughter so that his seed would continue - WTF?? And then there's the Hebrews with all their wives and concubines - and don't forget King David (or was it Solomon) who had a sweet young thang in his bed chambers who was supposed to keep him warm at night. Pervert!! These were Hoovah's fine faithfuls...eeeekkkk!!

  ~Beck~

  ps...I shall do a search of your threads and make sure you have been getting plenty of LOL's
• 

  Satanus

  'Every sperm is sacred'. Farkel278:13.

  It looks like an automatic mechanism to allow the female to play the field without much chance of getting pregnant. Then, when she settles down, she automatically gets pregnant. Ain't the evolution god great?

  SS
• 

  czarofmischief

  Where is your reference for this material?

  Also, I will cut and paste this for my fiancee, so that she will be overawed by the evidence [and allow me to copulate extramaritally] of:

  FROM POONTANG LOST TO POONTANG REGAINED!!!

  CZAR
• 

  PopeOfEruke

  To the Czar from the Pope:

  I haven't got the book title with me, I can get it later. But try a GOOGLE search and enter KILLER SPERM, there is a host of references.

  dasvedanya!

  Pope

  More on killer sperm:

  A sperm is NOT a sperm is NOT a sperm, but THREE kinds of sperm. Numero uno sperm is what we used to think of as regular ole' sperm, the kind that swims upstream looking for an egg to fertilize. Now we know there is a sperm number two, who is the blocker' sperm. This sperm can't swim at all. So what is his job? He just wraps his tail around his head, and in the best tribute to Vince Lombardi, simply becomes a blocker, protecting the queens tomb (womb?) from other visitors. And now we also know about sperm #3, a very special if not somewhat nasty little evolutionary creature, that we have discovered to be killer' sperm. His job?, to search out and destroy other 'foreign' sperm in the neighborhood. And just what is 'foreign' sperm and where did it come from? Any of you girls out there know? Now we come to the heart of the matter.
  
  Sperm #2 and #3, Blocker' and 'Killer' sperm have one evolutionary job, which is to discourage the next guy. In other words, we guys in our infinite wisdom are biologically prepared for you gals to have a little trouble making up your minds (Yes, that trait goes way back). And, depending on the specific lady we are with, it has been found that we can sub-consciously control the amount of killer sperm we produce, depending on how faithful we think the lady is. So we not only try and impregnate you, we also leave little booby traps around for the next guy. That's how badly we want you to have our baby. So the evolutionary lesson in this:
  
  1) Women have been changing their minds about the men they want since the beginning of time.
  
  2) Men are not as dumb as we act or appear.
  
  3) Men are territorial in nature, and have killer sperm' to prove it.
• 

  ballistic

  Now if we had killer sperm which didn't attack other sperm but the actual insemination mechanism itself, that would be the subject of horror movies.
• 

  Parousia

  Pope

  This discovery is amazing. What is the name of the book or study you are referring to?

  It makes me wonder if the killer sperm were a part of the original creation or another one of the many results of the fall? As for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.... After sin and the resulting curse many things changed, labor pains for women, the toiling by the sweat of man's brow to grow food, the earth producing thorns and thistles, and death to name just a few.

  I personally wouldn't recommend jumping to conclusions judging God. I had the experience of being harshly misjudged based on misinterpreted evidence and an inclination to throw the baby out with the bath water. When all the facts were known, the accusers were humiliated. Now I try to remember that nothing is so flat that it doesn't have two sides. I know what it is like to be wrongly judged, and God is one Being I wouldn't want to make that mistake with.

  Parousia