Not all of us are bitter Lucy, just approx 99% here, don't let me detract from the majority, but I have many happy memories.
Cop Out!!
by LuckyLucy 25 Replies latest jw friends
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RunningMan
Yes, there are problems in all religions - some bigger and some smaller. But these are our problems, that's why we talk about them.
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jws
Yes, some people try to hang too many of their problems on having been a JW but then it's easy to minimise the dramatic effect that having been a JW can really have on your life and relationships. I guess none of us really know what we would have been without the JW 'experience' (sounds like a theme park ride!) so maybe we'll never know.
I agree with this. I see many people say things to the affect of "because they were JW". There's a post about Michael Jackson that says he's wierd because of being raised JW.
Granted, it had it's problems. Many of them. Let's see, disfunctional family life (son of an elder who was so involved we got pushed out of his time), peer problems (no birthdays, holidays, not allowed to date non-members, etc.). Doctrinally screwing up my views.
And while I can look at that, I can also look at the fact that my parents lived by a pretty high moral code. I don't remember either of them ever being stupid drunk (though sometimes tipsy). They never did drugs. Only rarely did they even swear. They didn't tell dirty jokes. They always let us know they loved and cared for us. They were supportive, even with things like going to college (mentally, not monetarily - couldn't afford to pay for us).
In many cases, disfunctional families and abusive people are going to be that way no matter what religion they are. Although JWs have some policies that aren't very loving, the strict rules, in my opinion, probably curbed a lot of bad behavior. Both on the part of kids and of parents. Some of my good behavior may have been out of fear of punishment and didn't teach me to choose out of habit. But in the end, I got through my teenage years pretty well intact.
I think good families and bad families are more a result of the people in them.
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willdabeerman
i dont blame ALL my problems on the jw's.however like someone else said before when you are born and raised a jw you are not allowed to do,or participate in things that are normal.now granted other religons dont allow alot of things but come on. birthdays,holidays,watching certain movies,listening to certain music?.....those are all bad things right?. well last i checked they were all normal things people do to enjoy life and in the Jw's its all bad and if you do it you are shunned,ignored,and mentally abused into thinking its all bad.im sure there are other religons that have similar rules etc. this isnt a pissing match,but when you are taught all your life its either jw's way or no way, when you finally wise up and start enjoying life it does add to other problems.buit they are a source of alot of ex-jw's problems.i dont hardly view it as a cop out.
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Adam
I am glad for my experience as a JW. It helped me take a serious look at the whole god question and helped me to formulate my answer. Now that I have that answer, I can move onto other things in life without looking back or wondering. Now I consider religion a cop out!
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4horsemen
Being a JW is like being one of Pavlov's dogs. Through repetition and association you become conditioned to certain stimuli. Here's a beauty: 1Cor 15:33.
What few people know is that Pavlov's dogs were actually broken from their conditioned response. All it took was his lab being flooded. It seemed that one psychological\physiological event could just a easily replace another.
That is what a majority of people who were JW's and visit this board have had happen. Cognitive dissonance. They had a figurative flood event(s) that made them question or outright break away. They're not using the JW experience as a cop out. They're pissed when they realize just how comprehensive and insidious the JW experiement has been. Then you can either move on or continue being upset.
Actually in a way the conditioning continues. A reverse herd mentality. The conditioning is so thorough that the individual is amazed when they come to a site like this and finds other people feeling and expressing sentiment that they thought was theirs alone.
That is how powerful the Jedi mind trick of the WTBS is. When you leave they get you to think there is something wrong with you. Not them. Never them!
Politicians, Wall St, and Madison Ave have nothing on the WTBS when it comes to manipulation.
If I could add an epilogue to any "holy" book written by men it would be simply:
"Everything in this book may be wrong"
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Swan
The medium itself may present a slanted view. Some friends of mine who are xJW have never had any issues. They have moved on. They don't come here. So maybe you are getting a higher percentage of people on this board with issues to resolve. Not everybody here, of course, but a higher percentage than normal probably because that is what this board is for, to help people resolve these issues.
And I don't blame them for all of my issues, but my therapist believes that much of my abuse stems from them as the environment I was raised in. So as far as the shoe fits, the JWs should wear it. I am interested in resolving the issues, no matter where they lead me. Right now they are leading me to the issues of being raised as a JW and then shunned. It's not a cop out. Therapy, and dealing with the issues, is very hard work!
Tammy
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troucul
I think Lucy is trying to be the 'most hated person' on this board...
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pettygrudger
Yeah - JJ's probably pissed that he didn't make this thread!
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Earnest
This may not be a pissin' contest but it's a bit too smug to say:
Sorry LL but since I am a NON exJW I have to disagree. I am perfectly happy with being Lutheran. We dont have people controlling us, covering up pedohiles, destroying our families, ruining scripture, etc...etc... so your Theory that NON JWs are worse is Bullshit.
How about http://www.reporter-news.com/1998/2002/texas/sue0320.html
Civil suit names former Lutheran pastor, church officials
MARSHALL, Texas (AP) - A civil lawsuit claims a former Lutheran minister molested eight boys over several years and that his actions should have been halted by church leaders.
The lawsuit, filed Feb. 12 in state district court, names former Evangelical Lutheran minister Gerald Patrick Thomas Jr., the Chicago-based Evangelical Lutheran Church in America and several other church-related organizations as defendants.
Thomas, who resigned from the denomination's clergy roster about a year ago, could not be reached for comment Tuesday. A spokesman for the ELCA said the church will present its case in court, not in the media.
"We believe that when the facts are heard in the court, we are confident the church will be exonerated of the allegations," said John R. Brooks.
Thomas pleaded guilty in February to federal child pornography charges. The former pastor of Good Shepherd Lutheran Church in Marshall admitted in federal court in Tyler that he allowed two teen-age boys to photograph themselves engaging in sex acts at his home.
He faces up to five years in prison in that case. He has not yet been sentenced.
Thomas, who is free on bond, also awaits trial on state child pornography and sexual assault charges.
From 1997 to 2001 and several earlier occasions, Thomas committed acts of molestation "under the auspices of church protection and authority on and in church property," according to the 57-page lawsuit filed in Marshall.
"Shockingly, defendant, Gerald Patrick Thomas Jr., was known to be a pedophile before he was ever ordained as a Lutheran minister," the suit said.
In April 1997, Thomas was banned from a Lutheran church in Minnesota because of inappropriate behavior with at least two small boys, according to the lawsuit.
The suit claims Trinity Lutheran Seminary of Columbus, Ohio, covered up the incidents by conducting no investigation. Thomas was allowed to become a Lutheran minister and later committed multiple acts of molestation in Wilson, where he served as interim student pastor at St. John's Lutheran Church, and in Marshall.
Thomas "was fully entrusted and placed in a fiduciary relationship of trust and dominance, cloaked with the authority of God, over young minor boys of tender age as the Lutheran Preacher ordained by the Trinity Lutheran Seminary and accepted by the ELCA and the entire Lutheran Church Hierarchy," the suit says.
Margaret Farnham, a spokeswoman for the seminary, said the school has no comment on the lawsuit.
"We are aware he was a student here, but we don't have any details of the case," she said.
Eight unidentified males, including one who is now an adult, are listed as plaintiffs in the suit. The youngest was first molested at the age of 7, the suit says.
Edited by - Earnest on 20 November 2002 3:40:27