How that relates to this discussion is that while any religious group can be found to have abuse of all sorts occurring within their ranks, there are more problems than just child abuse that can have a negative influence on an individual's ability to function in the real world. If a child is raised in an environment of social isolation and ends up disfellowshipped and alone in the world with no family support and lacking the social skills needed to function effectively in today's world, that individual may indeed find life very difficult. In this case, I have no problem seeing a link between the social isolation a JW child suffers as a direct result of JW dogma, and the problems that can result later in adulthood outside the closed environment of the "organization". You won't find that link in "mainstream" denominations.
I wonder about the fundamentalists who home school their children, cutting them off from a normal association with peers. At least in my case as a JW, I was never told not to become friends with the kids at school. A large percentage of home-schoolers say they do it for religious reasons. I don't remember the reasons given, but I can imagine that they see schools as either bad influences or don't want their kids learning evolution and sex-ed. That's not too different from the JW views, but probably has a more dramatic effect by isolating the child from peers. I knew of only one home-schooled JW and she was a lot stranger than all the other JWs I knew - and very shy - never really talked to other girls at the hall. I know home-schooled kids are often smarter, but based on my (and I admit limited) encounters with such kids, they tend to be very shy and reserved. Wonder what their adult lives turns out like?
I don't mind bitching about the JWs or how my life could have been different. Maybe I'm just not affected by some of the issues that others have experienced. I know things like child-abuse would screw up anybody. I don't deny that some people were legitimately affected by their JW experience and continue to be haunted by it.
But I also feel some people like to use scapegoats. Aside from JW issues, I could blame all my problems on the fact that my family didn't make much money because my father worked manual labor and my mom stayed home with us. I didn't have all the toys my friends had and my mom often made our clothes on her sewing machine (and even back then, we felt embarassed by some of those clothes). We also had to pay for our own college. How did that make me feel? Not having the neat bikes or toys? Not too good - out of the loop. Wearing mom's homemade clothes? Often embarassing and sometimes we'd get teased. Paying for my own college and living at home? I felt underprivileged, left out. While other kids stayed in dorms and had things paid for, I was out working and commuting. They could be in their dorm room studying in 5 minutes without a job to steal their time. It was a lot harder for me. So, boo-hoo for me! Maybe we should have more pity on the working-class poor kids and pay their way in college so they aren't so messed up.
I believe you accept the hand you're dealt in life and don't go bitching about this or that screwed you up. There are always going to be people out there with a better life than yours, richer, better-looking, healthier, more popular, more outgoing, you name it. If you get caught up in being a victim and that whole mentality, you can't enjoy the life you have now. Bury it in the past. Maybe the only thing you can do about it is to help others that are caught up in the same things that affected you. So help that JW escape his religion or contribute to a college fund.
I may not like some of the things I was brought up with, but I don't think being a JW was the one cause of all my problems. Or that others didn't have it worse than me. Some kids parents were stricter than mine and others got yelled at a lot more.
If I've had any long-term affects from being a JW (or rather leaving it), it's to not trust organizations, be they religious or otherwise. I'm more of a skeptic. But some of that can be considered a positive thing that I've learned from experience. I've learned that no matter how persuasive somebody is with their "evidence", they can be dead-wrong. I think that's a good thing.
