Welcome, Village (clearly not an) Idiot! Well done on extracting yourself at an early age. I was in much the same situation as you. In 1967 My dad accepted a bible study for our entire family when I was nine years old. They all discontinued, because my mom violently opposed. She said no one was going to come into her home and tell her what to do (smart woman, bat sh*t crazy, but smart). Anyway, I was the only one to continue on. I essentially raised myself in The Lie. I determined at age ten that I was going to be a JW and was baptized at age 16 when my father finally felt I was old enough to make that decision. I gave up a college scholarship to "pioneer where the need is great".
I have so many regrets. I married young as most good JWs who marry do. I married a former full-time pioneer, Bethelite and ministerial servant who faded when our daughter was two and a half years old. I raised my little girl and my son in The Lie. My daughter "respectfully declined" a shepherding call when she was 17 years old and went away to college. My son tried to commit suicide and was subsequently disfellowshipped. I didn't wake up until I was 52 years old! Starting over is hard, but it can be done. Please try to re-frame how you think about yourself. You are a survivor, not the "walking wounded".
Again, Welcome!
