The Atheist

by target 16 Replies latest social humour

  • target
    target

    One beautiful morning an atheist was walking through the forest, admiring natures surroundings...

    He looked up and saw the trees swaying in the wind high above him and smiled...

    He saw the river glisten in the sun twinkle like a new born star and it made him warm inside...

    He thought to himself that Mother Nature had made a true and wonderful world...

    The atheist had walked a little further down the track he had taken when suddenly a bear jumped out of the bushes only a few yards ahead of him and started growling, looking hungry and ran quickly towards him...

    Seeing the big bear bounding towards him he screamed in horror and started running as fast as he could away from the bear...

    Knowing that the bear would catch up to him and he had no chance, the atheist soon ran out of breath and in a few paces fell to the ground...

    As the bears shadow fell upon his face and his paws come down upon his chest, the atheist screamed
    "Oh help me God"

    Suddenly the trees that he so much admired stopped swaying...

    The river he loved suddenly stopped flowing..

    And the sky opened up and a voice begun to speak..

    "I am god, and even though you dont believe in me, I am here for every being on this earth"

    The atheist felt relieved a little bit and asked god...

    "Im sort of in this situation, Im only asking if you can help me get out of it"

    God thought for a moment and said...

    "I will give you one wish to help you and that is all, you may proceed with this wish"

    The atheist thought about this wish for a moment and then spoke to god..

    "Well, I dont really want to become a Christian, so I wish the bear to become a Christian"

    God spoke...

    "So be it done"

    Suddenly the sky closed up...

    The river turned back into its flowing glory...

    The trees began to sway again...

    And the bear clapped his paws together and said...

    "Thank you God for this meal Im about to receive"

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    Suddenly the trees that he so much admired stopped swaying...

    The river he loved suddenly stopped flowing..

    And the sky opened up and a voice begun to speak..

    As if that has ever happened.

    Why is it that believers can't accept that some of us don't believe what they believe? Why do they have to mock our non-believe with stories of things that have never happened as if it is making a point?

  • Yizuman
  • Solace
    Solace

    OMG Elsewhere,

    If that aint the pot callin the kettle black.

    Lookie whos mocking who with stories of things that never happend.

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.aspx?id=41460&site=3&page=1

    Puhleeeease....

  • rem
    rem
    The atheist thought about this wish for a moment and then spoke to god..

    "Well, I dont really want to become a Christian, so I wish the bear to become a Christian"

    I could never understand this part of the joke. That's about the dumbest wish I've ever heard of. Any self-respecting atheist would know that wishing the bear to turn into a Christian would be a guaranteed death wish.

    I guess it's funny to fundy Christians.

    rem

  • target
    target

    Elsewhere:

    Wait just a minute, don't go calling me a believer. I'm not. I just happen to have a sense of humor and I don't take offense at things that are just meant to be funny. Lighten up. I'm not mocking anyone.

    Even when I was a JW I could laugh at cartoons that made fun of JWs. Smile. Laugh a little.

    Millie

  • Solace
    Solace

    Yeah,

    Laugh a little Mr. "Pink Unicorn in the sky, sinners will spend eternity in a giant pot of glue."

    Correct me if Im wrong, but I believe you did say that.

    Hmmmm,,,, Sounds like mocking to me...

    Edited by - heaven on 21 December 2002 0:8:2

  • target
    target

    LOL at Heaven!

    You tell him, girl!

    Millie

  • Solace
    Solace

    Millie,

    The only thing is......

    If I know Elsewhere, I think he may actually be enjoying my sassyness.

    As a matter of fact, Im sure hes brewing something up for me as we speak.. Yikes..

  • Gizmo
    Gizmo

    One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books - the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species.

    Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?"

    "Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."

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