How are you getting along with your believing mate

Leander

So far for me this is really turning into an exercise of frustration. I feel like screaming

My mate is no longer a believer in the watchtower but she was for about a year after I stopped attending. Want to know what I did? I did nothing. I kept my mouth shut. Even when she came home complaining about how people were talking about me behind my back for not attending I just smiled but said nothing. Eventually she figured it out on her own.

Good luck.

Mum

Sorry, Leander, for what you're dealing with. But LB is right: no exercise, particularly of the oral mechanism, is probably best.

Skeptically Yours

Leander,

In my case I happen to have a true 'believing' mate, unlike me that I play quite a dangerous balancing/double life act.

What works for me is to strike his ego, and keep him happy in so many ways the WT can't.

Like me, he likes to travel and new adventures, so we spend much time doing just that. And... in bed........... oh boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm winning big time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Play it!!! Play it!!! Women like attention, romance, and men like sex, sex, sex!!!

Take care!

Jim_TX

Leander,

I am an ex-JW - my ex-wife is a JW.

I was married to her for over 20 years... and it got more and more difficult in the last years of the marriage.

Sometimes you gotta cut-and-run.

Of course, each case is different.

I wish you well in your situation.

Regards,

Jim TX

Leander

Thanks for the responses guys, I knew this would be difficult when I left the org but sometimes I feel like pulling my hair out. (which has started falling out since I left) I've been trying hard to make this marriage work, but lately I've been feeling like maybe I should start anew. I mean one of the main reasons I got married at 25 is partially due to the fact that I did'nt want to get disfellowshipped for having pre-marital sex. This is'nt to say that I don't love my wife but I honestly feel like I've traded my life away trying to be the perfect little witness. At age 30 I feel like a 75 year old man, I don't go out anymore on weekends because I no longer have friends to hang out with and I'm to paranoid to build new relationships with people outside of my family. **sigh** forgive me for whining I guess I'm just tired today

bikerchic

Leander sorry you are having troubles but try what Skeptically Yours says:

Like me, he likes to travel and new adventures, so we spend much time doing just that. And... in bed........... oh boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm winning big time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Play it!!! Play it!!! Women like attention, romance, and men like sex, sex, sex!!!

Hey it could be fun! No really forget all about the JW issues and get on with life. Do the things you both like to do or mainly things she likes to do and do them together. That is if you think she and your marriage are worth saving or is it something to toss out like yesterdays garbage? I think that is sad, and how would you feel if she told you that because you are no longer a dub she wants to divorce you?

Life is what you make of it, now go make it good!

Katie

DakotaRed

I *HAD* a believing mate, but the divorce was final this past November 12th. I still have to see her occassionally, like when she wants money or her car worked on, and I still get witnessed to. It isn't as often as before, maybe due to my "witnessing" against the witnesses to her.

Regardless, she has the Watchtower, and I have my freedom.

Lew W

LittleToe

Leander:
I bleed with you, bro.

After nearly a year out, I still can't see a light at the end of the tunnel, and it is soooooooooo frustrating.
The truth is that this place helps keep me sane, since noone else truly seems to understand.

I started making friends outside of the borg, before I left. It appears that even that has the ability to backfire, in this situation, since she is jealous of any time that I spend with them.
For goodness sake don't make the mistake I made, this year, at Valentines day. Buy her flowers any time but then!!!

I'm not yet quite ready to cut'n'run, but the situation is getting desperate. It sux, not being a quitter, huh?

I hope things pick up, for you.

MYOHNSEPH

My wife and I were both raised as JWs. I've not associated with the organization for over twenty years. My wife still regularly attends meetings and goes in field service. We will have our forty-first wedding anniversary in February, provided we're both still around. We have a great marriage and a great relationship and we are more truly in love today than ever before. We have great times together, dancing, motorcycling, traveling, or just going for walks. I think one of the keys is that we both have come to accept, love and respect each other for the individual we each are and neither of us are on any campaign to make the other into someone we're not. Another key is, my wife is a little unusual for a JW. She believes there is a lot more to each of us than being or not being a Witness. She believes the Witnesses have "the truth", in a general sense, but she also believes her relationship with Jehovah is personal. (You know, the kind the society has always preached but never really wanted anyone to actually have!) She allows her consceince to guide her in a number of issues "the society" would not really approve. As an example, we have four grown daughters who are all DF'd or DA'd, but she does not shun them. She recognizes all of them as good, decent people and treats them as such. And she treats them like her children. I respect her immensely for that.

One other thing: My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer two and a half years ago. She went through chemotherapy, had a double mastectomy, went through more chemo and radiation and now apprears to have it whipped. That ordeal gave our entire family a new perspective on life. It made us all realize how very much we all mean to each other and how priceless the love we share daily truly is.

How are you getting along with your believing mate

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