by Shytears 14 Replies latest watchtower medical
Oh,sorry if i confused anyone,but im not disfellowshipped just silent reproved,kinda on the down low,which is why i dont understand why they ignore me,not like it was public or anything,i think theres alot of rumors and stuff going around about me.,i think thats one reason,.and another is theres alot of jealously in the cong. sorry bout that_. laura
Edited by - Shytears on 12 January 2003 19:26:26
Hey Laura,
Sorry for the lack of love - even friendliness - you were shown by your "friends."
Some KH's are loaded with gossip - it's what makes the KH meetings interesting....sure ain't the talks! I also think it's more than that, though.
There's a meaness in some of the groups. From elders' wives, young married, teenagers. I know when my daughter was younger.....she & others could just be plain, downright, cruel - especially to ones who didn't "fit in" just right. God, thank goodness she left! Of course, then SHE was cruelly treated.
But she made new friends, happily married, and a new life. She's built it well.
Take care - and hold your head high. They're the losers.
waiting
There are several ways that information related to your actions or the private reproof might have been gotten out.
KH grapevine. I don't know of one that I ever attended where gossip was a way of life for some sisters (including elders wives) and sadly some brothers. odds better than 70%
Do some of the younger sisters and brothers go to the same school as you?
If so then the guy you had relations with might not have been mature enough to be a gentleman about what happened. Gossip at school often equates to gossip in the hall. odds better than 80%
Might one of the younger brothers or sisters if they attend the same school as yourself been at the game and one of them saw you getting in the car, getting out of the car or actually in the car with this guy. One witness is not enough to bring charges but enough to start gossip and mark you. odds about 40%
Being marked justly or unjustly is not fun and I feel sorry that anyone has to go through that kind of emotional blackmail. Another thing you might consider is that you are being overly sensitive to others actions while you are emotionally raw from recent events. (Preconditioned guilt that you have been taught is very hard to understand or even control)
The above is all just guessing; only you know for sure what you are experiencing.
Finally, just a friendly warning, leading a double life has a price to be paid in your trust of others, self-esteem, and the amount of guilt they will be able to trigger in you during interaction with witnesses.
Goshawk (been there done that class)
Edited by - goshawk on 13 January 2003 8:4:32
I am so sorry that you had such an unhappy experience. Perhaps you already knew in your heart how it would be, but you just thought "maybe".......and then, you were disappointed and hurt yet again.
Life is full of ups and downs, and the best thing we can do is not try to punnish ourselves needlessly. You need to make some new acquaintances and build some new relationships. It's difficult when you are feeling so down. Just remember: "this too, shall pass".
You have lots of folks on this forum, and elsewhere that do care about you. So, raise your head up high and take it one day at a time.
I am so sorry you were hurt. The rumor mill is very active, as you have experienced. It is a crime, that it happens, but I really think they rely on gossip to spread that kind of news.
Maybe it was a lesson learned for you.
