john your avatar is dexter?
Why Me?
by John Aquila 69 Replies latest jw experiences
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Driving Force
When I first became a witness I use to think, "Why do I have the privilege of knowing the truth", now I think, "Why do I have the privilege to know TTATT".
Oh shit, I went in a complete circle, and it took me nearly thirty years to do so.
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Ucantnome
i really enjoyed watching Dexter and Breaking Bad
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vinman
I haven't been on this forum for some months now. I thought I wouldn't come back. But I must say, you have kept me updated on the latest news. And many of your topics are very interesting, like this one. What I am seeing and reading in books like Diane Wilson's book, The Awakening of a Jehovah's Witness, actually is irritating to me. Why? If you read this book, you will see clearly that she remained in the organization for years. However, it is clear that her thinking processes were always in tact. She was never really asleep. Just complaining in her head why this and that were wrong. So what I see, is what many call an awakening, is really just the courage to leave. I on the other hand was in a real coma. When you love every aspect of the organization and in addition, love the Bible, like I did, it takes a miracle to wake up. So I guess I feel one needs to differentiate awakening and just leaving. That is important to me. Because the latter are of no help to me and I have seen on Facebook that they don't have the skills to awaken others. They turn JW'S off. I would of never listened to them. What I feel wakes up someone who is truly comatose, is seeing actual lies and cover ups in the literature itself. The reason is because I feel that all on this forum who were truly asleep (unconscious that anything was wrong in organization), woke up because they were a real truth seeker. Whether that was our perception of truth in Bible or we felt truth was in agnosticism or atheism. We just want the truth. We refuse to close our eyes regardless of consequences. -
Magnum
Driving Force: When I first became a witness I use to think, "Why do I have the privilege of knowing the truth", now I think, "Why do I have the privilege to know TTATT".Oh shit, I went in a complete circle, and it took me nearly thirty years to do so.
Hah!!! Exactly - exactly - the same with me! I've thought the exact same thing.
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Finkelstein
The WTS teachings and doctrines blind side individuals because its presented to them with love and concerning attention, like someone trying to save your life from imminent destruction.
Those smiles at the door go a long way into luring people into this relgoius organization.
Its long down the way during the indoctrination process that many start to realize and awaken to the fact that somethings not right.
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truthseeker100
I too have thought about (why me?) many times and I don't think it has anything to do with intelligence I think its as simple as being a follower. Many follow because it gives them a sense of comfort some follow out of fear some follow to achieve a sense of notoriety they wouldn't otherwise have. For me it was just a desire to know whats really going on in the world around us.
The objective of what really going on at least for me is its own reward, sort of like a Fermat's last theorem kind a thing. I'd like to elaborate more on this but I can't today because of the constraints of time and the words in this post just won't suffice lol .
It occurred to me the other day that even if I wanted to go back to "the truth" and get reinstated I'd have to sit down throw my hands up and learn what the witness teachings are today before I could agree or disagree with them as far as they are concerned. The overlapping generation thing would be the biggest change. For an organization and individual members that swallow this kind of new light all the time its clear to me that they are not averse to changing their minds about things as long as the GB says its ok to do so. They are followers and their peaceful existence is their reward.
My reward is just being able to figure something out and be content in doing so. It's doesn't sound like much but it's all just a matter of perspective. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" truer words have never been said.
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John Aquila
. What I am seeing and reading in books like Diane Wilson's book, The Awakening of a Jehovah's Witness, actually is irritating to me. Why? If you read this book, you will see clearly that she remained in the organization for years. However, it is clear that her thinking processes were always in tact. She was never really asleep. Just complaining in her head why this and that were wrong.
Holy cow! I never heard of that. To remain for years despite knowing. Another curve ball!
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John Aquila
john your avatar is Dexter?
Yea I liked Dexter. Serial killer BUT, only killed those who deserved it. True Justice. No beating around the bush. No judicial committees. No two witness rule. No waiting for Jehovah to take care of the matter. And he always got away with it. Like someone higher was watching over him so he could mete out justice.
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Alive!
I was always in the 'why me?' camp when I was a Witness.
Not born in.....the internal emotional turmoil was huge as I was 'studying'.
It took courage to 'join up' as I knew I'd be ridiculed by friends, family etc.
I believed that one day they'd see the truth too. I guess I should have listened to my inner concerns - the strange 'suit and tie' culture, no beards and how some of the witnesses had the most odd speech patterns and gestures ( I now recognise that as cult language)
I remember watching a husband and wife launch into an answer after I'd posed a question whilst studying - I retorted that they sounded like IBM salesmen.
A poster talked on this thread about the goodwill vibe, amateur people only desiring a wonderful new world - now we see a business corporation interested in stats and real estate.
Having seen the GB in the flesh via JW TV, my heart didn't lift up and I didn't feel compelled to say 'God is truly among you people'.
I actually felt sick. The slickness, false humility - if I can't trust my instincts, if I can't take note of the cold chill and hair raising on the back of my neck - what am I left with?
The killer for me is the boast 'we have the truth' - truth doesn't seek to deceive, deliberately misquote other humans, manipulate and coerce.