Whenever I run into JW that shun me

by Sadie5 14 Replies latest jw friends

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  Sadie5

  I haven't been DF or DA, just left. I run into JW's in restaurants, grocery stores and on the street and they act so stuck up, or give me a dirty look if I smile at them and say hello.

  I then think to myself, what reason do they have to act so arrogant toward me? They support a religion that promotes the secrecy of child molestation. Their punishment for child molesters is that microphone privileges are taken away(hard time). They allow child molesters to go door to door, putting children at risk.

  Their organization has stuck their nose in family affairs, the Lawrence Hughes case, comes to mind. Whatever happened to the father being the head of the household, or letting families work things out on their own.

  As an organization, they have misled many over the blood issue and caused the deaths of thousands. Young men went to prison, thinking they were doing God's will, but it was the decision of a few old men in Brooklyn who never had to go through anything like that. the organization encouraged the slaughter or thousands of innocent people in place like Malowi, for not obtaining a twenty five cent card. Yet, JWs in Mexico paid bribes to the goverment, and this was ok.

  Their literature and talks are always geared to do more, do more, do more. Yet their organization rarely reaches out to help the poor, the elderly, the hurting ones of the community. If a JW family is needing assistance, it comes from a few in the congregation that have good hearts and a few dollars to spare. It is not an organized effort. If they can put their efforts into building a Kingdom Hall together, imagine what they could do for someone who needs a home, or home repaired,groceries, clothing, heating, medicines or many other needs.

  They are so closed minded and prejudiced. They cannot imagine that a person could leave their organization because they see a lot of things that just aren't right. People that leave are branded as terrible, and bad mouthed.

  And so in closing, I want to say whenever they shun me, I feel a sense of pride. I saw what they truly were, and knew I wasn't like that. If they want to hate me for following my conscience, so be it. I can live with myself and my decision, I don't want to be a part of an organization that does such horrible things.

  They have nothing to be proud of.

  Sadie(getting off the soap box)
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  Big Tex

  I know how you feel. I was treated the same way after I stopped going. People I had known and were friends with for 10 or 15 years refused to have anything to do with me, even though I was not DF'd or DA'd and my wife still attended meetings. What people like that don't understand is that while they're looking down their noses at me, I don't consider them to be good association. I would never let me children attend any JW function. This is not bitter feelings, it's reality.

  Last year my wife changed congregations (thankfully she's since stopped going altogether). A few months later she found out that congregation had a convicted child molestor who had just returned from prison. No judicial action was ever taken against him (there weren't two witnesses so it "didn't count") but the victim's family was counseled to be more forgiving. After all pedophiles are people too and we can't hurt their feelings. Urgh. Anyway a few weeks later a children only skating party was held. My kids were there. So was the pedophile. Thank God nothing happened. But it could have.

  These people are so shut down emotionally and spiritually that they have become miserable human beings. They are taught by an organization that is cynical, pompous and self-righteous and so they mirror those traits. They live in an upside down world where right and wrong are fluid and dependent on what the latest magazine says. Absolute insanity.
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  Joyzabel

  ((Sadie))

  Very well put! I agree with everything you said. What pompous, arrogant people they come off as, but I'm sure they don't see themselves that way. (Did we when we were one of them?)

  I really liked this statement: "If a JW family is needing assistance, it comes from a few in the congregation that have good hearts and a few dollars to spare"

  That is so true. How many times was it a few strong families that cared for the weak.

  Pity them now, Sadie, because you can see that they are truly sheep without a Shepard.

  Hugs,

  j2bf

  Edited by - joy2bfree on 9 February 2003 11:53:58
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  Matty

  They are so closed minded and prejudiced. They cannot imagine that a person could leave their organization because they see a lot of things that just aren't right. People that leave are branded as terrible, and bad mouthed.

  
  Sadly in my conditioned bigotry, that's exactly how I used to feel! I saw it in a very black and white fashion - they left because they don't "love Jehovah" - Jehovah and the Watchtower Society being interchangeable entities.

  Brilliant post (((Sadie)))!
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  gsx1138

  I've been shunned a few times in public by my "friends". Usually I would laugh out loud at them and they would get embarassed at the draw of attention.
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  copsec

  Whenever I see some in public and they look down their long noses at me, I usually say very loudly to the person with me, "Oh there's So and so, look they are looking at me like I am trash cause I don't go to their church anymore. But wait, they have a kid who is in prison for theft, or oh, he got convicted as a child molester (or whatever the case may be). I say,"I wonder how they can look at me when they have done those thing!"" Usually, they get very red in the face and walk away quickly. I know it's rude of me to do but how dare they act better than me!!!!
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  calamityjane

  Joy2bfree

  Very well put! I agree with everything you said. What pompous, arrogant people they come off as, but I'm sure they don't see themselves that way. (Did we when we were one of them?)

  Pompous and arrogant are my feelings exactly. When you see the arrogant bast$%*ds out shopping they look down their nose at you. Gets my blood pressure raised a bit. But after being part of this board now for a couple of weeks makes me better to cope with their attitudes and actually I can hardly wait to see one now, because I'm the one now that will hold my head up high and feel sorry for them because they are the poor sorry pitiful ones left blinded by the now so bright light. HA!

  P.S. My husband just added to my feelings. When we were in the borg we were afraid of "apostates" . That's how they feel now. I'd like to go up to one in the grocery aisle and say "BOO" and watch them fill their attends. hehehehe
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  Mum

  Good for you, Sadie. I agree with the refusal to be shunned. If you are in a public place and greet them with a happy smile and they turn their grumpy, self-righteous countenance away, who looks like an a**h***?

  In fact, one of the reasons I had to get out was the realization that I had been a better, kinder, more understanding person in my pre-dub life. It became hard for me to live with myself trying to follow the Watchtower dictates (aka "suggestions") on how to deal with people who might happen to choose to dress attractively or have a relationship with a decent person who was not a JW or other ridiculous WT edicts.

  Regards,

  SandraC
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  calamityjane

  (((MUM)))

  In fact, one of the reasons I had to get out was the realization that I had been a better, kinder, more understanding person in my pre-dub life. It became hard for me to live with myself trying to follow the Watchtower dictates (aka "suggestions") on how to deal with people who might happen to choose to dress attractively or have a relationship with a decent person who was not a JW or other ridiculous WT edicts.

  MUM this is so true. I can honestly say I had a hardened heart for ones that looked or dressed different when I was in the borg. Now that I'm out, I don't judge ones that dress or look different. I am free to think for myself and decide for myself

  Edited by - calamityjane on 9 February 2003 13:35:11
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  foreword

  I've been disfellowshiped for 20 years now....at first i would just get out of their way....I didn't hate them. For a long time i wasn't exposed to the "apostate propaganda" about how they truly are, the internet didn't exist, so I didn't know and still thought they were perfect. I tried a few times to get reinstated but everytime I noticed their lack of empathy and forgiveness, so I thought it better to just move on. My familly is there and I have had very little to do with them. Actually I have spoken to my sister once for two hours in 20 years. Her and her husband are special pioneers, you know, the ones whose shit don't stink.

  When I finally came across information that put to light their true personalities it was I who shunned them, they sense it and hate it too. But deep down I pity them, pity the way they have allowed themselves to become. No way in hell would Jesus act that way. He might choose to shun, but in rare and extreme situations, and always be willing to help you through your handicaps, if you'd be willing to do so.

  So what I do is hold their stare for maybe 5 seconds, look em deep in the eye, but show no emotion or arrogance. Just straight faced...just like you were looking through them (is there someone there kinda look....haha). At that point you will feel time freeze (they are expecting you to look down, and subdue, cause after all you are dealing with a saint), they are the ones supposed to shun you and are waiting for your acknowledgement of this. So at the right moment, before they realize you're not giving in, disconnect sideways, don't look down but just turn your head away, just as if nothing was there. If you pay attention, the moment you start turning you head you will see the expression of defeat on their face. Wait two seconds....cause they can't believe and are still frozen in disbelief....look at them again but this time with your smile of victory. Quite fun and very powerful actually. And they won't like you for it, which further proves the fact that they are wrong in their attitudes.