by fulano 26 Replies latest jw experiences
and I feel sad. Everything happened so fast, 1999 back from Patterson, 2000 inactive and no longer an elder, 2001 smoking everything that planet earth offers, and now in love with a girl for a couple of months. I feel sad but liberated.
Do you know that feeling that you have to cut even the last link to WT??
Edited by - fulano on 11 February 2003 10:50:11
Edited by - fulano on 11 February 2003 10:50:40
Yeppers, that is pretty fast. Kids involved? Welcome to freedom buddy.
No kids...that's one good thing that missionary-service gave me.
I didn't cut all my ties. Kept the wife and kid.
Good luck. I'm sure a failed marriage has as much to do with the relationship as it does with the society.
Fulano - with things changing so fast & furious, are you sure that leaving your wife is the right thing to do at the moment? Sure this girl you've fallen in love with may represent all the things you "want" in your new found freedom away from the Borg, but could it be that caught up in all the passion & excitement for living, are you sure this girl doesn't just represent some of those things?
I don't know what your relationship is with your wife - but you did take vows. Don't throw away a marriage simply because you think something's "better" - it usually isn't - just different.
But congrats on the freedom - just be sure this is what you really want to do - you said it makes you sad...how do you think your wife will feel (if she's one that's worth worrying about & not some cold-hearted adulterous "witch" or something)
You're in love with a girl for a couple of months? Are you sure it's love? Not infatuation, not lust? Remember that a lot of what you believed has been shattered and it does make you question everything including your marriage. But just because you met some sweet young thing that makes you feel good about yourself does not mean that it is true love. I know. I speak from experience. I went through that. But I lived through it and realized that my marriage was actually one of the better things to try to hold on to. Meeting someone new can make you feel alive or younger or something, but it doesn't mean your wife or marriage is no good. Granted, we don't know all the details, nor do I want to, but I sensed that you are going through something I went through and I personally am so grateful that I did not end my marriage because of somebody I met while vulnerable. Just something to think about.
Thanks Petty and Undercover, but the unhappy feeling with her is not new it has been for years, and I don't think that true love really exists...it's just..feeling good and have a good time.
After 8 years of marriage to my husband - and alot of stress & aggrevations & "not feeling good" along the way - I can assure you - real love does exist.
If this is truly your outlook on marriage - I would suggest you never marry or even "commit" to another woman again. I certainly wouldn't take vows to love, honor & cherish through good & bad until death do us part if you don't understand what those words mean.
If "love" to you is just feeling good & having a good time - why do you feel sad at the thought of leaving your wife?
Just what I'm thinking , but "true" love is about sticking through thick and thin and working as a couple as well as on yourselves.. Even in a marriage etc. you're still an individual.. No marriage, relationship, or friendship is ever perfect and there is rough spots along the way even with the best relationships. The ones that survive and thrive is when BOTH people work at it. Its not the length of time that you're with someone- you could be married for 50 years and it could have been a living hell the whole time. On the outside everyone glorifies wow they've been married for 50 years , what a great marriage, yeah right it could be a big sham as well. The important thing is to be honest with yourself also, there's nothing worse than lying to yourself and living a lie. I've been thorugh certain experiences and I'm not that old( 30 in April)...
---I'll make it my own way, trying to learn from my mistakes, cause I got no role model , no footsteps I can follow, I'll make it my own way--- "Role Model" - H2O
wish you the best....i know it cannot be easy......
