by HowTheBibleWasCreated 34 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
What Anders said: Could be dangerous...all it takes for them is to end the conversation with: "Do you still believe the GB is Gods spirit directed FDS forcefeeding truth to Jehovah's holy people?" and their sheperding call changes into an apostate search and destroy party.
Of course I will hit these guys with biblical textual issues, an biology to where they are stunned
The attitude you display could make a big difference to your wife. If you come out with both guns blazing and are obviously just trying to show up the elders, you'll come across to your wife as an obvious apostate, one who was merely pretending to have sincere doubts. It may just put her on her guard against you and could destroy any chance you have of reaching her.
Be careful!
justme2 is right,
if shes really into it, and you have a barrage of questions, you will alienate her, this might damage your relationship.
If the elders have not visited you , put them off as long as possible. perhaps they will give up.
only once in my whole 30 years being in it, had the elders stopped by to see me, and it was random, they were 'out in service' , and I couldn't really talk, my son was upstairs.
it was a short visit, 'were sorry you are having marriage problems and sorry we lost your publisher card hope to see you at the meeting...' then it was 'well we have a funeral to go to'...
never heard from anyone again. but then, Im a woman, and meaningless ,lol
Not knowing your status in the cong, perhaps, you can somehow avoid any religious discussion with her or anyone, treat her with the utmost love, and understanding, just be ' busy'.
believe me, the way I saw people treat each other and how my own family, was treated, and the attitudes displayed, made me wonder decades ago. its the behavior that pulls a lot of people out. she will be a witness to how people treat you, and perhaps start the ball rolling in her mind.
I figure, If my faith and knowledge is 'strong' , and its the truth, nothing is going to sway me, and so that's why I decided to start to research.
hopefully she will be the one to ask a question now and then , make it brief until you know her intent. usually when wives or husbands are complaining about something, that's a good indication something is churning. But rather than let her know you have already looked into answers, have a joint effort to 'discover' answers together. this way she cannot blame you for anything.
best of luck.
Hello HTBWC, I am in the same boat has you. for me, i would not entertain this idea. like another poster said...all it takes is the stupid question about the GB and driving this boat.
for me....i really don't know what to do. i keep hoping something will cause her to open her eyes.
to me it's like this.
she says: i need to lose weight
i say: try exercising, try weight watchers.
she says: i will do it when i am good and ready.
yep, when she is ready to see it for what it is, if ever. then she will. i will just have to sit and wait or move on.
but believe me....she know 100% how i feel about the cult.
Merry Christmas.
Risky.
Getting a loved one out of the religion can take years. It can take years and years.
Two of the best ways to fail are:
A. Rushing things
B. Appeals to facts, reason and logic.
The attitude you display could make a big difference to your wife.
I was successful discussing issues with my wife because at the time doing this I was very sincere and searching for the answers to my doubts. I was not dogmatic. I was not a "know-it-all". I was anxious and emotionally disturbed about the issues I had discovered -- things that did not add up in WTS. Everything I had been taught and believed in my life were being turned upside-down.
When she tried to reason on the issues, she came to the same conclusion -- It's all Bullshit. We had been suckered.
Baby steps.
Doc
My main issue is she knows I have doubts.... I have refused to tell her what they are until the time is right.
Meanwhile I dont want meetings, service etc in my life. I also hate praying to Jablooper at meals.
She doesnt drive so of I miss a meeting...she does... and gets mad at me about it.
So for me to exit fully is impossible almost.
I asked about confronting the elders for two reasons:
It is a subtle way to let her know my doubts
The so-called secret elder book says elders may address genuine doubters and such are not apostates..
As for the governing body questionI will simply quote Jackson and state that is Br. Jacksons staement under oath.
There was a participant here who went by the handle jgnat, (She was married married to a JW man) and her advice on this subject was solid gold.
Every single thing I'd ever tried with my JW wife had failed. jgnat's advice worked. Her approach was simply to help the good person trapped inside the JW shell to come out. Little things, like secretly handing out Halloween candy to delighted children. Bigger things, like cultivating friendships with good and kind people who are not JW's. These things have much more impact than facts.
I think your approach follows that pattern, but you're going to need a real a$$hole of an elder to act as a foil in the conversation. If you get a patient and/or nice one, you might not have the contrast you need.
You have to be very clear about your motives and what you're hoping to accomplish by doing this because with JW's, no matter what you do, there's a good chance you'll be viewed the same as the guy who announces to a room full of children on Dec 24th that there's no such thing as Santa Claus.
People often want to be lied to and want to believe the little stories that get them through the night and they will go to great lengths to be able to continue believing them and to punish anyone who brings this to their attention.
