Wow there's some really good comments in here, much more content to ponder. Much appreciated. I especially like the comments from those who've improved since leaving, found purpose in giving, and seeing the love/beauty in life etc.
To answer some questions:
I've been out the org. for around 4 years now. It's been one monumental change after another, including many deaths in family (father etc). During that time my wife and I have almost lost our home. We've fallen out with JW family members too (felt betrayed after all we did for them). Pretty intense stuff (waking up from a cult, being shunned etc). Fortunately I'm still young enough (early thirties) to make something of my life, so there's that.
Some have mentioned about basically "doing stuff" that brings meaning - I'd agree and would generally have given that same advice to others. However in my case the funny thing is that I'm a highly driven person and already feel pretty accomplished (to **some** degree). In the process of starting up a business at the moment (for example). Albeit, I think that this ambitious nature makes me more prone to depression since I'm my own worst enemy - a perfectionist. I believe my main problem at the moment is over-working and imbalance (to the point of having zero social life). Got a one track mind that's great for getting things done, but very easy at becoming obsessive. That includes the study of psychology/philosophy. I get to the point of frustration, and almost feel like I'm living some cruel game and want to reach to the "next level".
One of my future endeavours (once emotions etc have settled) is to put my energy into philanthropic pursuits. Not so much in just donating money to people (think that's kind of "distant"), but more in ways of giving people the tools they need to improve their lives (ranging from cheaper housing to simple farm land in poorer countries etc). Or even some sort of organisation for ex JWs giving psychological help (something for every city) - that's something dear to me. Only problem is that in order to help I need to help myself! I need to have my sh*t together but sometimes fall prey to phases of hopelessness. This thread was more about feedback than completely "propping me up". It's just so nice to get a wider perspective.
Times without a caring relationship seem the most meaningless.
I think this is probably one of the biggest issues. Humans need to feel connected; we could do everything possible in the world (be brilliant at whatever pursuit), but if we feel "alone" it would be futile. You can be around so many people and still feel alone. Yet in a healthy relationship with someone (or people) it's like there's a cover-up hormone that dispels negativity - a switch inside your mind.
