Anyone struggle to find meaning in life?

by Good JW 48 Replies latest jw experiences

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  zophar

  Really enjoying all these thoughtful comments.

  Even as a JW the preaching was mainly about who was right and finding the true religion, and not about what was right, how to live a meaningful life.

  So much of what is recorded of what Jesus was supposed to have taught was about improving your quality of life. Don't be anxious, be forgiving, do unto others, all are great life principles that can add meaning to life. Instead as a JW, it was, do more you are not doing enough works, teach that you and your religion have all the answers.

  JW's who lived 100 years ago thought they were just as close to the end and the future paradise as the JW's today. What is wrong with this picture? Like someone said earlier enjoy the pie now.
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  Good JW

  Sorry if you are depressed, and I hope that you find your answers if that's what matters to you. To answer your question, no, I don't struggle with that. I have more important things to do in my life than wasting it looking for its "meaning".

  Hi scratchme1010, I have some dark periods, but wouldn't describe myself as depressed. Definitely had severe depression in my early 20's but managed to deal with it through self help, supplements and the occasional medical treatment (didn't last last since I hated the side effects). Nowadays it's more like Winter blues, and I know how to stop myself brooding on thoughts that lead to the darkest places.

  Partly I get down when I feel confused because I like to think I've got all the answers lol. Constantly thinking about life. Like to be in control, and am a natural problem solver. However, like I said, mostly I've become imbalanced from working too much (not left time for rest/leisure/socialisation) - and that's the biggest cause for feeling empty. When you're having fun with friends etc you just don't care so much about these questions; it just feels right.
  

  Some have said in here that they don't have time/mental space for pondering life's meaning - I just don't get that. Obviously it's healthy to have enough activities/friends to distract you, but I can't see how this question isn't somewhat important as surely it shapes how you live your life now? Otherwise we're just "existing" (trying to survive like an animal) and that's it?

  Admittedly, this same line of reasoning is a bit like "who created God" when a religionists says life couldn't have created itself. If I were to say that "surely life has an ultimate purpose/goal", then one could say but what makes that goal meaningful? And the circular nature goes on until one has to just say "it is what it is". All I can say is that there is truth in the whole "more happiness in giving than receiving", and at least for me that's one step ahead of "just existing" (doing what you can to survive).
  
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  Good JW

  Brokeback Watchtower:
  

  
  

  I'm looking for the meaning in life but deep down I know that there is not a universal meaning for everyone of the human species, and that each one has to find his own personal "meaning", I look at it as worthy goal but so far even though I'm 65 I haven't nailed down my meaning for life, but maybe just the goal to finding the meaning of life could offer me a personal meaning for my life? Either way I need to keep searching for it, because I feel that it is a noble task worthy of my attention.

  Facing the issue of total inihilation awaits us in death I think can be a good motivator for us living the most we can while we are alive if one can learn to turn off the anxiety or dread of dying and face reality.

  Thanks for those videos, really summed up much of how I think. Generally been an "out of the box" person, never had too much desire to blend (other than for social conventions/politeness).
  

  From a purely theoretical point of view in pondering life's purpose/meaning, I've kind of narrowed down my search to 2 main areas - that of love (which distinguishes us from instinctive animals), and personality (which causes us to express love in various forms). So yes, while love is a selfless expression of regard for others, personality is our way of individualising that love. Some have said that one must find our own purpose, and that's where individuality comes in. However, the expression of both together seems to be the ultimate combo (true freedom). It's only logical really; love is needed but true love cannot be expressed or received with gratitude by anything other than an individual. The more individual the person is, the more distinguished from an automatic/meaningless program they can become. The more loving they become (another form of beauty), the better they can fulfil their potential. All these directions/goals give the potential for growth = meaning/value.
  

  May seem corny/hippy-like or cliche to most, or even leaving yet more questions...but I feel it's about the only redeeming value of life as it currently stands. Ultimately though, experience is the real litmus test. Talk is cheap :)
  
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  flipper

  Hey Good JW, I understand your feelings as I was a born-in JW from birth ( exited 14 years ago at age 44 ) . In my years after escaping from Jehovah's Witnesses I've come to the conclusion that at least for myself- that the meaning of life is living each and every day to the full with love and spreading good vibes enjoying living in the ' here and now ' .

  What I mean by that is as JW's we were always conditioned in our minds to think " this life is temporary " - or - " this is not the real life, the real life will be living forever in paradise ". Which is absolute BS in my opinion. This life we are living IS the real life ! There most probably never will be a " forever " so we have to make the best of each and every day we live in this life- it's the only life we have !

  So I've enjoyed pursuing interests like playing music, writing songs, hiking in the mountains, photography, other exciting things to do in life on the side while of course still running my business as a self employed business owner. We have to take life by the reins and grab it in a positive way caressing and cherishing each and every day . My view of life at the end of my life someday will be much like the Beatles final words on their final Abbey Road album - " And in the end the love you take, is equal to the love you make. " We will only get out of life - what we put back into it regards to relationships in love of others, love of ourselves, respecting others rights, while pursuing our life interests all the while taking an interest in others as well as always learning something new until the day we die.

  I feel I'll never get to a point where " I know it all " - I don't believe that's possible. But we can stay engaged in learning and experiencing new things in life along this magnificent journey until the end. Kind of how I see things
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  Good JW

  Hi Flipper. Yeah a few others have mentioned too about as a JW you are conditioned to put life on pause. I lost sight of that fact, but remember now the elated feeling knowing that I can live in the here and now. It's easy to forget how much better life is now than before! Just the simple fact knowing that you don't have to schedule your whole week around meetings/preparation etc is enough in itself.
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  flipper

  Good JW- I totally agree. It's a wonderful thing actually having a couple days on the weekend to chill and relax when many of us didn't used to have that chance for years inside the Witnesses . Freedom of movement is sweet indeed ! Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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  Stealth

  Many great comments so far.

  If you feel you need more purpose in life, you don't have to look far. Foster some children who need an adult to look after them, or better yet, adopt a child. What greater purpose could there be then making a difference in the life of one single child. Someone has to do it, why not us?

  I was shocked at how many children are waiting to be adopted in my state. Yes many come with issues, but there are also many smaller children. You can specify what age or sex you are willing to foster. We fostered twins at 4 months, then adopted them at 4 years. There is no time for depression or wondering what greater purpose we have in life. We are living it every day and it feels great to make a life altering difference in young persons lives who would otherwise be tossed aside, neglected or abused.

  From a Christian perspective, Jesus told his followers to look after widows and orphans. I am a follower of Jesus even though I never set foot in a church or Kingdom Hall.

  Best to you in your quest.
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  mentalclarity

  @ Good JW -"I think this is probably one of the biggest issues. Humans need to feel connected; we could do everything possible in the world (be brilliant at whatever pursuit), but if we feel "alone" it would be futile"

  I think isolation and disconnection are some of the greatest factors that contribute to feeling a lack of meaningfulness in your life. I had a few weeks vacation and most of my friends traveled while I spent alot of time alone without my usual social contacts. It was rough...I had alot of time to over-think and kind of wallow in some disappointments. This is not my usual state- I know there is merit in enjoying time to re-energize and be on your own, but the truth is, too much alone time is not good.

  I find it very rewarding if I can be around people and feel like I'm contributing or helping in some way. It's more about what I can bring to the interaction, than what I can get from it. Maybe for you talking chit chat can be superficial and frivolous, but for someone else, maybe it's the only human interaction they had all day. A shift in focus goes a long way. That's how I've found meaning in my life.

  I think especially coming from a JW background you have to find a way to replace that feeling that you were helping people improve their lives by teaching them about the bible (I know that's what I thought I was doing). There's a big void when you leave and it was important for me to find a way to fill that up and still stay true to my values and current beliefs.
  
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  Good JW

  Stealth - that's a wonderful commitment you've made! If my wife and I can't have children, that'll be our next move (adoption). I am a firm believer in the (better) principles of Christian living.

  Mentalclarity - yes that's my problem lately; too much alone time (although I spend plenty of time with people at work, it's not the same as a close friend). Think that Christmas brought it home to me more, felt really out of place with my wife's family (we have nothing in common). Small talk is something I get a lot of so it feels like pulling out teeth now lol. Can't really get into it, it's just part of my personality. I'm the sort of person who's not affraid to ask questions and really delve deep into a conversation, even with people I don't know much about. Like you said about your previous life as a JW and the bible, it feels good to talk about something meaningful. That's never left me.