by lisavegas420 17 Replies latest jw friends
Thank you all for your kind replys. I usually don't feel sorry for myself, but since they called my first, I thought they were extending a loving hand. I was wrong.
I feel much better now, I now know what unconditional love and friendship is.
And with the help of my husband, children and friends like you all, I will survive.
Love you all,
Lisa
I've heard similar stories - people deliberately hiding from the uglier articles about child abuse or the violent experiences. Makes sense now, I guess.
You didn't do anything wrong, hun. They just had a moment of realization.
CZAR
An update...........
I printed this thread out and um....carried it across the room to my husband to read...He was reading along when he got to Maverick 's post he laughed out loud and said ..."J-Dub"....... got to Big Tex's post ....and the tears were rolling down his face....
Next....my children came home from KY....they said being at my parents was so weird...that even though everyone was home...Dad, Mom, and my two brothers....18 and 20...that they didn't talk to each other...they were nice and friendly to MY children but kinda ignored each other.
My 18 year old brother and my son (also 18) got along great...My son invited him up here to visit us and also told my brother "You need to get to know your sister, I know she would be a great sister because she is the coolest Mom ever" (isn't that sweet) My 18 years old brother is also deep into Martial Arts...I found that more than a little strange being that my Dad has been as elder for 30 years or so. But I'm glad he has a distraction away from the JW life. There is hope!
Lisa
Lisa
Thank you for your kind words. I am touched that your husband heard what I had to say, even though he never knew Bill. Still in a way, I think he did, just by seeing what is going on in your own family.
How sad that your mother and father refuse to acknowledge their own children. I cannot imagine treating my son and daughter as if they were a piece of furniture. I don't care if God himself said I should, I would not. I cannot conceive of a God of love condoning, or encouraging that sort of behavior.
I'm very glad to hear your brother and your son seem to be developing a relationship. Isn't it amazing the power of love? Despite everything, family (real family, not that Witness kind) and genuine affection can conquer anything. I believe the secret to life is finding a way to attach yourself to that part of the world, rather than the dark and dreary (and sometimes evil) part of the world.
Just my opinion.
Take care,
Chris
This is what I always wonder with parents that are like this to their own children:
When the father is lying on his death bed, will he wonder why none of his family is there to comfort him?
Will he be saddened by the fact that no one cares enough about him to see him during his last hours of life?
Will he be deep in thought as to WHY no one cares about him?
Will he then realize what an asshole he has been his entire life?
Will he realize that it is now 'HIS fault' that he is on his death bed and alone with no one to sympathise?
Will he realize the errors of his ways?
Will he then beg forgiveness from God for his unloving actions?
Will he ask that his son or daughter come to be with him before he dies?
Will he beg forgiveness from his son/daughter?
Will the son/daughter forgive him and show him the love that was NEVER shown to them, giving them love and respect that they NEVER earned and have no right to and hold the father in their arms as he passes on?
Or will the son/daughter kneel down beside their dying father, take his hand in their's, look him in the eye and say, "You are only asking forgiveness to clear your conscience and to save face before God because you know that you WILL BE held accountable to God for shutting me out of your life and for having no natural affection or love of any kind. I have begged for a relationship with you for decades and each time you have treated me less than dirt. You have made no effort of any kind to show any love towards me whatsoever. You have, in effect, disowned me. And only now, as you lay here dying, do you see the error of your ways.
Now you know what it has been like for me all these years, as I lay dying inside as you shunned me and turned your back on me. THIS is how it feels. I want you to remember that this is all your fault now. You are now harvesting the fruit of your labor of hatred and I want you to take a big bite and savor the taste of it. I want you to think long and hard about the scriptures that talk about bearing false witness against another, about how Jesus would say to those like you, "Get away from me you workers of lawlessness. I never knew you," and about having natural love amonst each other.
This is the end result of all of your hard work. I hope it was worth it. You have turned your back on me long ago. Pray that God will have mercy on your own unforgiving soul because you will recieve none from me."
And then turn around and walk away, leaving them to die alone, as alone as the son/daughter has been for the last 20 years.
I think about things like this alot and it makes me very glad to know that I am very close to my mother and step father and how they have always been there for me and shown me the greatest love and respect anyone could ever hope for. And I would be there for them any time they needed me, especially when it comes for their time to leave this earth.
yea...that's right..I'm btt'n this back to the top.
So much is the same. I'm still married to the same man, still have my children in my life.; Parent still doing the shunning thing; then even moved away without telling me.
But some things are different.....I now have 3 grandchildren; and I heard my dad had cancer, a stroke, and a pacemaker.
Yet when I read the above posts I feel totally different. I don't feel responsible for them as a matter of fact even though the first time I read this, I was somewhat uncomfortable, now I read it and can laugh.
Or will the son/daughter kneel down beside their dying father, take his hand in their's, look him in the eye and say, "You are only asking forgiveness to clear your conscience and to save face before God because you know that you WILL BE held accountable to God for shutting me out of your life and for having no natural affection or love of any kind. I have begged for a relationship with you for decades and each time you have treated me less than dirt. You have made no effort of any kind to show any love towards me whatsoever. You have, in effect, disowned me. And only now, as you lay here dying, do you see the error of your ways. Now you know what it has been like for me all these years, as I lay dying inside as you shunned me and turned your back on me. THIS is how it feels. I want you to remember that this is all your fault now. You are now harvesting the fruit of your labor of hatred and I want you to take a big bite and savor the taste of it. I want you to think long and hard about the scriptures that talk about bearing false witness against another, about how Jesus would say to those like you, "Get away from me you workers of lawlessness. I never knew you," and about having natural love amonst each other.
This is the end result of all of your hard work. I hope it was worth it. You have turned your back on me long ago. Pray that God will have mercy on your own unforgiving soul because you will recieve none from me."
That's it... Just sharing. Well 'cause I can.
lisa
Congratulations on coming such a long way, lisa!
Jackie
Wow, that was four years ago. Amazing.
Nina
