Rebel8 - Horrible story about that young woman, even for JW. Disgusting and evil.
d4g
Making friends in the "truth"
by Jordandemm 28 Replies latest jw friends
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done4good
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Doubtfully Yours
Oh, I have many an "associate", and the same is true that I need time in the week and weekend to cover all the invites my family receives for JW fun events. However, any perceived misstep against the WTBTS and everybody will back away and the invitations will cease immediately.
For as long as we are perceive to be JWs in good standing things will continue to be peachy.
Friendship among JWs is just an illusion. I understand it and accept it.
DY
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Londo111
It distressed me when I thought it was the truth and couldn't understand why the "most loving people on earth" were excluding me. Now it makes perfect sense! -
sparrowdown
Not possible to be friends with a JW - not in the true sense of the word.
It wasn't until I accepted the truth of that statement did it stop bothering me.
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BlackWolf
Dude I know how you feel. Im 16 and the only "friend' I really have is a 50 year old sister at my Cong who I go ride horses with sometimes. People don't like her either because she still hangs out with her worldly family and actually does fun stuff instead of going out in service all the time. I've given up on making any new friends at the hall because the other kids are all judgemental, hypocritical idiots! I've never been anything but nice to any of them but they still treat me like an outcast even though I've never done anything wrong! Really Jehovah's witnesses are some if the worst people I've ever been around. -
sparrowdown
They are horrible people. I don't why people say they're soooo nice.
Yeah, if you find fake, back-stabbing, gossip mongers to be "nice."
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Dunedain
As many here have perfectly touched on already, it is IMMPOSSIBLE to make TRUE friends in the WTS. Now, of course, we know there are always exceptions to this rule, but, unfortunately, it is the norm.
When you have a "group" of people, who's lives are intertwined together, but in a very high control, fear driven, conditional, setting. it makes for strictly unhealthy relationships.
Most TRUE feelings are suppressed, out of "fear" of being turned in to the elders. Many are literally "acting" how they perceive, that they need to be perceived, by the others there. All relationships are not based on mutual respect, admiration, or love, but are CONDITIONAL on "standing", whims of the day, and how the elders think everyone should act.
The kingdom halls are festering grounds of gossip, and cliques, and back stabbing people. Everyone, from the minor children, to the baptized pre-teens, to the 20, 30, 40 somethings, to the older ones, are ALL JOCKEYING FOR POSITION AND PRIVILEGE.
It creates an atmosphere of, I am better, because I have this privilege, or that privilege. I was baptized first, or I gave talks younger, or I am a pioneer, or a servant, or an Elder. Its all based on BULLSHIT titles.
At the end of the day, the people there are NOT true friends, it is all based on fake, shallow, ideals.
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Slidin Fast
It is very hard to have true friends. My family once became good friends with another from a good distance away. They had a lovely fun loving lively daughter and we all got on really well. A few months later they cam to stay for the weekend. No daughter! She had been DFd. Her dad told me he thought the elders had made the wrong decision but didn't do anything about iy because of his prominent position. Friend? I could hardly speak to him for the rest of the weekend. That's the issue you see, conditional love. F**k Em!
I refuse to use an electronic device for meetings and service. It is annoying! As a "stuck in" that's the best thing for me. No meeting bag, bible or other crap. I can check out what I like on the KH wifi. It makes the meetings bearable.
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Tricked
My time spent as a JW was the loneliest, most depressing episode of my life. I gave up my worldly, true friends to associate with these people. I do regret all the excuses I made and generally being too busy in "the truth" to spend time with people who genuinely cared, accepted and loved me.
I always felt an outsider looking in on the KH cliques wondering why I couldn't share this great friendship that everyone appeared to have. People seemed slightly suspicious of a single-in-the-truth sister (even though I was married) and didn't want their kids associating with my kids. My son commented the other day that the kids at school were nicer, kinder, friendlier than the kids from the Hall, but he knew he shouldn't really be friends with kids from school:-(.
My son took the news that I was no longer going to meetings with relief and anger. He feels that he was made to be different because of my beliefs that he could see were wrong the whole time. I've got major amends to make.