Urban Legends!

by ISP 56 Replies latest jw friends

  • ISP
    ISP

    Anyone hear this? I searched the CDROM but could find no trace so I guess it was a good ole UL!

    A Jesuit gets the truth in a South American country. But he sees the 'light' or something and gets the 'truth'. They send out another Jesuit.......who likewise gets involved and another is sent and another is converted.......and so it goes on. It stops when the Jesuit Branch Overseer Type Dude(whatever).......decides not to send any more out for fear more will be lost. Such is the overwelming power of the kingdom message.

    hmmm......

    ISP

  • Skimmer
    Skimmer

    The following is not really WTBTS urban legend material; it's better filed under the topic of speculative beliefs:

    1) It is sometimes possible to detect demon possessed people because they had a visible extra shine to their eyes.

    2) With regard to planetary orbits, Newton, Kepler, and Einstein had it all wrong. Each planet has an angel assigned to it that provides guidance and motive power.

    Did either of these have some initial cause in WTBTS literature? They both were known by word of mouth in the early 1970s United States.

  • wheelwithinwheel
    wheelwithinwheel

    At a district ass. prior to ’75 we listened to a tower-sponsored speaker urging us to make sure not to end up being « a grape » in Jehovah’s great wine-press. He reminded us that the depth of blood would be so deep that horses would have to just about swim.

    Then the great revelation : Apparently some North American scientists had discovered an amazing phenomena. Eagles, vultures and other birds of prey were doubling production, producing enormous amounts of eggs, and these flesh-eating carnivores were suddenly becoming much more numerous. Now it seemed that these poor ignorant scientists just couldn’t explain the sudden changes in these bird’s reproductive cycles. With a gleam in his eye, the speaker thundered, « But we, Jehovah’s people, know why, don’t we now ? ... Brothers, these birds of prey are being gathered. Gathered for God’s great evening meal, to feast on the flesh of ... » . Everyone in the audience drew a rapid breath, then slowly exhaled at this indisputable proof that the end was so very near.

    We young ones decided it was time to get baptized if we didn’t want our eyes pecked- out.

  • LDH
    LDH

    Wheel, I have almost shat myself with laughter. Because we had a sister in our cong. who announced the exact same thing, only during the WT study! That's apparently why the Crows were gathering around Central NY! And, there was an Army base not too far down the road from the KH, which explained why the crows would roost in the trees nearby--they wouldn't have to travel far to feast!

    It makes sense now! Someone needs to write to National Geographic, who did a story 2 years ago on the surge in the number of crows in Upstate NY.

    I'm sure they would LOVE to know the real reason why!

    Wheels, that was classic.

    This one was related around 1990 at an Assembly in Syracuse NY:

    Anyone hear the one about the little old 90+ sister who wanted to witness in the back country? (I believe this 'happened' in South America). NONE of the local bros or sis would take her, because it was too dangerous. So she asked a local Hell's Angel group for a ride! (And don't forget, these were dangerous looking men) So she rode on the back of the leader's Hog (Harley Davidson Motorcycle for you non-US'rs) to deliver the truth!

    The gang members were so impressed that she wasn't afraid of them, that she was able to start a study right then, and conduct it with 12 hellish-looking gang members!

    Of course, her whole congregation was put to shame because of their fear of preaching the good news!

    What I want to know is, How'd somebody in Nicaragua get a Harley?!?!?!

  • Wounded Heart
    Wounded Heart

    LMAO SanFranJim! loved that one! makes a good jw joke if you ask me.

    ISP - heard your jesuit UL many years ago.

    Wheel - heard the crows growing bigger & multiplying UL many yrs ago

    Prisca & Jelly - about the "austrailian" bombing: i dont remember where or when it was supposed to have happened. the version i read was that everyone was looking at bible and thus all but 1 in frt row were saved when the NAIL BOMB went off. and that the nails would have blinded everyone in the eyes. the speaker was "standing on top" of the bomb and was thrown clear. the bomb was made up of nails that shot out like bullets everywhere when it went off. thats how i heard it. there may have been more but i dont remember anything else right now.

    Wounded Heart

    Love by giving to & accepting others unconditionally = true, pure love

  • SlayerLayer
    SlayerLayer

    San Fran Jim-- I have not laughed that hard in a long time.

    What about the guy who broke into a JW's house and robbed it. Months later at an assembly the brother is approached by a man handing him a bible that had his name written in it. The thief had stolen the bible months earlier and learned the "truth".

    Must not have been able to get anything for it at the pawn shop, I guess.

    "Forget the tribe, my pants have spoken."

  • Bangalore
    Bangalore

    Bump.

    Bangalore

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