The" Letter" returns

Yesterdays Child

Last night when I got home from work low and behold my mother-in-law you know the one who wrote me "the letter" was sitting in my living room eating my food going over my wifes talk with her . I went in my room took off my work clothes and came out and told her I have a problem with this. you told me you could no longer talk or eat or socialize with me so why are you here in my home? She said She thought I understood and she was there to help here daughter with her talk. I said that then your daughter my wife should go to your home and do whatever.No one will be in my home who does not speak to me. She said that she thought that it was ok for her to be there because I did not tell her in point terms I guess. Well last night she got it OUT that way to the door. Meanwhile wifey decides to start yelling at me. Saying that if I didn't want her in the house I should have told her 7 months ago when I got the letter ( post page 83) . I told you; and since she doesnt talk to me maybe you shoulld have told her. Anyway I hope this does not stop our trip to New Orleans for our anniversary .Right now it don't look good. Oh well thanks for listening.

Fire Dragon

You did the right thing! Tell her that when she's ready to treat you like part of the family again then you'll reconsider.

FD (Damn self righteous JWs!)

ChrisVance

Sorry to hear what you're going thru. Jdubs are so insensitive that they think it's perfectly within their rights to go to your house and shun you. It shouldn't have to be spelled out to anyone who has a tiny bit consideration for a fellow human being. Stick to your guns.

Francois

You did the right thing. And your wife is supposed to continue to regard you as her "head" if she's to be a good little JW. Them's the rules; perhaps she's forgotten them.

francois

JamesThomas

As in your original thread on this matter ("Got this letter"), I seem to be the contrarian. My suggestion was to kill her with kindness rather than fight back with anger and aggression, justified as it may be. In my view to continue down your chosen path, will only reinforce your mother in-laws view that she did the right thing by cutting you out of her life, and may even destroy your marriage. Allowing ego, pride and anger to rule the day, seldom ends in desirable outcomes. My heart goes out to you on this one; and I realize it is easy for me to armchair quarter-back from a distance. And who knows you may have chosen the right path, and i am dead wrong (wouldn't be the first time). JamesT

ashitaka

Well, I'm glad you stood up for yourself. It's tough to be shunned in your own home. I certainly would have been less diplomatic about it than you.

ash

Sentinel

Your wife lives in and is equal owner of "your" home, together, right? Am I to understand that you have been terribly hurt and angry regarding a letter from your mother-in-law, and so you have made a rule that your wife cannot have her mom visit her in her own home?

Despite how your mother-in-law is regarding you, it is obvious that she is still close to her daughter and that is a good thing. She is just apparently following the dictates of the borg. Unless she is on the "outs" with your wife as well, seems like your wife should be able to have her visit in the home.

Please reconsider your hard rule, as your wife needs her mother and should not be made to feel guilty because of it. There may come a time, when your wife will not be able to speak or associate with her mother, and all the more to your credit, if you will not have played a part in any of the division. Your wife will love you even more for handling the situation with sensitivity, despite how your feelings might be hurt. In turn, your wife, seeing your willingness to to be more reasonable, will probably not take advantage of the situation . (This way, you can still be the head of the house and not lose your status, and you will be loved and respected by your mate.)

Yesterdays Child

Sentinel you need to look at my post Got this letter on page 83

Pleasuredome

You did the right thing. And your wife is supposed to continue to regard you as her "head" if she's to be a good little JW. Them's the rules; perhaps she's forgotten them.

well said francois.

not only that but when man and woman are married, the two flesh become one. how can your mother-in-law treat you with contempt, without sinning against your wife? just another case of the dubs wanting it all their own way without regard for anyone else.

YC, are you welcome in your M-in-L's house if your with your wife?

Yesterdays Child

Ofcourse not Only before I got the letter in Sept of last year

The" Letter" returns

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