^ That is epic advice Jericho.
Stranger in my own house, Since my wife and i don't talk much anymore nor sleep in the same bed. i feel like a stranger.
by goingthruthemotions 61 Replies latest jw experiences
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cognac
Christ Walls, you are pretty smart... Lol -
berrygerry
I suggest opening a safe deposit box and parking cash in there ASAP
Use cash withdrawals at Walmart when you make a purchase to mask the withdrawals.
A friend saw the writing on the wall, and did this, more or less.
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goingthruthemotions
Sabin: you see the problem is this, she thinks because i started off really good and then grew cold. in her mind i let her down and jehovah down. no mention about jesus ( go figure) i guess he doesn't matter.
she was brought up in the cult. left it before i even meet her. she grew up with all the damage that happen to the youth.
she doesn't know how to cummunicate and lacks the ability to show love. always has been this way. looking back i believe this is a result of growing up in the cult. she also doesn't show emotion, nor does she think she has the problem.
i blame it all on the cult.
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stuckinarut2
Yes, GTTM, but you can stop the cycle by showing mildness and calmness, yet still standing your ground for the atmosphere you will allow in YOUR home and family -
berrygerry
It looks like you have woken up hard and fast to TTATT and are expecting your wife to do the same.
IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
My ongoing post:
Remember that truth and logic are not relevant.
Go slow. Have a long-term game plan and chip, chip away.
You can win a frontal attack, and lose the war. Avoid frontal attacks at all costs (including the birthday incident - avoid these things).
All Dubs have been infected with a potent virus that controls their thinking.
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Bill Covert
Yes been there, that was rough. The church policy that non obedient mate is a threat to the spirituality of the faithful mate is a real homewrecker. Personally I conducted myself in such a way that when the day arrives when the reality of the breakup becomes clear I do not have to appologize to my 5 sons. She left the marriage, her blood pressure could not handle the pressure applied by the church that her husband was a wicked person, long story.
You got it rough. My prayer for you is that the financial woes of the church will reach a point to where the church elders she is using for her moral guide will realize the flock is being fleeced. Your problems are not their problems but if they start having problems with what is starting to unfold with the money issues, then their problem has the potential of solving your problem. It was 2004 when my marriage came to its end, today there is a major diffrence as to the internal stability with in the church structure its self. I watch this site very close for the latest happenings and am amazed as to the changes in just the past few months alone. I am in hopes you and many others will have tremendous loads lifted off you with the very real possibility that the church's financial situtation will open the way for men like you to have a opinion in their own house.
Been there and experienced everything you are going through. May Jehovah be with you.
Bill
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Crazyguy
Evaluate your choices carefully with out emotion if you can. What would be the best at getting most if not all of your family out. Go back to meeting and then once looking spiritual again teach your children from the bible the teachings of christ slowly showing your kids the hypocrisy of the borg. Or staying how it is and getting aggressive with teaching and showing your kids whats wrong with the borg, this will probably be much harder especially if they have friends in the hall and its thier whole social world. Plus they see it as pleasing god. Or option 3 leave your wife possibly take kids with you or atleast fight for joint custody.
Im in a similar situation and should have never left. I should of staid and then showed my kids through weekly family worship whats wrong with the Borg. I have since become an athiest and tipped to much of my opinion out there while talking with my oldest son, so i dont think i can go back. This religion become thier whole social and spiritual life and you are fighting against a whole machine with millions of people apart of it. So fighting it is a huge battle.
I personally see that in my case if could save my kids but loose my wife i would take that trade. Right now im loosing all my little battles. The kids see no down side in being in the cult and its thier social world for the most part so they dont want to leave it. You have to pick a plan and go with it long term and along the way maybe even change plans. Theres no easy way and no plan that works perfectly for everyone.
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cognac
Crazy - how old are your kids? -
Crazyguy
5,10,12,14,17