JWs and Education

by cognac 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • cognac
    cognac

    My parents were always of the belief that, "the end is right around the corner".

    I was a zealous kid, with a learning disorder, so my parents never gave me a hard time or pushed me in regards to my education.

    This not only hurt me, but, pissed me off insanely.

    Fast forward to me having my own kid. Ava is not doing well in school. I already work with her 1/2-1 hour a day. She just got signed up for after school help on Mondays and is having a core evaluation done.

    In addition to my help and the schools, I've hired a private tutor for 1 hour a day.

    My mom thinks it's way to much and I'm bombarding my daughter with to much education.

    My feeling is since the extra help is dispersed throughout the day (15-30 min after school, 1 hr with the tutor at 6pm and 1/2 before school) she won't get to overwhelmed and will like school more because she understands what's going on.

    If she doesn't get more help then what I'm able to give her, she will fail. What else am I supposed to do?

    But, I keep second guessing myself trying to make sure I'm not putting my own personal issues on my daughters shoulders.

    Thought I'd ask to get some outside opinions. Thank you.

  • Dissonant15
    Dissonant15
    If the school recommends help, they have the best knowledge of these issues. As far as your daughter's feelings, each child is different. You can observe if she feels better or gets burned out.
  • cognac
    cognac

    Thank you Dissonant. The school didn't recommend the tutor, but, that's what I'd be doing if I didn't have another kid trying to climb over my head at night.

    It equals out to about 2 hours of studying a day, for a 1st grader.

    Ugh, if I get the feeling she's not happy, I'll have to figure something out. But, she enjoys learning as long as she gets breaks and playtime. She's actually excited when she does well and is proud of herself.

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    My mom thinks it's way to much and I'm bombarding my daughter with to much education.

    We pretty much know where your Mom's head is when it comes to education.

    What is your daughter saying ? Is she complaining more than you'd expect and does she seem overwhelmed? I'm not sure how old your daughter is but what you've described, certainly doesn't sound excessive, depending on her age. Maybe you could alternated days with the Tutor.

  • cognac
    cognac

    Thanks Pete. I go as long as I can until she complains, then I give her a break everyday except Friday mornings - because it's the day of the test.

    Ava is 6 years old.

    I usually wake her up at 5:45am because she needs breaks during homework; however, once she has a tutor I will let her sleep until 6:15-6:30, so I can ease up in the mornings a bit.

    I had to get her to bed early, to wake up early because my 3 year old wouldn't interrupt us as much in the mornings.

  • AFRIKANMAN
    AFRIKANMAN

    The efforts will be worth it ......................follow your own head on this one !

    I am a pre-75'er and now at 59 paying the price of listening to others and their cultish advice! But hell life is fun now that we are out !!!!

  • Sabin
    Sabin
    Cognac, she is 6, in what way is she having difficulty, is it reading/writing/arithmetic or is there a problem with her behaviour? Is this someyhing you have just noticed or did your instincts tell you something was wrong erarlier & you didn't want to admit it to yourself. Sorry I know I`m being blunt.
  • cognac
    cognac

    Thank you Afrikan. Sometimes it's hard to figure out balance when you've grown up in a cult. You wind up second guessing things...

    Glad I have this forum for feedback... :)

  • Dunedain
    Dunedain

    I have a 7 year old daughter, myself, and its commendable that you are taking such a huge interest in her well being and education. My wife and i, always stay on top of her work, homework, preparing for tests, and current curriculum. On face value, it does, maybe?, seem like you may be doing a bit much, since she is only 6 and in first grade. However, if your daughter is enjoying the extra work, and is not showing any signs of it being too much, or buning out, then it should be fine. At 6 years old, and in first grade, the work is still basic, but it is the foundation for the next few years to come.

    You want to make sure, she knows her alphabet, and numbers. She should be aware of certain "memory" words, that make her able to read on a first grade level. Words like, THE, AND, CAT, RUN, and such. Certain repetition is the key. The basics of math, like plus and minus. Really just simple things like this, for her age group. We sometimes expect them to understand more, or be able to grasp full sentences, and problems, but we must make sure that we are not expecting too much of them, at this age, either.

    I would, definately, talk to her teacher, and pick the teachers brain. See what the teacher says about her progress, abilities, and in comparison with her fellow students, where she is. You may find that she may be doing perfectly fine with where she is supposed to be in her work. Every child learns at different levels, and paces. Try not to compare them to other siblings, at that age, or even ourselves, at that age. Really, keeping an open relationship with her teacher, is key. See what the teacher says, thats the first and best place to start. Also, keep her teacher on the same page, of what you are doing. Tell the teacher all about the extra tutoring, and sessions, and the specific work you are doing. See what the teacher thinks about it, and or recommends too.

    Hope this helps, and remember, at 6 years old, we can only expect so much from them. All things will become clearer, and work out in time.

  • cognac
    cognac

    Hi Sabin - This is something I've been aware of for years now. I've tried the best I could to get her ahead of the game; however, that pretty much worked for kindergarten...

    She has issues paying attention. Although, she is very well behaved.

    Mostly her issues are with spelling/reading. Math is a secondary issue.

    I've learned the way I work with her is not the best way. I try to do everything at once instead of a little at a time - just more redundant. I've just implemented changing that and hope it helps.

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